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Sept 08 - No no no, ME do it!

999 replies

CappuccinoCarrie · 11/12/2010 13:30

Shiny new thread for Christmas!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Meglet · 28/02/2011 20:32

bookmarking...

eandz · 01/03/2011 08:43

Morning everyone!

I have no idea what a safe place is for N to just run around.

Our flat is half the size of a normal shoebox, outside there is traffic. Museums and malls are full of strangers.

on a weird note, my feet are really cold and they've been cold for a few days now. I'm not sick, the heating is on --I'm walking plenty but the coldness is really painful! (oh, and i'm wearing crazy furry-fuzzy-socks)

Becaroooo · 01/03/2011 08:55

eandz Do you have raynauds???? I do and always have cold feet and hands....so bad I have to wear gloves at the supermarket to get stuff out of the freezer section!!!

mrsa What do you mean "anti-rein brigade"???? didnt know such a thing existed!!! Shock I have no problem with them at all and dont use them myself (but only becuase both my dc are budding houdini's and can get them off!!) Surely its better for a child to have reins on than run into traffic????? You do what you need to so to keep your child safe.

Toby is not too bad with roads per se...he holds hands and says "quickly...cars!" Smile BUT his fave thing atm is running off when we leave anywhere (like our house, my MILs or my mums) and I have to chase him to catch him and get him into the car! VERY annoying! and I get funny looks too as I am chasing him around but I dont give a monkeys! Grin

I keep telling myself that, at this age, our LOs are pushing the boundaries we set and exploring their abilities and emotions and trying to make sense of their little world.....and that means lots of hard work for us!

Lots of ironing and housework to do today....ds1's 1st parents evening at his new school this evening...why am I sooo nervous?????????? Hmm

eandz · 01/03/2011 09:13

Becaroooo

don't have raynauds, but I do have rheumatoid arthritis as a result of my stills disease. maybe this cold feet thing is yet another new symptom of turning old.

good luck with ironing! we're still in laundry mountain range.

Becaroooo · 01/03/2011 09:16

eandz Oh nasty...RA sucks. Am wondering whether I may have it (very mildly) but am too chikcen to go and get it checked out!!! Blush

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 01/03/2011 09:59

Oh poor u eandz My feet and hands can get cold, not as bad as yours sounds though.
Have you thought about acupuncture? I'm doing it atm and she talks about balancimg energies to remove 'damp' and help cold feet.

becs I get looks from people who think reins are like walking a dog and C should learn to behave.

And on my 6th 2ww ladies, though my mind may be elsewhere as I found a lump in my armpit this morning. Got docs appt later today. Am bricking it.

Keep your fingers crossed!

Debs75 · 01/03/2011 11:16

Thanks ILTMIMI will try that next time.

Eandz I get cold feet but then I don't like wearing socks so it is my own fault. I don't really mind them being cold but I hate cold floors

eandz · 01/03/2011 11:29

mrsa
i do love acupuncture! i go about once a week :) just thinking about it makes me happy. one hour of pure quiet, who cares if someone is poking me with needles. :p

funny thing is, it's not my hands. just my feet. oh well. all a part of growing up.

becaroo will the raynauds make your hands/feet more painful if you do have RA? there are a few new drugs that help with RA (unfortunately for me, my body won't accept them).

debs cold floors + cold toilet seat first thing in the am...instant panic attack!

digitalgirl · 01/03/2011 11:40

oh mrsa not you too with the lump! Hope it is as pacita's was, a lump and nothing more. (and fingers crossed for 2ww too)

eandz playground at the park? The one's that are gated so they can't run out of them without putting serious effort into opening the gate. Or are you near any indoor play places?

bec good luck with the parents evening tonight.

eandz · 01/03/2011 12:11

mrsa
sorry didn't see your last line, I'm sorry you've found a lump, hopefully it's just a swollen lymph node from the last time you were sick and all you have to do is massage it! (happens to me every time I get a cold).

digitalgirl our closest playground park is in the cemetery. It gives me the creeps. But we go, I still have him harnessed though. Those gates are always opening and closing.

pacita · 01/03/2011 12:27

Hello ladies, I read you on a constant basis while I feed, but this time I've swiftly deposited a sleeping Ines on the sofa to post, as it's generally too complicated to reply one handed!

