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Jan 2012 - Higgs Boson Gang pt1

747 replies

Oeisha · 10/01/2012 22:09

Link to antenatal thread for convenience

Not a very good title, but it will suffice 'til we fill this one in record time!

Congratulations to all that have popped so far! Thanks Bear

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 01/02/2012 12:16

Oh ghost, i'm so sorry, I wish there was something useful I could do :-(
In the absence of that it'll have to be a virtual hug and an offer for you to come over and see me if you want to be miserable together? X

ghosteditor · 01/02/2012 12:34

Thanks ladies. I do have plans to see people over the weekend but everyone is at work the rest of the time, and I'm still struggling with managing the house, DD, food, medical check ups, and the ever elusive naps! DH has been so brilliant while he's been at home and now he's effectively going away for 5 days straight off the bat. And I feel so sorry that he's going to miss this time with DD while she's so tiny. Am so thankful she's quite a placid baby!

Argh. Stupid work. Stupid need to pay the enormous mortgage. Argh.

fishandlilacs · 01/02/2012 12:45

is anyone elses baby a total fuss arse? My boy simply doesn't settle unless he's got a boob in his mouth. I have tried slinging him, tried his chair, tried the bed, tried cuddling, he's not interested in boob now he's had a full go on both. I have winded him and he's full nappy.

abeautifulbutterfly · 01/02/2012 13:15

Sounds like a heavy day for most of you today Sad. We need to be easy on ourselves - we're all still less than a month on from one of the most life-changing events we'll ever experience and everything is still very raw (literally in some respects Grin).
My bleeding at day 14 is still rather profuse but is getting lighter in colour. I did pass a rather large clot yesterday, though, about the size of a smallish satsuma Confused.
YY to BFing in different positions - I find the rugby hold is great for drawing off the milk from the duts on the outsides of the breasts.

Oh such bloody clever HVs telling you to make them self-settle at this age... Anyway, where's the fun in not cuddling your LO to sleep? - this is the only time we'll ever get to do it. They go off so quickly and easily all snuggled up - I reckon we need to make life easier for ourselves at this stage, not harder smile]
Ghost that's really not on about your DH's work...
Oh, must go, girls home

FrillyMilly · 01/02/2012 14:03

This is starting to move as quick as the antenatal one did now!

peanuts congratulations on birth of Wilbur. Sorry you had to go through such a tough time. Glad he is on the men's and I hope you are ok too.

I'm on day 11 and loss is like a period now. I think last time I bled for about 3 weeks. Had a few days off then period showed up. I'm breast feeding this time though so not sure if period will show up.

Can't believe someone's health visitor told them to teach baby to self settle. They are far too young to do that!! They have been carried about all warm and snug for 9 months where they where rocked to sleep all the time. How on earth could they self settle. In a few weeks or months maybe but I certainly couldn't do it now. With DD she didn't self settle until 1 which was when she was ready.

FrillyMilly · 01/02/2012 14:03

That should say mend not men's

FrillyMilly · 01/02/2012 14:06

Oh yes and contraception wise we are thinking the coil. Don't have to worry about it for 5 years. We are 99.9% sure we don't want another baby and we did discuss permanent methods but we've decided to go with a long term method then we can see how we feel when that comes out.

Fryn · 01/02/2012 15:52

I'm heeeere!

Just squeaked into Jan, and Alice Grace was born at home yesterday weighing 8lbs 9oz. All things considered I had a doddle of a birth - waters went 6pm on Monday, took them a couple of hours to track down the midwives as no one knew who was on call Confused, so they came around 9, and absolutely nothing happening, no dilation, no contractions, nowt. They left, started having a few tightenings around 11, proper contractions around 2, but around 10 mins apart, around 4 got a lot more regular and sitting down was painful so spent a couple of hours pacing the living room, called MW at 6 just to say they were every 5 or so minutes apart but I was fine so she said she'd pop by at 9, put phone down and about 20 mins later they were every 2 mins, DH called MW back, and she arrived to me bellowing "I need to push" and DH begging me not to! Alice born 10 mins later, but unfortunately due to nasty 2nd degree tear I had to go to hospital anyway for suturing. Anyway, compared to some of you, I really did have it easy so mustn't grumble.

