Liberal Christian at sea with evangelical church

[overwhelmed2023]

I am part of a home group connected to an evangelical Christian church. I thought at first , having been at Baptist and C of E churches previously, that due to the relaxed nature of the meetings, it was fairly relaxed.
However I'm realising that noisy meetings, free prayer, guitar playing in worship songs etc aside, the church is quite conservative/ extreme in views on abortion, marriage, homosexuality, trans issues , feminism and now Im wondering whether to leave. I believe the Bible can be read in context and with some interpretation and this seems at odds with their views. Some things make me feel really angry, other things just seem really off the wall and I feel out on a limb and as if I'm not a ' real' believer.
Can anyone relate or help ??

Being a disciple of Jesus is full of challenges, every day. Challenges come from external sources, especially from living in a secular world. They come from keeping our gaze focussed on others rather than on God. They also from within ourselves and our innate desire to do things our own way.

Rhetorical questions for you to ponder:
Who are you angry at? What is it that you believe 'in'? Who is judging you as not a 'real' believer in whatever it is you believe? Why do you care?God's guidelines for leading a Christian life are clear; could it be your 'ego' that is railing against a strict parent on some things that don't fit in with a secular world view? How are you weighing/measuring 'some interpretation'? Where does that come from?

Ah well I'm angry at the rigidity of views which I think are the opposite of what Jesus showed us - sticking up go the oppressed and vulnerable

I suppose I feel so lead a Christian life yes and with the Holy Spirit but some of the views expressed seem bigoted and although the Bible may say especially in the OT that certain things are sinful, Jesus came and showed us fairness and tolerance and turned things the right way uo.

If you don't feel at home in your current church there's no harm in looking for a new one. There's some good advice on this thread, if you ignore the homophobic nonsense spouted by the previous poster and others.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/philosophy_religion_spirituality/4921835-anyone-feel-like-theyve-joined-a-cult-christian-perspective-please

Thanks crimson will have a look later :)

I'd get out if I were you. It won't get any better. I've been in those environments and it was ghastly.

To cut a long story short, though, I was abused horrendously badly by charismatic evangelicals, and now I can't go anywhere near a church of any kind without having a panic attack.

What happened? Out of curiosity? I was thinking of joining an evangelical church nearby. Now you have me curious.

I would definitely say leave and find another church. A church that promotes intolerance and its own narrow interpretation of the rules sounds like one to skip.

Agreed that 'loose' presentational style has nothing to do with the theology involved.

Anyone see he gist of what / why was deleted?

Yes feel I should note down my thoughts on
Homosexuality/ same sec attraction relationships and blessings
Same on transgender
Same in abortion
Then think what it actually says in the Bible then ask the leaders the church and personal stance

Here's a thought - I bet these people love 'Bible study', but do they actually seriously study the Bible? Why are they so certain that the particular translation of various (inconsistent and historically inaccurate) documents assembled over centuries that they happen to use is 'the word of God?'. Why do they place great weight on some parts but ignore others?

So many 'relaxed' churches are actually fundie light or full on fundie. Nothing relaxed about that, especially for women.

Absolutely. I spent my year out in a charismatic church that was well into leaders in jeans and t-shirts, rock band worship and "cultural relevance". They were brutally uncompromising in terms of theology and outlook and made really excessive demands of members.

Yes I have attended one and did not stay. I now attend CoE but low rather than high church. If you are uncomfortable about fundamentals then it makes sense to try a different church. It is totally ok to speak to churches at an early stage or even phone their office to find out their approach on some of these issues before attending.

For example, I feel that women should be allowed in ministry and that women being excluded is a mistaken understanding of Paul's letters in the historical context. But this is obviously not accepted by many evangelical independent churches. I fully understand and respect that, but it isn't for me.

You won't know the stance of a church until you ask... and some churches are tolerant of different interpretations and views within the congregation in a way they others might not.

Oh please walk away - right now. Do not agonise over it - just recognise them for what they are and dissociate yourself from them.

Heaven knows we are watching the evil of fundamentalism played out internationally right now and it stinks.

If you cannot find a church that you feel comfortable in, just live your life ruled by the doctrine of kindness.

Not sure I could stick that OP. I'd like to think I'd protest, but realistically would probably be a Paddington Bear hard stare in true British fashion.

The Bible is pretty skewed on this issue thanks to translators actively intervening. There's definitely anti-gay edicts in Leviticus, but that also rules out black pudding and partially cooked steak, which is widely ignored. There's also a very pro homosexuality story in a David and Jonathan incident. David overflows with love for Jonathan and the original text is very specific about which bit of David overflows.

Even were it not for these passages, Jesus accepted tax collectors and sinners, a radical move. I think they are going against the spirit of Christianity.

I attend an inclusive church. Would definitely recommend it.

@Switcheroonie - re your question upthread, take a look at the 'Soul Survivors' threads.

I simply pointed out that a previous poster compared homosexuality to beastiality and so maybe its not a good idea to take their advice.

Hmmm Wonder if you're at my Church @overwhelmed2023 , there's s growing group of us struggling immensely with our new conservative (with both big and little c) Vicar. It's not just the difference in theology but not the insistence he's got a God given duty to ensure we're only exposed to these views.

Currently going through the grieving process, only blessing is that we will leave en masse

I asked our group leader if they were fundamentalist but she didn't know what it was.
I find some members very sheltered and narrow minded as most of them come from an entire family of Christian's, believe in six day creation etc and have been homeschooled so it's basically their ' normal'.
I've left the group. Still in the church but on the brink of leaving. It feels like I'm being controlled!!

Just ordered ' How to be a bad Christian'

Sounds full on fundie to me. I'd run a mile.

@Sssudio this happened to the previously very inclusive Baptist church I went to as a child. Much loved minister left after getting a promotion.

Congregation had a lucky escape when the new wannabe fundie minister was caught shagging the female youth minister.

Can you define fundie/ fundamentalist for me pls