November 2012 - sleeping through yet?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1647736-November-2012-losing-sleep-and-losing-weight

Stats list: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1485512-November-2012-Stats-List

Wowsers - it's taken me all morning to catch up on the nights chatter!!!!

vq if you are going to try formula again - try having it really quite warm - Dottie will not drink her bottle unless it is as warm as bm - which when you test on the wrist you can feel it as warm as opposed to not feel at all. And heaven forbid it cools down to much else she will just clamp her mouth shut lol!!! She definitely prefers bm.

On the contraception issue - the implant has settled down after being ridiculously itchy, I'm ok with dtd but why must it take soooo long lol that precious minutes I could be sleeping, I'm a great fan of the quickie but unfortunately dh isn't 😒

Last night I nearly lost it 😭 Dottie was doing the whole 20 minutes on boob, fall asleep, move her, wakes up goes nuts until given the boob again!!! I went to the loo for less then 5 minutes and came back to her in absolute hysterics, bright red, rigid, screaming like someone was murdering her. I tried calming her down, cuddling, swaying and kissing her but nope until I put her to the boob - angry little witch!!!! Tried feeding her, swaddling her and putting on the womb noise and putting her in the crib while awake to get used to self settling which amazingly she did - but for only 30 minutes and this just continued all the while dh is either snoring or suggesting giving her hungrier baby formula grrrrrrrrrr!!! I was in tears from midnight until 3 am - toying with giving in and swapping to formula :( I know I should count my blessings and be so grateful for the majority of good nights we have if she woke every 3 hours I think I would leave home :(

I just want feeds to have a start and a finish 😭

Sorry for the self pitying post - just having a really crap teary day :,(

Glenda - having only ff I can't say about switching. What I can say is we can have exactly the same issue feeding from the bottle!!

Right. Do I brave walking the dogs to the park with ds in the sling or load the dogs into the car and just go to a big field where I don't need to worry about being pulled and slipping in the snow?! I'm thinking the latter. ESP as I saw two car accidents on mmthe walk I was thinking about doing.....

glenda that sounds like me and little pig a few days ago - she would only sleep if she was sniffing naked boob, and fed nonstop for well over 2 hours which ended in tears for me and red raw nipples Fingers crossed it goes better from now on for you - have a lovely lazy day if you can, eat chocolate and slob

Big field horsey you don't want to risk slipping with the sling. Easily done when being walked by walking the dogs (if they're anything like mine)

Proper winter has started here finally. Minus three at the moment, a sprinkling of snow but lovely bright sunshine. GOrgeous

It's snowing in Leeds, proper big snow! It's lovely to look at through the window but I'm not looking forward to the school run.

I've bought a TT bottle to try today with a size 2 teat. Really hope she takes it.

toomany am at you living in Leeds. I love it there. We won't ever move back to the UK as DH doesn't speak much English - well he does, but not enough for him to be confident about working in English full time- but I often secretly dream about living just outside Leeds in the countryside. There is so much to do and everywhere is drivable from there - coast not too far etc. Every school holiday as a kid at least once I would insist we got up very early to take the one train a day to Leeds across the Dales and spend the day there. I don't know why particularly.

I'll shut up now before you all decide I'm a bit weird.

Arrgghh, yes catbag MIL is driving me nuts! She's now sulking with me as I said that I had it under control when she started telling off DS1 for not eating properly with his spoon. I was at the table feeding him and dealing with it yet she had to interbloodyfere.

That is pretty much the first time I've asked her not to step in when I'm dealing with a situation as I knew this would be the response. It massively confused DS1 when she was here to help post CS as she stepped in to the mother role (pushed me out) and I don't think he knew who he should be taking instruction from.

She's not speaking to me now even though I tried to ask as nicely as possible.

glenda yep, perhaps room temp was not a good idea perhaps I am subconsciously sabotaging it.

vq I've been lucky in that DD1 has always taken her milk cold or at room temperature. LO won't. It has to be just right. I heat it for 4 seconds per ounce in the microwave and shake it up. She seems to like it that way. Woe betide me if it's slightly over or slightly under.... Hope this doesn
.t mean she's going to be a fussy eater

rowing I have similar gripes with my MIL. Her solution to M's sleepless nights is to leave her crying in a dark room on the other side of the house she's 6 weeks old ffs although it did seem a tempting prospect at 3am

glenda you just described my night. Except my dh was at sea.

I've had 4hrs sleep this morning since he got home. Genuinely beginning to dread tonight as I am so knackered already . I will stick at it. Doubt formula will make my life any easier anyway...

Leeds is lovely petite but I am more at you living in France! Where are you from in the UK? I love the Yorkshire dales, we spent a week in a cottage there over Christmas last year.

I always find that we have a good night after a terrible night like that MM. It's like she knows that she can't push her luck two nights running.

RL baby grow looked posh lol but I bought him it as a Xmas gift as his big present. N only bought him 2 books n a rattle other then that so justified it to myself. Also bought it knowing he would wear it to the party.
It really isn't how I generally dress my lil one. Ppl roll their eyes at me n my posh stuff.
But I have strict rules. As LO is asleep I will share them with u. A few years ago I realised I had 40 hand bags. Ranging from £5-£60. I realised that rather then spending all that money on 40 bags. I should have bought a few very good bags. So now on my bday every year I use my bday money from parents n siblings to buy a good bag n top up myself. I do not buy bags/ purses other then that 1 a Year. Last year I bought a LV bag. But bought it keeping in mind I wanted to use it as a nappy bag. Yesterday I used it first time as a nappy bag.

