April 2011-kicking back drinking lactulose cocktails and riding the maternity surfboards

[Petalouda]

Post-natal thread for all the antenatal April 2011 Family!

Share the birth stories, the baby blues and everything else.

Well I'm a horrid mummy and I don't feed every time M cries. I take the view he should be feeding approx evey 2-3 hours and taking a full feed each time. The couple of days I fed every time he cried web had green poo and lots of wind (too much foremilk because he just snacked) and I was full to the brim. Now I'm much more conscious that he might be wet/dirty/windy/hot/cold/overstimulated/touched out so I try other things before feeding and it works about 90% of the time. But saying G is gaining too much is a shit excuse and I wouldn't leave a 2 week old to cry. If they're crying it's because something is wrong!

DH also settles M much more easily than I do - M just smells the milk and goes beserk.

Frak - i agree, i don't feed M straight away when she squeaks depending on how long it's been since she fed.
At this age they do need loads of cuddles though and it would be just too mean to leave them to cry. I always remember someone saying something along the lines of: they've been cuddled inside you for 9months, so of course they expect/need it when they're out. (put better than that though!)

Oh I don't feed every time T cries. He hates to have a dirty nappy so that is first port of call, and cuddles, and then milk, unless it's been 3+ hours since a feed, in which case we do that first and attend to other things afterwards.
But you definitely don't leave a 2 week old to cry it out - obv. if you need the loo or whatever then you have to sometimes!

Oh ILike - you are exactly where I was when T was about a week old. I couldn't even read DS1 his bedtime stories without crying because I felt so guilty and mixed up about how things had changed.
I'm glad to say that a month on I have regained some semblance of rational thought , but I am very consciously enjoying the time I get with him in a way that I wasn't when I was pregnant and exhausted!!

I thought I'd share my 'why I'm glad I'm not pg anymore' thoughts I've been having:

Main one obv: baby is here :)

Main personal one: no more weeing at night, yey!

Others:

• hips & pelvis not sore anymore
• can reach my toenails
• can put socks on without running out of breath
• not running out of breath all the time, even doing nothing
• not getting stoopid comments about bump from random people all the time
• swelling going down (not that it was really bad but can't fit wedding ring on easily yet) so can wear rings again soon

Anything else?

Don't worry about the dummy Jen, H has had one on and off since he was two weeks and he's still crazy for the boob.

Don't beat yourself up over formula MrsW, I had to top up until the third week as my supply was low. I cried about it as I fell into the trap of 'This is not how it's meant to be, I want my PFB to be EBF, I'm a failure!'. My DP promptly told me I was being silly. After a couple of days of H not screaming like a banshee and me being able to take time over latching because he wasn't starving hungry I soon saw the light. It's hard but I'm sure whatever you do it'll be the best for baby xx

H was register this morning finally and we're off to get his passport application fast-tracked on Friday. He's a real person now!

Grr just wrote post and lost it!

Thinking about what the HV said perhaps I should try offering all the other things first and then feed as last option (unless he's been a long time between feeds anyway) It's difficult though as he's so persistant in his rooting!! I do wish they came with an instruction manual!

However he seems to be doing well and other than nighttime he's a very contented baby.

JKS was thinking about this the other day
Lying flat on my back is my personal favourite to get back.. it's so nice to lie down and pull the duvet up to my neck instead of having the sleep sitting upright like I did in pregnancy (couldnt breathe properly otherwise)

It does take a bit of getting used to not being pregnant anymore though. For the first few days I kept having that moment of panic when you realise you haven't felt any movement, and then remembering the baby wasn't in there anymore. Very weird!

I feel so much better after reading all your posts. I've been using nipple shields as well as too painful without after nipples got cracked. Also thinking about introducing a top up formula feed at night. As for dummy, we gave in at 7 days old and it's been a God-send. For anyone who's feeling guilty about the various things, don't we're only human and as long as our babies are happy and healthy that's what matters. My dh works shifts so I've had a tough few days trying to cope 24/7 by myself, anyone else in that position and has coping advice I'd welcome it.

