March 2011 - we made it!

[Muser]

The waiting is over, the babies are arriving. March 2011 mums, come on in your time is up.

Hi ladies,
Congrats to all the new arrivals. Hope all is going well with everyone. Need to have a proper read through and catch up with what has been happening.

Just a note to anyone that had a C-section, keep an eye on your wound/scar... I had a bath on Weds pm and decided to have a close look at my scar - with the aid of a mirror due to the overhang I noticed that in 2 places it looked a bit red raw and like it was splitting!!!! Decided to get it checked out with GP yesterday and he said that i have a slight infection - luckily caught it early and am on antibiotics. Hopefully this should clear it up nicely!!

Hope all you mums and babies are well. x

Hi all,
Finally getting to post here :) if any of you saw my post on the antenatal thread, the gist is, DS arrived march 14 and is 2+ weeks now, feeding well and putting on weight (fingers crossed). We're lucky that the birth, BF and baby all went/are going smoothly.... because its been very very hard with DD being ill almost as soon as we got home :( she is only just recovering. But for a while there I was seriously regretting having had a second child :( Thank heavens DS has been such a calm contented baby so far (famous last words).

Honeymoonmummy I've got a little champion spit-upper here too, and its all down to him not being winded/burped after every single time he's been on the breast. Its probably cos he gasps and gulps and chomps while he feeds, swallowing a lot of air, or its something his mummy ate :o . IMHO your DS doesn't have reflux. I would reach for the Infacol not Gaviscon if you must. In our home, we've all got used to weary sleepless ages of patting DS in various positions after every feed, sigh.

Thought it was time to join you on the other side. Typing is much trickier holding a newborn, she is actually sleeping after falling asleep on my boob - I guess she had finished.

Nice to read your posts, it is very reassuring to know you're going through the same. When I came home on Saturday (Anya was born on Wednesday and I was kept in for my own health) I was in so much pain on one of my nipples where Anya had completely destroyed it. She had sucked constantly on the wrong part and my nipple just hurt so much that I couldn't bare the thought of her going back on that side. The MW in hospital suggested expressing to give my nipple a bit of time to heal. After 1 day of using the pump on that side it already felt better and she has been feeding from both since. Must admit though those of you who are doing every feed at the breast I'm quite impressed by. I managed it for a couple of days then found it too exhausting. Now I feed at the breast all day and express for her night-time feeds. I found that on the breast meant I was up for 2 hours as where with the expressed feed I'm only up for about 40 minutes which makes a hell of a difference when sleep deprived already.

I am also glad to hear that these "cluster feeds" are normal as I was so exhausted and worried there was something wrong with my milk when she did this the other night. Didn't realize I should be concerned if LO spits up parts of her feed - I thought this was just what babies did?

Sorry for the long post but have been too tired recently and I'm only just getting my energy back. I think I'm doing too much; I suffer with "cabin fever" too easily so always find an excuse to run errands. Today my errands were slightly more important though as they included registering her birth. :)

Purplefan I hope it all clears up quickly!

Thanks so much for sharing all your feeding stories, it really does help. I have cried a lot about giving up breastfeeding so early - we perhaps could have persevered but we are past the point of no return now, my supply is dwindling to almost nothing since we introduced formula, and I was dreading feeding him because of the nipple pain, as well as still being in general pain from the section and exhausted it was just too much to deal with for me.
Now we are exclusively on formula at least DH can do his share of the feeding (as can anyone else!) and I can relax a bit more, although I still feel really teary and guilty when Thomas turns his head towards my boobs when I am holding him and he is hungry. However, I know logically that he will still thrive, he is eating loads and putting on weight well, he is also going 4 hours between feeds at night time which means we can all get a bit of sleep.
I did have loads of help with breastfeeding from all sorts of people (BF specialists, midwives, nursery nurses, health visitor etc) and really do feel I gave it a good try, but at the end of the day it wasn't to be.

Afternoon all.

Bit of a quiet one today. DH back to work Sunday so trying to get everything ship shape at home although he is currently sleeping with Emir Am looking forward to him going back actually so that we can get into our own little routine and get out and about more.

E is doing well, being sick quite a bit still but we are trying to keep him as upright as possible during feeding and keeping him that way for a while after trying to burp him. I say trying because burping is a nightmare, he hardly ever does it and therefore suffers with hiccups.

