November 2012 - babies are here at last

[StuntNun]

This is the post-natal club for graduates of the November 2012 intake.

Thanks for that post Stunt. My eyes welled up! DP was feeling really guilty at my experience as I wanted a calm home water birth and instead I was in hospital being induced twice. Although my second attempt labour lasted around 4-5 hours to birth it was a horrendous experience for me but I'll save the details for when I can piece it together. Also DP got kicked out home when we got back to the ward that night and I felt so lost and alone, hence the nappy melt down and me getting hysterical when he vommed for the first time and I thought he couldn't breathe. He was also grunting, snorting, snuffling and showing some mild signs of respiratory distress when the doctor did his baby check so he was whisked off to SCBU for a couple of hours leaving a hysterical mum behind again! He's fine though .

The 3 of us are just learning and making progress each day . He is my little champion .

I hope everyone is well. I found the recent talk on wind issues and crying really helpful because James screams blue murder then eventually squeezes out about 14 farts. I can't help but giggle when he burps and farts at the same time .

eliza glad it's not just me then!

After an entire morning of fussing, pooing, on and off (mostly off) feeding and getting v frustrated she is asleep.
Don't know what's wrong with her though.

For those struggling to stay awake during night feeds - I'm finding our new smart TV a godsend especially as J can take up to 1.5 hours a feed! I'm working my way through the Greys Anatomy collection on Love Film. Better than sitting in a darkened bedroom or listening to News 24 repeat itself every 15 mins.

MW has advised us to go to the docs re the green poos as he's had them now for 4 days. So I'm going to battle the weather and get the bus into Stromness - wish us luck!

Stunt that post was lovely and v helpful to read and understand others have been through. Thank you.

Well we had a rough night. LO sleeps and feeds well during day but from 10pm till 3am wants to cluster feed constantly. I'm so shattered as had 4 nights before the birth of no sleep and not been able to catch up on sleep properly since. It's amazing how u can't cope when sleep deprived. My milk came last night and my boobs were agony! On fire, couldn't bare fabric touching them so was walking around topless with a cold compress on them. Fetching! I was desperate to sleep but LO had other ideas. He would fall asleep on the breast then ad soon ad I lay him down would become frantic trying to root around do back on he went. This was non stop for 5 hrs. Why do they do this cluster feeding thing at night not during day? There is prob some primal reason for it. Ashamed to say at 3am I burst into tears as was so tired and tried giving him a dummy as by then he was chewing my v painful nipples for what seemed like comfort. He's only 3 days so giving him dummy was probably stupid thing to do. But I was desperate! At first he took to it and it really calmed him down but then it kept falling out and I decided to write off any night time sleep and let him feed till we both fell asleep in feeding position (not v safe!).

We have both slept from 5.30 till 8 then 8.30 till 11 so feel much much better again. Just need to get napping during the day then it will be easier to cope with no sleep at night?

Has anyone else introduced a dummy yet? I gave DD one at about 2 weeks old and it was a life saver!

Such a lovely post vq

Afraid I have lost track of who has given birth and who is still expecting. I'm loving seeing the baby pics appear on facebook. I only really catch up when baby is sleeping and don't tend to post as I try sleep when he does! We were initially waking him every 3 hours during the day if he didn't wake for feeds but he does his own thing now!

Had an awful nite, from230 till 5 baby evil would not stop crying. Still hasn't settled from this morning feed.

Car still not fixed, and I'm running out of infacol. :( :(
Evil

My mum has come round so I can have a sleep. Now I can't sleep.

debussey I've started to use a dummy, when I am sure DS cannot be hungry and just wants to comfort suck. DD was a v sucky baby and needed it. It does calm DS so he drifts off, and at night has stretched the gap between feeds a bit. But he is still little so am trying not to use more than strictly necessary, but if I didn't use it at all, DS would be on my nipples from 7pm - 3am.

Stunt thank u for sharing that. Hugs x
Pecky ditto laughing at carts n burps . However need to find out how to easy pain! He goes bright red. N that's not nice for me or him.

Debuss I was going to say so thin to u but can't remember what. at myself.

Oh yeah. Dummy. I gave in Sunday night n gave him a dummy, it was at the crying part of his evening 4 hour winge session. He stopped for 5 seconds then pushed it out. . I thought a dummy would solve all my problems.

Just had a look at our other thread. Six babies yesterday!

Girls at school and nursery today, so just me and baby as DH at work. Why am I doing housework? Why can I not sleep?

Thank you stunt. I was desperate to speak to someone in the first couple of days after my EMCS. My DH didn't seem to understand and others that I tried to broach it with didn't really seem that interested, so I let the matter drop before really saying anything. A mother that I know who also had twins and a CS asked how I was doing emotionally after the CS and I found, to my surprise, that I choked up immediately. I made my excuses and ran as I was in the street with the other DCs and didn't want to burst into tears in front of them, but it made me realise that I will need to work through it rather than ignoring it. I haven't posted my birth story yet because of this reason.

I feel a little pathetic since others have had far more traumatic births and I have physically recovered from the CS very swiftly, but I'm very aware that I've locked these emotions in a box for now, and I've had 6 kids. It must be awful for those who have been traumatised by the first birth. Take stunt's advice. She very wise :)

vq Saul grizzled from 2am this morning. I've had 45mins sleep. I too am doing housework. We are mad.

