FEB 2010 Three is a magic number, yes it is......

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

Come and take shelter from the DC here, folks!

DS came home also covered in paint (shoes, jeans and on his back). His girlfriend and him decided to paint a large picture and then the arms of another girl [oops]

NK I love your DD2 comments.

DS new phrase is 'not yet'. This is driving me mad!!!!!

Third nursery poo today from DD - just as I arrived to collect her, so I changed her (and another leak, but not as disastrous as yesterday's). As soon as we were done, she decided she wanted to stay longer...which was good! And she's been talking about "When I go to nursery school on Friday, I want to stay for tea..." which is a good sign!!
Today was helped by me managing to get DD doing lots of running around and blowing bubbles outside (while DS had a 1.5hr nap, bless him - very helpful!), a very early lunch (11.00) and a nap before nursery. She was still up and down once there, according to the staff, but had a better day generally and actually seemed to be making friends, hooray. I'm starting to feel a bit more optimistic about it all now. DD has also eaten well all three meals today and has been very cheerful and full of energy with us at home....can I dare hope we've properly turned the corner this time??!!

Also good: DS lay smiling and gurgling while I actually got out my guitar for the first time in ages. And he was delighted to be back carried in the sling for a while, which opens up a whole new vista of possibilities, including easier playing with DD, housework...ooh, so much exciting stuff!!

Arf at your DS and the paint, SB!

Sorry to hear about the anxiety, but great that your DD had a good day IC. I am quite I. Awe with how you are dealing with it.

Mous, your situation sounds really difficult. What does your DH do? And where do you think you will move to?

DD1 has perked her ideas up a bit. I had a very firm word on Monday about how she has been chewing her hair, nails, clothes... I know that it can be due to anxiety but for her, it really is just a bad habit. I have tried a reward chart, but these things just don't work for her (not since poo training!) and she only really sorts her ideas out if there is a risk that she will lose privileges if she doesn't So the firm word about the chewing on Monday seems to have had an effect on her behaviour generally.

DD2 is much the same as ever. We are going to playgroup this morning, which she loves.

Like survival, my DH is going away skiing for a long weekend next week. I am actually quite looking forward to it, which is not very nice of me, but mainly because I have lots of nice things planned for me and the girls (seeing people, going to the library - we know how to live ). DH has had a little dip in form recently, but is trying hard again. We talked quite a bit while away, and I think he was also quite shocked at how exhausted I was and realised that he needs to pull his weight a bit more.

Very me, me, me. Apologies. Anyone?

SR that's because you can't see me sobbing despairingly on DH's shoulder after a hard day of it..!!

I've now found a creative therapist - uses music, art and some play therapy to work with LOs and has experience of dealing with anxiety, including separation anxiety and also encopresis. We'll see how it goes... if it can help DD find better outlets for stress - and help her overcome the withholding - it will be money well spent.

IC It must be so hard to get to grips with something you don't understand. No wonder your emotionally exhausted at the end of it.

Just checked on dd2 and love the way she still sometimes sleeps like a baby on her front with her knees pulled up under her and her bottom in the air. Awww.

Aww aren't they adorable at this age? Just woke dd2 for breakfast and she sat up in bed, sighed, and said 'That was a happy dream!' Glad her dreams were nice, I dreamt rubbish all night...

Aw, bless NK!

DD has been back to her usual self today and progressively better through the week. She's eating like it's going out of fashion and has loads more energy and joie de vive again. FX it continues....

Interestingly, observing her at the toddler group we went to today, it's clear she's learning some good lessons at nursery about interacting pleasantly with other children. And she's becoming very tidy, too.

I've noticed in the past week that DD is starting to properly play with some other children now.

dd2 has started to sign her pictures! With a neat zigzag line

oh yes, DD has been insistent on her doing the cards for a while. I have to write on the envelopes who they are to and from

Nice to know things have been good today ic.

I went out with nursery to the woods yesterday. Was a nice walk but ds didn't interact with the other kids really. He also took forever to get his boots on and when I said "you're so easily distracted" one of the staff agreed with me so I felt a bit sad for him and disloyal for criticising him especially in his hearing.

Swimming lesson was good. Was v proud of his confidence but he is a bit younger and shorter than the others so his head isn't quite out of the water whilst standing so next week I'll have to go in the pool with him. He tried so hard and did everything the teacher said and listened really well. He even floated on his back with no one touching him and no floats etc.