Love to all and have a great weekend if I dont get on.

superpenguin - just read your post - very similar to what I've just posted on our other thread - see below - I've copied it over. Like you, I had a c-section too and then the mastitis and an infection just made me so poorly we made the decision to switch to formula. Don't be too hard on yourself babe xxx

(Larty74 I feel your pain. To be honest I had already made up my mind that I wasn't going to be 'bullied' by the breastfeeding police (!) and that even if I only managed one bf that would be better than nothing. It was great for the 3 days I was in hospital as all I had to do was press my buzzer and a nurse would appear in seconds and assist with the latch back on. In reality back at home at 3 am with no help and bleeding nipples its a different story. At 5 am when I finally got into bed (when the bloody birds were singing!), I was lying there dreading the next feed. My advice is to be proud of what you have achieved and just do what suits you best. Imogen, at a week old is absolutely fine on formula, takes 4oz every 4 hours (almost to the minute!) and sleeps like a dream in between. Its also nice that DH gets to feed her and even DS(5) likes to help too. My antibiotics are doing the trick, boobs are still sore though, and nipple scabs are nearly ready to drop off!)

just have a spare few minutes to write on here now, Angus was 2 weeks old yesterday and for the past week I just can't stop crying, is anyone else still feeling like this? I know I should be so happy, he was a really wanted baby and I had a great pregnancy, bf is going ok-ish (he falls asleep after 5-10 mins so hard getting him to take a proper full feed).
I just feel complete and utter despair and can't quite explain why, I just am crying all the time and finding it hard to sleep, feel like i want to run away or crawl into a dark corner and stay there. Feel so so guilty for feeling like this which just makes it worse. Health visitor says this is completely normal and part of the whole baby blues / fluctuating hormones thing, so I was just wondering if anyone else feels the same?
Absolutely dreading my DP going back to work next week, not sure I can cope by myself.
Sorry I don't know who I'm supposed to talk to about this, I know everyone else has problems of their own as well.

highland - i cry about most things at the moment, including things I think might happen (like people interferring etc) and I cry about that even though it isnt actually happening or real. We are two weeks in as well so I think for the moment your HV may be right. Keep an eye on it though. If it still persists in a few weeks then mention it again and if you get the same answer and dont feel happy then go to the GP.

Aww Highland you poor thing, its not nice at all. For what its worth, I had baby blues on and off for about 6 weeks with DD1, and luckily only about 2 weeks this time. In my experience though, it very much 'felt' hormonal, crying for no reason, then happy as Larry 5 minutes later, then dreadful guilt later on. I really did feel like I was up and down like a rollercoaster. I didnt ever feel 'complete and utter despair' or or wanting to 'run away into a dark corner'. This does sound quite severe and I hope you are getting some of the highs as well as the lows.

I think the difference this time round has been that I've HAD to get on with things normally as have an almost 4yo DD, so no time to dwell at all.
Also I have a much better support network this time, and I seem to remember you are out in the sticks a bit, so adult company is probably in short supply.

The only advice I can really give is that when your DH goes back to work, you get plenty of rest, dont try to do everything, also get outside for a walk or some other adult company EVERY SINGLE DAY or you will go crazy! They are called sanity breaks for a reason...

Give it another week and speak to your HV again if no improvement, it is not good for you to feel this way day in and day out.

Please dont worry about off-loading on here, thats what we're all here for!!

Hope you feel happier soon, and keep in touch. (((((Hugs)))))

Oh, meant to say, as long as Angus is putting his weight on ok, dont worry about the short feeds, I am the same, Bethany feeds for 5 or so minutes and that is all that is needed to empty my boobs- fast let down! Not all babies need 40 minutes at the boob (thank God!!)

Hi ladies it seems we are all thinking the same thing, where does the time go and how can a tiny thing take up so much of it when all they do is eat and sleep!!! Highland cassie has only ever really fed for a maximum of 15 mins, mostly just 10 mins , every 3hrs during the day and every 4 hrs between 7pm and 7am, she put on 14oz in one week so really don't worry!!!
i think she may have tongue tie so am going to have her checked next week at my 6 week appt, OMG can't believe she will be that old next week!! my scar is still numb and feels weird!! Not a very descriptive word but the best i can come up with!! Anyone elses feel like they can't bear any kind of material rubbing on it???
I am going to try dream feeding Cassie from a bottle tonight, i expressed 4oz this afternoon and am interested to see if it will eek her out for an extra couple of hrs!! She currently does 7pm then anywhere between 11-12am then again 3-4am then 7am, so her longest stretch is early evening which obviously i don't benefit from sleepwise so my theory is if she has an extra feed at 10.30- 11ish she may sleep longer!!! i will let you know!!!
also does anyone else think that a manual breat pump is actually faster that the electric ones?? It took me 15 mins for the first 2oz with the electric pump then about 5 mins second 2oz with the manual one!
Well, that was a long post, makes up for the many times i have been on and read but not had time to post!!
Its only 9.45pm and got another hour to wait before i feed Cassie, i don't know if i will stay awake!!
Have a good weekend ladies and hang in there!!!!