Bgger me though, I'd forgotten how sodding painful BFing is! I know she's not latching quite right, as she's making a clicking sound - anyone else found that? The latch looks fine, but it just isn't. Good tips about changing position - I'm sorry you've had to go through mastitis to share it with us though cakes*. Hope that's all cleared quickly.

oeisha hope the nipple shields work - it's all such a worry, and shouldn't be. The important thing is that Abi's fed, and she really won't give a monkeys in years to come whether it was breastmilk or formula (I was formula fed and it's had absolutely no ill effects on me or my relationship with my mum).

ghost so sorry about DH's work. That sucks, but you'll get through it. And really don't worry about managing the house - just look after yourself and Jools and have a lovely snuggly girly time.

peanuts I'm sorry you've had such a time with Wilbur. I hope the little guy's doing better and you're ok as well.

Sorry girls, my tired brain can't remember anything else apart from those bits, but hope you're all ok and see you on here later!

miamama09 · 01/02/2012 16:58

congrats to fryn and welcome baby Alice. Hope the BFing settles down soon, it is so sore, they always tell you it isn't, but it so is!

oeisha I second what everyone else has said, any amount of BFing is great! you've given her the best start possible, some babies just don't get the hang of it... and u know what, it's important to get yourself well and better and recovered too.

it was my HV who told me to leave baby to self settle. I must admit, I haven't been able to do it. he's still so tiny! how can you NOT cuddle them to sleep. DD was cuddled to sleep until nearly 1 too, it was hard to get her to change that habit... but at just a few weeks old, I'm not sure they can really learn to self settle that much... can they?

Blood loss - mine comes and goes every few days too. I was going to ask about it on here, so glad it's been discussed already!

miamama09 · 01/02/2012 17:00

ugh, also, DS has a cold already! he's snuffly and can't breathe properly, it's horrible having to listen to him struggle and fish tiny baby bogeys out of his nose already! and there's nothing I can do to help him.
Been wrapped up warm all day, and in sling all snuggled for a good part, so hope it passes soon. he's in his basket now, coughing and snuffling away in his sleep...

shonnomanom · 01/02/2012 17:22

Boob question

I have an ache in the outside of my right boob. Just started this morning. No lumps or anything was found. Boob feels normal but its sore to touch and so makes holding ds akward.
After mix ff and bf feeding ds is now ff exclusive. I was careful cutting down on the feeds and only had one feed left to cut when he decided he wasnt going anywhere near them. Proper fighting them he was. The last time he fed from me was Friday night.
Any ideas ladies? Surely if there were to be boob issues from stopping the bf it would have happened before now?
TIA

MakesCakesWhenStressed · 01/02/2012 18:24

Shon - that's exactly how my mastitis started - like yourboob has been kicked by a horse and is all bruised? Keep an eye on things, try hot compresses and gentle massage over the sore bit from under the arm, esp when feeding, but any sign of flu- like symptoms and get to the gp immediately for anti-biotics

shonnomanom · 01/02/2012 18:54

Ah feck cakes I just said to dp how I think I'm coming down with something. Feeling really light headed and congested. Could fall asleep right now given half a chance. We're ff exclusively now but Il try hot and cold compress. Thank you x

shonnomanom · 01/02/2012 19:28

Busy thread today , have now caught up.

ghost ((hugs)) very crap of dh and his work

bleeding - slowing down and is on and off. Relieved as bleed constant after dd for 9 weeks.

mia ds has had the sniffles since about day 2. I feel so sorry for him. Scotland is freezing just now!

Congrats fryn on baby Alice

Hope everyone else is ok. Im off the the freezer to find the ice pack for this boob x

Oeisha · 01/02/2012 19:37

Well, now I'm all kinds of confused. Guess who just latched and fed for 20mins...or I assume she fed. Can't really tell if she swallowed, but it seems like it. My boobs are perpetually leaking (my leg gets very obviously damp if I try and leave one out to air post-expressing) and her face was damp, and there wasn't a massive flood of milk when she de-latched...so I can only assume she fed properly. Had just got used to the idea of FF and the convenience this brings too...though I'm not chicken-counting at the moment. Now have no idea what to feel about it all. I want to BF, but if it's anything like as draining af expressing and EBF then I really don't know if I'll cope.