Morning Ladies!! Day 5 now for me and Blair. We got home yesterday, but only after some formula feeding overnight on Monday after B sucked the skin off of one nipple after a slight change in latch for about 10 seconds, I was scared when he latched on ot lefty he would do the same to it. I was a bit upset when he did get the formula, but he was clearly starving. I still feel a bit sad, but he is still getting BM and that's the important thing. I got on the electric pump in hosp yesterday and got 80mls over 3 pumping sessions, so will keep up the expressing if the latching isn't working. Sometimes he latches like a king thent he next time takes ages and we both get stressed out. Some of the MW's on the ward were excellent when trying to get him latched and kept encouraging me. I have a good technique, B just need to realise this and work with me! One nursery nurse in particluar was a god send. She would sit with me for ages getting him latched. When she went off shift I missed her! She suggested that B might have a very slight tounge tie, and that might be the reason for the dodgy latching, but when the paed checked him she said no. Then when I spoke to the Infant feeding advisor she said he had a borderline tounge tie and if the problems continued she would get us referred to the clinic with a view to getting it snipped. Then last night when we were discharged on his notes from his initial check says he has a mild tounge tie . Anyone got eny experience of tounge ties? If the paed says no tie, and everyone else is saying slight tie, what do you do? DH had one when he was born and it was snipped, so it's not surprising if B does have one.

About expressing, I've just pumped 30ml by hand pump from both breasts and DH has given that to Blair when he woke up, but I can't keep manually pumping, my hands can't take it. Hopsital gave me details of where I can hire one of the hospital grade pumps that worked so well yesterday, do you think it would be worth hiring one for a month? That way he would be getting mostly BM and shold keep my supply up while we work out what the latching issue is. I do keep offering him boob and he did latch on to lefty last night first time and fed for about 15 minutes, then he seemed to forget to suck and lost it and wouldn't go back on.

Sorry this post is just a brain dump, if anyone can make sense of it i'd really appreciate any advice. i'm going to contact my BF peer supporter today too. Can't have too much advice with this I think.

Oh and unhelpful comment of the week from the MW discharging me, "you'll never get him to latch again after feeding him from a bottle". HOw else in gods name Am I menat to feed him?? She suggested a cup, which is fine, but really it would take all day to let him lap milk from a cup. I was already ignoring this particular MW after she continued to swaddle B even after i said he didn't like it and would scream as soon as she put him down. She said "Oooh you first timers think you know it all! All babies love being swaddled" . B llikes having his arms free, I knwo this because I am his mother. I'm over her now though!

Will come back later and hopefully pposst something slightly more coherent, with less typos and bad spelling!

Quick post because we have a busy morning here.

Lis - in your position I would hire the pump. Expressing is a time-consuming nightmare and anything which makes it easier should be embraced!!
Keep trying to latch him - can you try giving him just a little from the bottle and then latch him on once he isn't so hungry?

Beetle - I have breast thrush too. I'm so annoyed because I had it with DS1 too and it is bloody painful. I've started taking grapefruit seed extract tablets, and I'm washing all bras and nighties and bedding at 60 degrees. Change breast pads every feed and try and limit sugar in your diet and take an iron supplement.
If all that doesn't work, then go to your GP with this leaflet which outlines the treatment to clear it. When I had thrush with DS1, I needed 17 days straight treatment to get better.

Sassy - no experience but it sounds hard work :( The only advice I would give is to sleep whenever the baby is asleep and let everything else go to the wall a bit for now!

Lis I'd definitely hire a hospital grade pump if you're having trouble feeding and want to keep your supply up. Make sure it is a hospital grade one which is suitable for mutliple users though. If all is going well after a month you might want to consider buying as it can be cheaper in the long term than rental.

For alternative feeding methods try a syringe - I don't want to introduce a bottle just yet so have got a syringe in case of dire emergency. MW is talking rubbish though - you will be able to get him to latch after giving him a bottle. Plenty of people mixed feed! If you can keep your supply up you have ages to get the latch right. It's a learned skill...

Petal was it you with the lilypadz? How are you getting on with them? I have mine on for the first time today and they seem to be doing a better job of protecting my nips than the horrible disposable pads and no outline through clothes!

Another expressing question - actually a pump specific one. I have an Avent manual and yesterday it was extracting milk just fine from the breast but not delivering it down into the bottle.... Any ideas what the problem might be?

Also any words of wisdom on electric pumps? Worth getting a double electric if I'm going back to work in September and want to keep DS on BM?

DS has a nappy rash that chamomile tea won't shift. I know a red angry bottom can be a sign of thrush but we don't seem to have any other symptoms between us, although gettting him to open his mouth wide enough to see whether he has white patches is difficult!