First of all, MrsA, I was bricking it with my lump too. Chances are it's absolutely nothing, but let me tell you, hearing someone telling you is the best medicine. Get your GP to refer you for a mammogram/ultrasound right away. My GP was a bit "let's wait and see", but quite frankly, who wants to wait and see? Thinking of you. Be assertive.

hopefully, I totally understand your heartache when you leave T crying at nursery. Funnily enough, I'm back at that stage with Diego. After over a year of going to nursery quite happily, he is now screaming when left. It apparently does not last too long, but it makes me leave with wobbly knees and a guilty conscience. I think it is one more symptom since the arrival of little sister. Which is why I'd say you need to persevere now, so that when the baby comes you can actually have the option to leave him in care without him feeling banished. You will need some respite in the form of childcare when the little one is here (if you are anything like me!). The truth is that he is always happy and playing when I go to get him, and that he LOVES being with other children and doing the nice activities that they prepare at the nursery.

Debs, you were asking how Ines is doing, and the answer is great, she's a chilled baby, she's putting on weight, has started beaming huge smiles... The only problem is that she's one of those hard to wind babies, which means I can easily spend ALL NIGHT awake trying to exhort one burp or a pesky fart to exit her body. I am exhausted, and would love to hear of any of your tips to efficiently wind and burp babies. She really seems to be very uncomfortable, writhes and goes red in the face and brings up her knees.

On top of this, if she happens to have a relatively good night (e.g. i get 2 or 3 hours sleep in a row - never more), Diego is sure to wake up and need comforting. DP has been doing it, but I will still wake up. All in all, I am utterly sleep deprived and find it quite depressing that a child who slept through and self settled since he was little is now requiring this degree of comfort and even getting up for the day as early as 5:30 some mornings. We are giving him so much love and reassurance, and DP is a gem, playing with him, sitting by his bed at night, doing lots of explaining and cuddling... He is getting better, but I really, really would like to know what to do for him to go back to sleeping through and waking up at a reasonable hour, so that we can all function. I am also conscious that as days get lighter, this is going to be even more difficult to achieve!

eandz nice to see you again. I think your DS sounds like he's got a great personality! I think pre-teen strops, throwing and running away are all part and parcel of kids this age. I guess if nothing else, it will help keep us fit (or perhaps I'm deceiving myself).

Starlight, really glad your dad is better. Such a great turn around from last time I read your thread, when it all looked very bleak. How is your mum coping? And I agree that once you are not under such stress, conception will be a lot easier. Also, hoping you get the support you were promised for your DS.

Finally, digi, I am so happy for you and that little bean. Like Hopefully said, when they are so little, a 2 pixel click may make a huge difference. Try not to worry.

Apologies for the humongous post. I guess I'm making up for the extended lurking!

Becaroooo · 01/03/2011 13:13

mrsa I used to get enlarged lymph nodes after illness...very scary...I used to get them in my armpits and on my shoulders/neck area. They were pea sized and quite hard. Good luck at the GPs x

pacita I am sure D is reacting to the changes at home....he is probably really happy at nursery once you have done the drop off. Ds1 went through a phase of wanting to come into out bed when Toby was a baby (we co-slept for feeding) and it was a tad snug in there Smile

dg I have all the scan pics of Toby from 6 weeks (viability scan) to 39 weeks Smile Its amazing to look at them now....

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 01/03/2011 17:04

Well, I saw GP who ummed and ahhed and pressed and prodded and he decided it is probably a lymph node infection (possibly from shaving Blush). I recall having one of these lumps on my fanjo years ago from an ingrowing pube .

I am a course of abs for 2 weeks and have to come back to see him then to check its gone away.