Stupid question, but will she self-regulate eating from boob? She def de-latched optionally and then didn't want it back post-burping, but is now snuffling about again, though isn't crying and isn't doing the usual routine for food. Had only just cleaned up a poo-nappy (though I do realise this is no guarantee it hasn't happened again)...so I don't think that's it.

sho I've had a cold (thankfully fairly mild) since a couple of days before Snufflix was born, so you have my sympathies. It seems to be easing today. Just in time for DH to do his back in picking up Abi.

Contraception wise, I think I'll stick with cerazette. Whilst there's no way in hell I want another baby right now, I want my options open. My OBGYN Auntie recommended against the coil (though she prefers the Merina coil FYI) if you might want more - figuring, if it does fail, or goes wrong, then coils can go wrong dramatically IYSWIM, whereas drug therapy isx mostly reversible. I am sort of tempted by the implant, but on depo I had fairly bad hairloss, and just wasn't 100% happy with it. Will have to talk to my GP.

OP posts:
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 01/02/2012 19:51

Oeisha - when you feel a fluttering kind of suck from DD then you know she's reached the hind hind milk at the end of the feed (the very fatty high calorie stuff she needs to grow) and if she de-latches after that then she should be OK.

As far as I can tell the only way to know if a BF baby is getting enough food is if they're doing lots of wet and dirty nappies and putting on weight.

And yes, she should self regulate eatong from boob. DS had a feeding frenzy a few nights ago and when we weighed him we found out he'd put on 5 oz in 3 days! He's been much more laid back since then, so he's obviously happy with the amount of milk he 'ordered'.

fishandlilacs · 01/02/2012 19:53

Contraception-I am going to be sterilised, dh is having the snip, i'm going on the pill and were using condoms forever more! :)

Seriously-he has said he will think about the snip-I also will consider sterilisation but as I have had a laparoscopy and 2 c sections I am not keen for more surgical procedures in that department. I think DH feels the same he has had to have several surgical procedures in his area in the past ad isn't keen to go there again but I do understand it's a hell of a lot more straight forward for fellas. I aso know a woman who at the grand age of 60 has a 17 yr old son at home because her sterilisation failed 11 years after having it done. She has 4 boys 3 in thier 30's 4 grand kids and one son at home doing A levels.

My lochia seems to have eased off a bit today after moaning about it not changing.

oiesha thats really good she may well get the hang of it after all xx

fishandlilacs · 01/02/2012 19:54

ooooh and congrats fryn xxxxx

Wormshuffler · 01/02/2012 20:02

Abstinence is my method of contraception! No seriously though I think dh is ha ing the snip. I definitely wont have anymore as they said my uterus was in a horrific state when they did this third cs. There were so many eddisions that it took 40 minutes to deal with them before they could get meg out. It was scary swing them panic that my spinal would run out before they finished!

Dh says he wants the snip and no more kids but it is entirely his decision, I don't want to push him into it.

Anyone got a nighttime routine yet? We are bathing just after 8 and settling, however it 10 by the tune she settles.

Mum2be79 · 01/02/2012 20:07

feeding Mainly a description of my experience this last month to give those who are struggling with BF an idea as to how I coped with it.

When William was born (scary c section due to placenta abruption and him in distress and needing help) he struggled to latch on. We persevered but 30 hours later he had low blood sugar (and showing signs of GBS) and was given formula (aptamil) via a cup from a midwife. His blood sugar still wasn't rising so off he popped to SCBU for two days (mainly because of GBS thing - which was negative!) to have formula and BF from me when I was on my feet - 48 hours later.

William continued to struggle to latch on and WWIII nearly broke out between MWs on postnatal ward and nurses caring for the SCBs on SCBU because the latter suggested nipple shields. For 6 days, William was breast-fed and everything was going okay. He was putting on weight.