I think for most three year olds playing with rather than alongside children their age is still a novelty and takes a while to master. Having said that I can see a massive difference in dd2 compared to dd1 at the same age, simply by having her sister instigating games and involving her in pretend play from a young age. dd2 is very confident to approach other children, not just her own age, and will suggest games to play. She also seems to make friends easily. dd1 found it much harder (not helped by glue ear) and at the same age would only talk to the staff for several months before starting to interact with the other children, with gentle encouragement from the staff. She then happily tagged along with groups of children but didn't have a best friend until she started reception aged just over 4.
It's nice to see dd2 having it a bit easier

Had another 'awwww' moment today, coming home late (dh did the school run). dd2 was already in a sleepsuit (she still has a few with feet that still fit her and make her look more like a baby and very sweet) and flung herself at me in delight, for a very big cuddle. Then dd1 and dd2 talked very fast and both at the same time, keen to tell me all about their day. It was some time before I could put my bag down and take my coat off . I don't like coming home late but I very much like the reception I get!!

Yes NK I agree they are super cute I have a small ball giant balloon of constant cuteness at home!
I also agree with the playing because DD1 has been teaching DD2 she is there much quicker than her sister who wasn't bad as all her friends where older.

Happy woman's day to you all!

IC That is good! You might want to read another book I will try to find a english alternative to the one I am reading in french, I had a lightbulb moment: It was me as a kid, and it is probably DD1 too... We are zebras... I will explain later.
Actually, they might be a lot of us on this thread and in our children.

IC I am sure your interview went better than you think (their loss anyway). How is DS?

oops IC CP of course!

I will post more privately I found a link for you IC

mous interesting booklet.

bc good to hear that your DS is doing well

Do you know when our "babies" start school, would that be sept 2015?

No, sept 2014. In 18 months time... They are mad in the Uk to start formal education at barely 4 years old. At least our Feb10 lot will be 4.5.
Dd1 is doing well but I do think she would have found everything a lot easier if she'd been just 5, not just 4 (late June baby).

but, buut it is next year

I have chosen some "me-time" over going to see our brand new nephew (6 days old) - DH's brother's second baby. Am I a terrible person? (Don't answer that.) DH has taken the girls and I have the house to myself for a couple of hours. It's just such a rare occurance. I was going to make a birthday cake and get started on dinner; but I appear to be on MN....

Mous really sorry to hear that you'll have to come back to the UK. Just... sorry. I hope it goes well for you.

Survival glad your night away with DH was good

IC glad that DD is settling better at nursery. Also hurrah for the back carry sling. Although boo to housework (I am still using the excuse there is no point while we are having work done, even though we are clearly not having work done atm).

SR I was wondering how your DH was behaving these days (for want of a better phrase). I hope you enjoy your LP time. Will you go away for a few days later on, to even it out? Or is it only me who would keep tally like that?!

NK I couldn't agree with you more about starting school at 4. Poor, poor August babies It's just not right IMO.

Waves at CP, bc, SB and hope I haven't missed anyone out.

I have been having a bit of a bad patch with DH lately. Not super-bad but he is just being a typical selfish man and it is winding me up. He had laser eye surgery last weekend which put him out of action for the whole weekend (meant to recover in 24 hours) and so I felt like a single parent for the weekend (in the spirit of full disclosure I must admit we were at my mum's, but the responsibility still fell to me IYSWIM). He has Friday afternoons off but spent this afternoon catching an hour train each way for another eye appointment, READING A BOOK, while I walked the children to soft play in the pouring, pouring rain. I just feel that he pleases himself and never considers whether I might like some time off. Also the money, it is 'his' money as he earned it so he can spend £££££££ on himself, but I can't afford laser eye surgery as I'm not working because I am LOOKING AFTER HIS CHILDREN. Then I came home to his dirty washing up last night after a meal out with my sister when I have REPEATEDLY asked him not to leave his washing up for me.

Sorry, this all looks very very petty, and is I'm sure. I just feel totally grumpy with him at the moment and that's not like us at all.

Scones, my DH can be a bit like yours. When I am feeling charitable and thinking rationally, I feel it isn't intentional rubbishness, more that he literally doesn't see things and think things through the way I do. When I'm not feeling so rational and nice, it drives me crazy!

At the moment, things are ok. He is listening more, though he still often reacts badly to things I say but he is trying to work on that. He is very busy at work and is terrible at switching from work to home - he says it will calm down soon, but he is always really into his work so I am unconvinced. Weekends are certainly better, but during the week I pretty much do every evening on my own and most of the morning (he does breakfast with the girls, then leaves). I have got used to it, to be honest.

As for whether I keep tally, no I don't. But it does mean that I don't feel bad about going to see a friend over the late may bank holiday for four days

Sorry scones, meant to say that you don't need to feel bad about not going to see the new baby. Everyone needs some time

Scones I agree with SR

It is mother's day here and I had a wonderful flower sticked and a butterfly shape poem and some irises for women's day

dd2 made some little chocolatey treats presented in a painted basket. She was very clear they are for mother's day but this morning got too tempted and kept licking them... I then had one and told her she could eat the other two (didn't much fancy pre-licked chocolate for mother's day). So far so good, but then she had a melt down about five times today, every time she spotted the little empty basket, because the treat was strictly for mother's day! Didn't help when I told her they were gone because she ate them...