Unlike zena warrior princess pacita I was not assertive and did not insist on a mammogram.
I did ask him whether I could take the abs if pg (they are penecillin (sp?)) and he said 'well, you're not pg'. And I said well, I might be. AF is due in a week. He said 'well you're not now though. If af doesn't arrive stop taking the abs!'.
Not too reassured.

But anyway, we'll see.

Thanks for all the messages and Pacita you sound a bit more upbeat, despite sleep deprevation so hang in there. Before you know it, you'll be pushing the pram through the daffodils and spring sunshine!

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 01/03/2011 17:09

Just realised my comments sound totally flippant Pacita, sorry.

Have you tried the usual infacol/colic drops etc?

C had terrible colic from wk 2 to 12. We cured it by putting her to sleep on her tummy. On her back she would wake in pain and wouldn;t settle. I know it's not the done thing but it worked for us and she still sleeps like that now. For the first week or so, I watched her like a hawk though.

Diego is big enough to know he will get attention when he wakes up and he probably wants it now cos you're so busy with Ines. No easy solution (although it will work out, you know that) - others with more than one will have advice I'm sure. FannyP where are you?!!

DebiTheScot · 01/03/2011 18:27

Uh oh ds1 has found the 'Mummy laid an egg' book and wants it at bedtime! He's never read it & hasn't asked any questions before about where babies come from! Someone gave it to me as a secret Santa present when I was pg with him!

Hopefully your doc is right MrsA. Sounds like he was a bit blunt but I guess what he meant was that if you are pg you're only just and so embryo wouldn't get anything passed to it from you yet.

Becaroooo · 01/03/2011 18:33

debi I love that book!!! We read it alot when I was expecting Toby. The illustrations crack me up Smile

Meglet · 01/03/2011 18:46

MrsA bollocks to the anti-rein brigade (excuse my language Blush. My two are bolters so even 4yo DS sometimes has reins on him when we're out and about, although they do both have the rucksack reins which look a bit more grown up.

CappuccinoCarrie · 01/03/2011 18:50

mrsa really hope the abs kick in soon and you're better well before the 2ww is up.
pacita I have no advice at all, only idea is could you express off a little foremilk? I remember that gulping a lot of foremilk can give them wind, whereas if you express off a bit then they get proportionally more hink milk and not quite such a blast of milk in the first few sucks. But I admit I don't know a right lot about bf...!
Had our scan yesterday, there really is a baby, and I was measuring 15+4. Tomorrow is my birthday so it really is a week of eating too much celebration Grin

OP posts:
Hopefully · 01/03/2011 20:42

Thanks so much for your messages of support everyone, it's really made me feel better. I took T into nursery today and asked the manager for a chat (then promptly burst into tears on her, which I think was entirely adult and appropriate behaviour and not at all due to being 35 weeks PG...). She was very supportive, very realistic (didn't try to pretend it was all fine and that he'd get over it) and we came up with a bit of an action plan. The thing he struggles with most is the 1 hour of compulsory being inside (the rest of the time they can go in and out of the garden as they please), so we've decided that for tomorrow and next Monday he will only do 2 hours, for the first I will go in and sit with him during the inside time, then leave him (either sit in reception or actually leave, depending on how confident we're all feeling!) for an hour while he goes in the garden. We did this today (although only left for 30 mins while he was in the garden) and although he cried a bit less when I left, he calmed down really quickly (I watched through the window) and was even kind of playing with another little boy when I came back.

Personally, I've decided that we'll give it till I'm 38 weeks (so 3 weeks more), and if I'm not able to leave him happily for at least part of the inside time, we'll abandon it then. I just cannot think of coping with a newborn while he's so stressed, I'd rather have the stress of looking after him myself if that's the case!

Weirdly, one of the things that seemed to help was telling him that I had to go and do a task, rather than that I was just 'leaving'. Apparently Mummy needing to go to the shop to buy bananas is much more acceptable than Mummy needing to just abandon him. He was very pleased with banana (yes, I had to go an actually buy one) and kept telling everyone that Mummy had had to go shopping to buy a banana.