By the time we got home a week later, William wanted to be on the breast from 5pm until midnight, sometimes later (at one point 3:45am). He would fall asleep and 10 minutes after being taken off (despite attempts to rouse him) he would scream to be back on. I calculated that he was being fed up to 14/15 hours a day some days! I was beside myself with physical and emotional tiredness. In desperation, we even tried to give him formula (at 3am!) but we were all distressed (including Dad) that it didn't happen.

2 weeks after his birth my mum came down for 2 weeks. She was an absolute God-send. The day she arrived, I was crying every hour. I was so, so tired and BF was obviously not working. He was gaining weight but in doing so, he was sending me down the path of PND! Mum suggested combination feeding. So I did. I got a breast pump (used one in hospital and encouraged!) and decided to express and give via bottle since mixing with formula.

Since then, I have never looked back. So much so that William is now exclusively bottle fed. We tried SMA but he seemed windy on that and have gone back to aptamil as he had it in hospital and he is so much better. I gave up the expressing. I was getting 50z in 30-40 mins but it meant that I couldn't leave the house for any length of time if I wanted to cos I needed to express.

Now I express only morning and night as advised to miss out a 'feed' to give up the milk to avoid mastitis. So far it is working as was doing it 4/5 times a day!

One MW told me that it was too early to express (at 2 weeks of age) despite it being encouraged in hospital, William liking it and at the time mixing bottle feeding (formula and breast milk) with actual breast feeding!

William was weighed yesterday. He was born 6lbs 6oz and at one month of age weighed 8lbs 9oz - exactly on the 9th percentile as he was at birth! So William is definitely not worse the wear for it!

Breast feeding is hard. If you want to do it then do it and get as much support as you want and need. If you don't want to do it, don't. it isn't for everyone. Remember - lots of children are formula fed and they turn out just fine.

Oeisha · 01/02/2012 20:10

The snuffling lead to a catastrpohic booting allover the moses basket. Sad 3rd time today she's vommited badly...hasn't done so like this since she was hacking up all the in-utero gunk. She doesn't seem too bothered now, but will mention it to MW.

OP posts:
Mum2be79 · 01/02/2012 20:12

routine

Just started mine today. I wanted to follow this feed schedule (some flexibility) as got a free book with a pregnancy magazine and liked the advice.
7am
10am
1pm
4pm
bath then 7pm
night feeds at 1am and 4am

However it turned out to be this:
6am (5oz)
10am 95oz)
2pm (4oz)
4:30pm (2oz)
bath then 6:30pm (5oz)
bed at 7pm and still there!!!

Usually he wakes between 10:30pm and midnight and again between 2am and 4am for feeds. Not too bothered yet about night time feeds being on schedule but wanting to get into the habit of a routine during the day and bath between 6pm and 7pm.

buzzgirly · 01/02/2012 22:41

Congratulations fryn

We had health visitor yesterday and ds is up to 8 pounds 9, which is reassuring that bf is working, was getting so anxious. As I was taking off his nappy, and telling her that the cord was still attached - it pinged off!

I also did not have the ideal birth, ended up with my 2nd emcs - seems neither of my children cope well with labour and their heart rate dropped dramatically both times. I was really keen on vbac with ds, but it wasn't to be. Had been feeling really crap about this, and then met a woman my DH works with who said "so you didn't manage it again, are you too posh to push hahah?" I just walked off, have barely spoken to her before - was so annoyed, why do people feel the need to pass comment on everything!

DS seems to only want to sleep in people's arms at the moment! Very tiring. Once he's asleep he's fine, but it's getting hin to settle that is the problem.

oeisha that sounds promising that she went on, hope it gets easier.

My dd has a sickness bug, she has been vomiting for the last 3 hours! No sleep tonight for me!

ParsleyLion1 · 01/02/2012 23:03

What a ridiculous thing for someone to say buzz.

Moobee · 02/02/2012 07:15

Congratulations Fryn! Thanks I'm goad your hone birth went well for you. :)

Buzz, I think I would have told that woman to fuck off, how rude.