thank you so much for the replies, thankfully am experiencing some highs, the first few days I felt amazing and I'm not too bad in the mornings, especially when he is awake and alert and I can chat away to him, and I love feeding him myself, although it is a struggle. I manage to get him to stay awake for a maximum of 10 mins at a time feeding, so in the night he'll feed on and off between 1am and 5am, so def not getting enough sleep (averaging about 4 hours a night I think, and find it impossible to sleep in the day), its just late afternoon / early evening something seems to kick in and thats when I feel awful, there isn't even a rational / irrational reason for my crying / feeling down it just sort of takes over and I can't stop. I know I have so many things to be grateful for which makes me feel overwhelming guilt, my OH is amazing, he has been doing everything round the house as well as trying his best to keep my spirits up. Find myself dreading the night time.....
Anyway, glad to hear other babies only feed for a short time too, my HV was horrified that he feeds for such a short time and thinks he should be feeding for 40 mins at a time, but he has gone from 8lb 7oz birthweight to 9lb 13oz at 2 weeks and a day old so something must be working somewhere? Feels like night is day to him at the moment, I'm sure all of this is normal I'm just creating a drama.
Sorry for the long post again, feels good to have some sort of outlet. And sittinghippo I think you're right about needing to get out, its just taking some time for me to heal physically which is why I've been struggling to get outdoors, and being in the sticks makes it hard to visit people but I'll just have to make the effort to force myself out next week I think. Sorry again for the self centred post, sounds like everyone has their problems in the first few weeks.

If he's gaining well that's a good sign. You could speak to a bf counsellor if you're worried, maybe get your latch checked just to reassure yourself? I go to a feeding cafe and that's great for getting expert advice, meeting people and eating cake!

When my girl struggled to stay awake during feeds we would strip her down to her vest or nappy to help and do lots of arm rubbing/feet tickling and similar. If you could get her to feed for longer she might feed less frequently and give you a bit more rest.

Highland, big hugs to you. With a weight gain like that I REALLY wouldn't worry, it sounds like you're one of the lucky ones whose LO feeds quickly [looks down scathingly at son who has been grazing for an hour]

I didn't have major mood swings in first few weeks but I did have PND last time about 6 months after birth so I know a little of what you're feeling. It is absolutely normal and so common and please don't beat yourself up about it. If you do feel you need to do something about it, please go and see your doctor xxx

DS is still vomiting after feeds but I'm just going to play it be ear and see how it develops. Definitely very impt to wind properly which I'm religious about but it seems a bit more than excess milk, esp when he's sick an hour after feed - time will tell.

superpenguin I know just how you feel! my story couldn't be more similar to yours/chickies Life is to short to be that miserable - I say let's get on with healing and enjoying our LO's!

Hi all, its scary and overwhelming to be on this side isn't it? 4 days in and very up and down. Currently up after a nap with fish and chips in the oven for tea. Back to bed at 10 as I have a feeling we will be in for a long night.

After 2 days of barely feeding Hannah seems to have picked things up. She is due her 5 day weigh tomorrow and am terrified she will have lost too much. MW came today and seemed happy with her but the worry is constant isn't it.

Milk came in today and my breasts are enormous. Struggling to get the latch especially with swollen breasts but trying to keep going. MW helped today with postioning and will no doubt be helping me tomorrow. I find she gets so upset I sometimes let her stay latched on through the pain which I know I shouldn't. Plus its so hard to get them off. I hope one day this latching becomes straightforward as its constant struggle atm.

Could I ask if any other bfing mums are considering co sleeping? My MW said we could do it (I thought the NHS frowned upon it?) DP isn't keen, neither is my mum - she did it but had a close shave with my dad nearly rolling onto my sister (although she woke to stop it)

Anyway I'm not sure i'm confident enough but wanted to ask others about it. Last night (first night home) she would feed, sleep but then wake up the second we put her back in the basket. Any tips for getting her to settle? Its possible I hadn't fed enough so tonight i'm going to keep her awake whilst feeding rather than letting her fall asleep at the boob too easily. One day at a time.

You could try putting a hot water bottle in the basket to keep it warm. That way the basket is less of a shock as it's nice and toasty warm. You could also try swaddling.