Wel, G is lying in the cot watching the mobile go round and round, and Dd is happily playing nurseries and schools with her dolls. A brief period of peace in a very hectic morning, and not even been out of the house yet!

I think that the Breast Feeding Network info on breast thrush is excellent. I had nipple thrush with dd and it bloody hurt, fortunately it cleared up quickly with miconazole cream and miconazole oral gel for dd. I was lucky not to get deep seated breast thrush as I've heard its absolute agony.

Lis I've no experience of tongue ties, but I would go with the infant feeding advisors opinion. The paed dr may have only been a junior and I would think the feeding advisor probably has more experience and knowledge of tongue ties. I think it would be worth hiring a hospital grade pump if you had success with one whilst still at hospital. I was absolutely useless at expressing with dd it actually made me really sore, so this time I haven't even tried (well I actually don't even have a breast pump) I know this means that I will never get a break and DH can't give G a bottle of expressed milk but we will wait and see.

Frak I found bepanthen the best nappy cream, not sure if you can get it where you are. G is getting quite a sore bum around his anus due to frequent poos, even though I change him straight away. He poos about 8-10 times a day, maybe more! but its normal breast fed poo, bright yellow and grainy. Just really frequently.

JKS I too am enjoying being able to sleep on my back or side and turn over easily in bed now not pregnant anymore. Also I have stopped having to swig vast quantities of gaviscon, and can get in and out of the bath without huffing and puffing and feeling like a whale. However I know have a belly "like a deflated bouncy castle" according to DH and am still having to wear my maternity clothes. I would love to just ping back into shape but its not looking likely at the moment.

Yep that's what we have Jen - healthy BF poo but in vast amounts! No wonder the poor little poppet has a sore bottom.

Lisa Your MW is talking total crap about the nipple/teat confusion. You can switch between bottle and breast with no problems at all as they can't get confused at this age. The only point you might have issues with refusals is after six or so weeks - an exclusively breastfed baby might fuss to take a bottle after this point. However, you'd still be able to introduce one by persevering at each feed.

The nipple-teat confusion thing really annoys me as it's basically misinformation and always bandied about by midwives and health visitors. I fed my girls fifty different ways before each Friday (breast/formula in bottle/expressed milk in bottle) from the start and they never had any issues switching between the two. And the baby is being fed with either expressed breast milk in a bottle or directly from the breast without any issues. Do what you have to do and whatever works for you.

Beetle I've got nipple thrush too (joy!) - inevitable after the mammoth hit of antibiotics the baby had in hospital. He's got it in his mouth and basically passed it to my nipples. It was agonising for a few days when he latched on but is now improving. You need to treat yourself and the baby as otherwise you'll just cross infect one another again. We've got the oral gel (nystatin) for the baby and I've got Daktarin cream for my nipples and it does seem to be working. Not overnight though - I'm guessing we'll need to do this for at least two weeks as otherwise it will just flare up again and we'll be back to square one (which I can't bear). If you can look in the baby's mouth before a feed that will give you an idea of whether he has it. If there's a white coating an hour since the previous feed and you can't wipe it away with a cotton bud then it's thrush. Best to hit it with drugs too as it can move into your ducts which makes it more deep-rooted, harder to treat and (even more) painful. Oh it's all just joyous isn't it.

I'm bloody crippled at this end. Over three weeks since my caesarean and I can still hardly walk. One side of my stomach is very sore and tender - almost like a pulled muscle, which I think it what it is. I think I overdid it on my last night in hospital as the baby fed ALL night and did about 8 poos so I was up and down changing him. I remember twanging the side of my scar as I rolled out of bed and it has been painful since. I'm thoroughly fed up as it feels like it's going on forever and I'm never going to heal. I can't walk to the shops, chemist or the park with my daughters. I'm struggling with stairs (no fun as my house is four storeys) and I still can't walk my daughters to nursery. Oh and driving is not an option either. It's horrendous. This was why I wanted a VBAC!! Dealing with caesarean recovery with a newborn and four years olds is joke!

On the plus side the baby is a dream. I'm now feeding him every 3 1/2 to 4 hours as this way he guzzles down plenty of milk. It takes around 40 mins to an hour for each feed (with burps and swapping sides at the end) but it seems to be filling him up and he sleeps really well afterwards. He's also massively fat and greedy with jaws of steel, which has been a bit tricky with my uber-sensitive thrush nipples. None of it is for the faint-hearted I've decided.