I won't spend loads of money on clothes as they go out of fashion. I do shop at cheaper places. This means I can save for bigger things like shoes/ bags that I will one day give to my daughter(when I have one). Lol.
Same with jewellery. I'm currently saving for some earrings. But haven't bought any jewellery for 2 years to mk up for it. Still saving tho!

That's my shopping philosophy .

I know alot of my family who criticise me for my big expenses. But then I don't care lol I wouldn't spend 40 on Xmas crackers! Also keep in mind we live with parents! I guess there r some perks to living with pil!

I had a horrible night last night. Oscar slept beautifully 12-6.30. I slept 6-6.30 . I've had a couple of hours this morning. But I feel like death warmed up. I took nytol at 5 which I think was the only thing that eventually sent me off. DP snored so terribly I was considering all kinds of torture on him. I had all kinds of shit going around in my head and my brain just would not switch off. My main worry seems to surround the feeling that going back to work is creeping up very quickly. I am scared of how things will be and if I will cope. And most of all leaving him :(

I threw all the size 1 teats out yesterday. Since then we've been having a lot of large vom incidents. Sods law.

I'm in a bad mood today I think!!

I guess there r some perks to living with pil - they'd have to be bloody big perks

toomany I'm from Lancashire

Living in France is nice too.

Detective I have had some horrendous nights recently. Ironic that when LO woke up squawking regularly I'd have given anything for a bit of sleep, but now she is sleeping through most nights (not that a certain poster on another thread would believe that) I cn't sleep. Last night was my first decent night in ages.

BigPig I'd have to be paid. A lot.

Det I know it's not good. But maybe u should take the nytol earlier? Just take it when u go to bed for a few days, hopefully it will sort out ur sleep pattern. Might be better then staying awake till 5am?

It's the way you praise your child that's important Eliza. If your child does well on a test you don't praise by saying "You're so clever" since that leads to thinking you don't need to work cos you're clever. You say "Well done for studying hard" because then you're praising the good behaviour of studying.

It is frustrating me as I did that GT I took the nytol for a few days, got myself in to a more reasonable pattern of sleeping, stopped it, was fine for a couple of days, and now back to square one. Definitely taking it tonight. I didn't take it til 5 last night as I kept thinking Oscar would wake any time, and it seemed pointless I suppose. But then desperation kicked in!

I am very frustrated - I only used to be like this post night shift insomnia! Perhaps it is the waking in the nights that is causing it.

If it continues for another few weeks I might go and speak to the GP. However I am reluctant to do that as I don't believe proper sleeping pills to be the cure. Plus I can't take anything that knocks me out completely for obvious reasons.

The nytol is herbal stuff, probably a placebo, but hey, if it works, it works! It just says don't take for more than 7 days without seeing a GP. However I haven't taken it for 7 days, but have taken more than 7 days worth in the last few weeks.

I've done the whole milky drink, warm bath, wind down, no screen time thing. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Ie. it makes no difference really, as some nights I can sleep fine anyway, some nights I can't.

I'm my own worst enemy sometimes.

Matilda hasnt pooed for 2 days. Before this it was at least 2/3 times a day. Still plenty of wet nappies. Should I be worried? She's 6 weeks and ebf.

I understand ur frustration. Like me u can't even take anything stronger as we can't rely on DHs to fully take over for the night as they don't wake up

I was so tiered this morning after party n DH so hung over. Did not mk for a nice start to the day.

missmummy ebf babies can sometimes not poo for a good bit, even a week or so. Apparently it's normal for them, or so I've read on various threads here.

Yet again I have a non napping baby. He has been awake since 8.30 am and only dropped off for around ten mins. This was what my daughter was like, she never napped and it was a nightmare. She did however sleep through the night quite early.

MM as I understand it, ebf babies are okay not to poo for days, as bm is easily digested with little waste. DS did a massive poo-nami today after not pooing properly since Friday. It caused him a little distress as it went all up his back but was just a slightly thicker paste, as it were, but definitely not solid/problematic.

If she seems otherwise well I would not worry MM.

GT What is it about men that don't wake up?! I feel bad because I am judging him on my ex who DID wake up. Every time. He did more night feeds than I did to be honest. But he isn't mr amazing dad or anything. So why doesn't DP wake? The first 2 nights he shot up like he'd been poked in the arse, at Oscars first murmurs. I think it is because he doesn't want to wake, so has learned to ignore somehow.

Can we have a hands up - who's DH/DP's do not even stir when the baby cries?? DP reckons most men don't. I suspect a lot don't, but doesn't make it okay, does it?! He wants to know 'what the fuck am I supposed to do about it, it isn't my fault?'!!! Well what would we do if I didn't wake either? I don't think it is good enough. We are both supposed to be equal parents. We will be sharing maternity leave. He is only in work 2.5 days a week still, so I don't think it is unreasonable to ask him to wake for the odd night feed. This is possibly what is keeping me awake at night - worrying. Worrying how I will cope when back at work if he does not take over as Oscars main carer for those 3 months. I need him to wake at night so that I can get adequate rest for work. It isn't like I can sit around all day, or think 'fuck it' and put less than 100% in for the day. It just doesn't work that way. :(

He doesn't see why I am worried though. I'm going to end up being driven insane if he doesn't give me the reassurance that he can keep it together to get us through this first year - undeniably the hardest time for any parents. I need him to either be the main (or equal) earner, so I don't have to be, and can take on more at home (both caring for children and the house), or I remain the main earner, and he takes on more at home. Something has to give. He doesn't have the capacity currently to earn what I do unfortunately, so really, there is no choice. I have to work FT, and him PT, or even FT if he wants - but he can't get the hours, so that is that really.

If he was working FT, Oscar would be with a childminder when we were at work, and I would get a cleaner twice a week. .