I agree with stunt. Indeed I frequently do. She is a star

After my first 'normal' birth, I swore I would never have any more. After a debrief, and actually understanding what had happened and why, I have since gone on to have two more. The memories do come back, and can be troublesome sometimes, but it is better to talk about things, and accept you have these feelings. I found the few days leading up to her birthday each year were hard. She is six now, and her birthdays are getting easier. I didn't have as traumatic a time as some, but it is not a pissing contest. If it affects you, it affects you and needs addressing. I am so glad I did, although would be financially better off, and no doubt thinner if I hadn't

I am so glad I had my tubes done. It is wonderful not having to think about contraception ever again!

Minimal soreness now. Wound still bloody open at nearly 3 weeks though.

debussy your night sounds just like my day today! I've sterilised the dummies but she finally fell asleep in my arms so I've stuck her I. Her swing chair which has kept her happy for the past half an hour.
My milk came in yesterday too and also in loads of pain, can't sleep on either side or my back (so can't sleep basically) I've been expressing a bit and getting her to feed but she's not draining them.

In fact, general question about bf, if she's not completely draining my boobs at a feed will I get blocked ducts? I've got loads of milk because it hasn't adjusted to her needs yet so I assumed she just didnt want the whole lot but now I'm worried about the milk she's leaving in there.
They feel hard all the time, never soft so they're never empty.

Your boobs will settle. I have yet to express, and my boobs were rock hard as he was not draining them. At one point I was soaking wet with leaking milk, but now my breasts are soft, and I just get the let down when he feeds, or is due a feed. Expressing will increase supply.

That's interesting VQ I was going to ask about expressing. I was trying to express on top of bf but it was making me feel ill and the stress of trying to fit it in was wearing me out. However I do want to start again, so will my milk respond when I do? I am guessing I will have to do it a bit at a time and then increase. But I was worried if I hadn't established it early then I wouldn't be able to start in terms of volume.

I don't think I explained that v well but hopefully it made sense. Bit overtired.

That's why I don't express til they're empty, just to take the edge off. Also she can't latch on when they're that full so it makes it easier for her I find.

It's funny how when you're preg you buy all these cute clothes in tiny sizes, nice prams and car seats etc and all I care about is her feeding/ sleep etc. she's pooed in every outfit she's worn
I obv didn't learn with ds!

stunt I agree with your lovely post entirely. I had a very difficult time with number 3 and went through a period of being terrified about number four, but with lots of help and support I ended up being really relaxed and having a really positive birth this time. My problem is always bottling things up and pretending I can cope and it is the worse the guy can do. This time I told everyone I was scared and I got the support I needed.

Xx

Something else to worry about .
Apart from the pain in my left boob today they haven't felt any different.
At first I was worried that my milk hasn't come in. But my expressed milk from yellow to white. N others confirmed that this was ok. Now my boobs have not ever felt hard. Despite not expressing since yesterday 6pm. So would assume they r engorged. But not hard. They feel a little firmer?
On further groping my right boobs is firmer then left. But I got more milk out of right, so y is it harder. So confused.
Then on a related note. How do u know ur "letting down"?
N how do u know ur boob is fully drained?

Jezz. When I have a few minutes to myself my brain goes on over drive.

Ps. Changed membrain n managed to get an 1.5oz bug improvement from last two sessions of zilch

Your breast is never completely drained. The initial let down for a lot of women is an almost painful feeling in both breasts, usually after baby starts sucking, or if you are thinking milky thoughts when wanting to express, or when some random baby cries in the supermarket if you have norks like mine. The let down is when the milk reservoirs in your boobie fill with milk.

Baby initially gets watery milk to quench thirst, then the hind milk comes, which is higher in calories and thicker. It is best to keep baby on one boobie as long as they will feed to ensure they get the good stuff. If baby starts playing with that boob, offer the other too. Start the next feed on the boob baby had a little bit from. I.e the second one to be offered.

Baby will likely prefer one breast, get more from the one side, so that will be the better milker. With DD2 the left one gave up at about 11 months, so I just fed her from the right from them on.

I plan to start expressing soon blonder. Our kids are practically twins so I am sure you will be fine to start soon too. Start small and gradually the amounts will increase. Night time and morning is the best yield. I never express in the evening as you want baby to have as much milk as possible then, and your supply will be lower. I usually express 10 Mls off both, then drain them both once baby is settled after a feed. If baby decides they are still hungry, they will still get milk from you. Our boobies are constantly refilling if stimulated to do so. Sometimes quicker than others.

I asked DH soon after the birth if he still wanted to do a feed every day or so. He said no as he had too much to do already he loved feeding the girls. I have never given a bottle of formula or expressed whilst feeding. Baby needs to know you only give milk from boobie, otherwise they could decide to go on strike until the easy bottle shows up.

I have rearranged the nursery this afternoon. I will be told off. I do not care.

Sorry if post not clear. Am a bit brain fucked. When expressing do so when you can see baby, or have a pic, and think about feeding to start everything flowing. It is not an easy thing to do when at work inbetween seeing clients knowing your boss is in the next room. Make sure you lock the door at work also!

Owww she hasn't fed since half 1/ 2ish and my left boob is throbbing and has stingy/ shooty pains :(

I'm finding all this BF / expressing chat v v helpful. Great advice yet again VQ.

My boobs are less painful today and he is latching on ok I think as only 10 secs of pain then it eases. With DD it was pain the whole feed that made me cry. Think I had terrible latch with her. I'm going to start expressing from sat onwards i think to give me a week to establish quantities then go from there.

Can't believe how he has fed and slept no prob from 8am thus morning and I know come 10pm he'll be a frantic crying hungry Horace all through the night!!

Merconium poohs have stopped today and the lovely greenly/yellow with seeds poohs are arriving! Hoorah. I am also tired brain fucked to be so excited about pooh.

DH21 I've been getting some of that stabby boob pain too when haven't fed him for 2hrs or so...