Frak might be thrush on his bottom. If sudocreme doesn't shift it then it's a sign that it could be fungal. Have you tried breastmilk on it and letting it air dry for a bit? If that doesn't clear things then maybe try and antifungal cream - via your gp if you're not sure.

"ping back into shape" - yeah I wish! I always hoped i'd be one of those women people say you can hardly tell she's been pg, hahaha!!
At least i put on less weight with DD than with DS2 - and i still had most of the extra weight 6 months later when i finally gave myself a kick up the bum & we bought our Wii & i had my brother's wedding to plan for. I lost all the weight only to get pg again, lol.

Yes to hiring hosp pump if poss, they are meant to be the most efficient & hopefully you'll get the latch sorted and give it back :)
DS1 has a tongue tie, wish it had been snipped at birth but they don't here, grr (separate rant). it did stretch over time and feeding got less painful, and i carried on until he was 13months old so it's not the end of BF, just wish more people would recognise it & deal with it.

um, forgotten what else i was going to say, M was up for more feeds than usual in the night and i couldn't do my usual of going back to sleep this morning as we went out to register M this morning, all official now :)

Sassy - my DH works away most of the week usually, and i'm feeling a rising panic about next week....so not much help, lol!! But yes, try and let non-essentials slide and just go with the flow as much as poss.

i had a good day yesterday. DD is having a 3/4oz formula top up every 12 hours now and last night she slept 6 hours straight from 1am-7am in her moses basket . I also got her weighed at clinic yesterday and she's put on 10oz in a week

lis Regarding your MW comments about breast after bottle. DD had her top up at 11.30 last night she took 3oz of a 4oz bottle, winded her etc but she didn't settle, put her back on the breast and she was asleep within 15 minutes and has spent this morning guzzling my huge milky boobs after their 6 hour break.

Thanks guys, pump ordered and will be here tomorrow. I'm getting about 50mls every 3 hours using the hand pump and that's going right into B who seems quite happy with the arrangement. My milk seems to be coming in today! My boobs are huge. Jen I'll have a look at your friends website for nursing bras. I'm currently sporting nursing vests and although they are comfy, they're not very supportive.

Thos of you who have had sections I have a couple of questions. My wound is ring in the crease of my flabby lower tummy (nice I know!) The only way I can get air to it is to hoick up the flabby bit when I'm lying flat on my back. But doing this hurts like I'm over stretching it. What else can i do to "dry it" as MW yesterday said it was too wet looking and if I didn't do anything it would get infected, but she didn't offer any tips of what to do instead. And swollen ankles, hospital said this was normal, but how long should they take to deflate? I can't get any of my shoes on at all at the minute, even my fat pregnancy feet shoes are too tight!

B has been a gem today, not a peep from him at all, I'm bracing myself for when this will change! Off for a nap now, I bet as soon as I lie down the MW will appear!

Lis Can't help with scar issues but I had swollen feet before and after birth, they took a few days to go down properly and I'm now able to wear something other than flip flops! The mw that visited said it was normal and would go down and it did. Hope that reassures you a bit.

Lis - can you just pull it up a little to the point where it doesn't hurt? I was told to lie down and let mine air for 20 mins twice a day. I also used to pat it dry with clean kitchen paper, and then go over it with the cool setting on my hairdryer when I came out of the shower in the morning, and again after I had cleaned it at night.
It is a bit of a faff, but it does help. My scar got really infected with DS1, partly because I didn't bother with the faffing - I did this time and it was all healed up and totally closed within 3 weeks.

It took about 2 weeks for my feet to sort themselves out completely I think.

Lis I'm on antibiotics as I got a slight infection - it is clearing up now I think. I've been cleaning it 3 times a day, drying with kitchen roll as Ali suggests, though skipped the hairdryer as mine is either very warm or roasting. I am trying to air it by lying on my back but as my lochia has finished I'm also going commando around the house :o to try to help (obviously I have a long skirt on which doesn't hang near the scar). Fingers crossed the doc will say it's doing ok at my 6 week check on Monday.