Hi folks
I can recommend going outside even if it is the garden or to the end of the road.
Got my midwife discharge appointment on the 4th but have a feeling we will need a hospital appointment due to prolonged jaundice. I'm not too worried as it is a family trait (DS1 took 6 weeks to lose it).
I found the first week BFing the hardest but everyday you do it is a bonus. it was definitely harder the first time round especially when the milk came in. I forgot that your armpits also swell up when the milk comes in!

I'm on the other side! Hey everyone. I've posted my birth story on the pre-natal March thread but basically had Lara Jean yesterday morning, 90 seconds after entering the hospital. Her head was out in the lift...! DS1 very taken with her but is especially fascinated by her car seat. Boys!!!

I'll try to post more tomorrow as she's just stirring for another feed now, but wanted to say about the co-sleeping, I'm not even thinking twice about it this time for the first few weeks - if it gets me more sleep then I'm doing it!! Worried about it dreadfully with DS1 and always felt like a failure when he wouldn't settle in the bloody moses basket. Wanted to throw the damn thing out of the window after the first month! But really it doesn't form bad habits - they don't seem to remember a thing from the first few weeks. I slept with DS1 in our bed most nights for at least the first month and by 3 months he was fine in the cot all night with between 1 and 3 feeds a night. Anyway that's just my tuppence worth.

Off to bed now - will post more tomorrow, love to you all xxxxxxxx

PS Obviously with the safety issue on co-sleeping I advocate all the relevant advice re: not in a smokers house, etc etc!

I'm with lozario on the co- sleeping, DH has been sleeping on the couch downstairs for the last week while I co-slept with DS. He's just started settling in Moses. I second trying hot water bottle, also put an item of clothing of yours under the sheet, pref recently worn, so it smells of you. I never got DD to settle in Moses, ended up gettin her in cot at about 1 month, she slept right through the first night in it and we never looked back!!

Also re co-sleeping, I just have the duvet up to my waist then wear a jumper and a baby blanket over my upper half so can't pull duvet over LO as I sleep

Highland, I hope you're feeling slightly better this evening. I find I'm very emotional some days and even looking at my beautiful daughter can set me off in tears with a feeling of being completely overwhelmed. I'm sure lots of people have said this to you already but good sleep will make you feel much better. Maybe try going straight back to bed in the morning rather than getting up after the first morning feed.

Sam I've not used a manual pump but I have noticed that my milk comes faster after a while with my electric one. This evening the first 2 oz was really slow and then next time I looked I was surprised to see the bottle full (5oz). Looking forward to your report back on how this works for you. My LO has her night feeds expressed but I find no matter how much I give her she always wants a little bit more preferably from the breast before she'll go back to sleep. I think it might be a comfort thing as quite often she will just suck for 5 minutes and doze off.

Honeymoon this morning my LO was quite sick too, it reminded me of your post from yesterday as it had the consistency of sour milk. There was also an awful lot of it. She was cuddled in bed with me after she had fallen asleep after her feed half an hour earlier and she was sick - didn't even wake up but covered quite a bit of my bed and me :( Expecting MW tomorrow, will ask about it then.

Anyway - time to enjoy some adult time. OH and I about to watch a DVD together while Anya sleeps soundly on my belly :)

RE: co-sleeping - I haven't intentionally done this but Anya sometimes only settles when she's with me and at 5:30am it is easy to let her win and leave her settled with me.

Hi everyone,

Finally checking in on this thread. I've been having a rough recovery from an emcs (wound reopened and landed me in hospital for four days last weekend; I posted my harrowing birth story on the prenatal thread). purplefan, hope you are healing well from your similar experience. Sounds like you caught it just in time.

Baby is doing is great, which is the important thing. She's two weeks old today, feeding like a little monster and putting on weight.

Breastfeeding is going well, though baby wants to eat all the time. I think much of it is just a desire to suck. We gave her a dummy for a couple of hours yesterday just to see if it would settle her, and it did. I don't want to overuse it, though, and have her become too dependent. (Anyone else worrying about forming bad habits so early?) She's been spitting up a lot after feeding, which makes me wonder if she's eating too much because she just wants to suckle and will happily spend hours latched on.

Is anyone exclusively breastfeeding and alternating with expressed milk in bottles? Are your babies adapting well? Midwives all recommended not introducing bottles for the first six weeks, but it would be nice to be able to let my husband feed her -- or his parents when they visit later this month. I don't have anywhere to go, however, so don't really have a problem carrying on as I've been doing for a few more weeks. Any thoughts or concerns about "nipple confusion"?

Hope everyone is enjoying their babies and having a lovely mother's day.