It's all making me so relieved that we went with a really small, friendly Montessori nursery (not that the Montessori bit is terribly relevant) -I just feel comfortable that they're happy to spend the time working this through, and that it's quiet enough (never more than 20-25 kids there at a time) that he won't get totally stunned into silence and just not ask for help if he's scared. Anyway, fingers crossed it will work out.

reins I'm not the biggest fan in the world, but then I'm able to be, since T is not a runner in any way. A friend has a kid that runs off and he would have been run over a dozen times without reins. The only time I don't like seeing them is when parents are using them instead of talking to their kids and getting them into good habits crossing the road etc, but when they're this age I think it's more about survival than teaching road sense - that can come some time in the future. I don't think there's any better option if you've got a runaway kid, apart from moving to the middle of a big empty field!

MrsA even if you are PG this month, the egg/sperm combo doesn't get anything from your blood supply for a week or two anyway (I read up on this because I was taking a steroid nasal spray when TTC T), until there's some form of placenta and it's attached to your uterus wall, so there's plenty of time for Abs to work their way out of your system if you get a BFP (fingers crossed!)

Eandz I have the coldest feet ever, but they don't get painful. The only time they are warm is when I am PG, for some reason (extra blood supply?). I reckon it's down to years of stone floors and a refusal to wear slippers when I was a kid, but I think I might also have v v v mild circulation probs - I get super cold hands, feet and ears in winter, and had to keep my boobs warm when I was BFing or they got really sore!

DebiTheScot · 01/03/2011 22:11

Hopefully your banana story reminded me that I did something similar with ds1 when he started pre-schl. He wasn't too bad but had a couple of wobbly mornings (he's been at a childminder for 2 years by then so was generally ok) and I did something similar. Told him I had to go and buy chocolate for him and I'd be back soon. I seem to remember it worked well!

Grin and Smile Carrie I'm having a Wine to celebrate with you. You can have a St Davids instead Grin

Meglet · 01/03/2011 23:21

Can I just annouce how pleased I am with my thrifty culinary skills this evening. I made bubble & squeak with the leftovers from the weekends roast dinner. Mashed it all up, added egg and cheese to bind, made 4 little 'patties' and fried them up for a few minutes. It's like rationing has arrived in my house Grin.

hopefully It sounds positive if the nursery are happy to work with you to try and get T settled. I do hope it works out Smile.

eandz · 02/03/2011 09:08

hopefully bf made my boobs hot. I couldn't stand it! I would find myself buying iced drinks just to place them against my chest. I think I heard somewhere that if you keep your boobs cold, they don't sag as much as you age. I've been putting my feet on DH's tummy when he gets home since it's his warmest area. This is a behavior N has picked up. He puts his feet on the tummy of his stuffed parrot. DH thinks my crazy is rubbing off on N.

I'm waiting to hear back from nurseries today, I'm still not sure if it's a good time to send N or not. Eh, a few hours to myself wouldn't hurt though.

DebiTheScot · 02/03/2011 09:34

meglet well done. I'm impressed. And since we're showing off I'll tell you about my stretching too. I had a £2 off if you spend more than £8 on tesco finest chicken voucher so I got a decent sized free range chicken for £6 (said it serves 6) and we've had roast chicken, chicken and pasta and today we're hving chicken pie. Have also made soup and there was even enough left for a couple of sandwiches. That's 1 more meal than I normally get out of it so I was quite pleased!

Becaroooo · 02/03/2011 10:01

Very impressed at all the thriftiness....I did an onion and courgettte frittata last night for me and dh. yum.

Ds1s parents evening went well...he is well behaved and has settled in nicely. He is still quite behind with his reading and writing though Sad He is making progress albeit very, very slowly.....just dont know what else to do.

I am wondering whether I have to accept that ds1 has a non-specific learning disability (although he has been assessed by the school SENCO and she had "no concerns")

Perhaps some kids just never read or write well?

His teacher has given me the website for the phonics site they use at school so we will start to use that.

Hey, he's happy and I guess thats what I should be focussing on! Smile

eandz · 02/03/2011 13:26

becaroo

My husband didn't know his alphabet till he was 11. He's doing okay now though.