M still hasn't poo-ed since Monday afternoon - I was researching last night and apparently the poo rate of breastfed babies drops off somewhere between weeks 4-6 - is this right? There was a tiny bit at this mornings nappy change and plenty of wee as she doesn't seem stressed at all do I need to worry?

We're trying gripe water today after another bout of screaming and vomiting after comfort sucking meant too much milk for tiny tummy.

I'm exhausted too as H slept for two hours at a time all night he's also been pooing repeatedly and it's like water so goes everywhere! He's been awake since 12 and it's now past 3, mummy wants a nap!

Lis I don't have the overhang but I would say if your scar is looking a bit wet then getting air to it as much as you can has to help. Just pull it back as far as you can in terms of tenderness. I'd also recommend making up some tea tree water - just put six or seven drops in some water and bathe it with cotton wool a few times a day and after each shower. It's antifungal and antiseptic and will help with healing. Make sure you change the cotton wool for each wipe/swab as this will help keep it clean. THen just blot it dry with kitchen paper. I'd avoid the hairdryer if you can - my consultant told me to look at the filter end of my hairdryer (had fluff and hair in it) and imagine that blowing against my scar. It was enough to put me off. Also, if you manage to have a bath, chuck several drops of tea tree and lavender in it as they're both antiseptic and antifungal. It all helps. Air drying will help, as will wearing cotton clothes and knickers as and when you can.

Also a big thumbs up to hiring a hospital pump - they clear your milk so much more quickly and effectively than hand expressing. I get all my milk off in 12 minutes which is just about bearable given how little time I have spare.

Lis the nurse at my docs also recommended using a cotton hanky on the scar in the overhang bit to keep it off skin to skin which would create a warm moist environment for infection. I wish I'd been more vigilant with it earlier. It took over a week before i was brave enough to even look at the scar.

Hey folks, hope everyone's well today.

Frak - Yep, I've got the Lilypadz, and they're amazing! Except I think I haven't looked after them properly because their 'stick' is a bit questionable now! I think I might have to be a bit more thorough in washing the next pair I buy (they are good enough that I'll buy a 2nd pair!), I might buy the wipes too. I do get a massive little reservoir of milk in them sometimes, which is tricky to release without soaking myself, but I presume that'll get better as my milk settles.

F's still got a bit of nappy rash too. We had gone to the dark side on to using wipes, but we're back to cotton wool & water, and using a spare nappy booster to dry him off, and then sudocrem (although I'll give the bepantham a crack too, thanks Jen!)

Kit & everyone else struggling with CS aftermath - sorry to hear you're still not feeling brilliant. Hope you start feeling better soon.

We finally made it to breastfeeding group today, and it was lovely! A lovely lady I'd very briefly met when we went with the antenatal group spotted me and made me feel very welcome! Had my latch checked, and it looks perfect, apparently, but F's still swallowing air! So the lady's taken the challenge and is going to see if she can work out why in time for next week!

In the meantime, I've remembered the reading I did about biological nurturing before he was born, and am going to give that a try - it should mean that his flailing & squirming will be more helpful, and I might get less backache too! (had a go earlier this evening, and he's now completely out for the count , with minimal screaming! I don't think he swallowed as much air as usual, either .)

Oh, and at breastfeeding group I learned that at around 6 weeks, breast fed babies often start to poo less often - some babies I met were pooing once a day, once every 4 days or even once a week! And it's apparently all normal! So that's something to look forward to!

Lochia Q - mine had all but finished, I thought. Then went to the loo and got totally freaked out by loads of dark red blood, with clots.
It seems to have calmed down again, a bit, not back to nothing yet though.

I have done lots today, registered DD, carrying her in her car seat, cafe for breakfast, more carrying in car seat, trip to town & wander round some shops, visit to DS1's sch to show off DD, then home.

Is it just doing too much all of a sudden that's re-started things?
Should I panic? or at least do something??
Anyone else had similar?

I should remember from the boys but I don't!

Had a bit of a crap day, but that's all on BF/FF thread so I won't rehash here.

Petal S has already started to poo less, we're usually every other day. Though today's was so 'impressive' we skipped the cotton wool, tried wipes, ended up with flannel squares and a bath!

JKS I had a similar rush of lochia the first couple of times I did any considerable walking even though it had tailed off.

Ali and others, thanks for the thrush info.

Interesting to hear the Lillypadz are working, the way I'm going through breast pads they may be a good investment!