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Original poster

Can an atheist go to church?

89 replies

GetOrf · 04/06/2011 01:27

Please bear with me as will probably not make sense.

I have been an atheist as long as I can remember. However I have alwasy found churches to be deeply moving and despite never having attended a service per se, when attending wedding, christenings, school services etc I find having been to church soothing. I also enjoy what seems to be the ritual, the organ music, the beauty of the church, the sermons.

I don't know if I believe in a higher being - I have been a non-believer so long it almost seems ludircous to even contemplate the thought. However I find myself interested in the idea of attending church. I very much respect what I know to be the basic tenet of Christianity. However i don't want to study the bible, go on an Alpha course. I just would be interested in attending church and quietly watching and being involved in a low level way.

Is it incredibly shallow to think this? Does it seem that I am cherry picking bits of christianity which I would enjoy? Am I being absurd in liking in an aesthetic level the anglican ritual aspects of church worship, and can I just go to church and sing hymns and sit and the back an watch, just to feel soothed? And if it is, how do I go about it? I have no idea of how to go about going to church, can I just turn up? Or am I being insulting to dedicated and knowledgable christians by thinking I can just roll up, sing a hymn, listen to the music and sermons and gaze at the stained glass just for the enjoyment of it?

I would like to know what christians would think of someone who attended church for these reasons.

Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
GetOrf · 07/06/2011 14:50

Crikey, what is a quire as opposed to a nave?

I am laughing at the thought of my sitting in the back all on my own, wondering where everyone is Grin

Which service should I try (I am very sorry, this is like Christianity for the Stupid isn't it? Grin)

Sunday 12 June
07:40Morning Prayer
08:00Holy Communion
10:15Sung Eucharist
15:00No service
17:00Installation of the new Dean of Gloucester
the Reverend Canon Stephen Lake

I may well go to the installation of the new Dean, that sounds like it will be interesting. But normally there is a choral evensong at 3pm. Which is the best service for philistines like me to go to, the sung eucharist or the choral evensomg.

And what do I do when they all start trailing up for communion? Is it OK to just sit there and look vacant?

OP posts:
WillbeanChariot · 07/06/2011 14:58

I haven't read the whole thread .

I am Catholic and have been to mass at all kinds of random places. It's usually pretty busy and quite possible to come and go without speaking to anyone at all if that's what you prefer. There are plenty of people who don't go to communion for all sorts of reasons and you can go for a blessing or stay in your seat. DH (pretty much atheist) comes with me sometimes and he feels fine with it. I'm sure you would be welcome in a Catholic church. And we usually have good hymns, in my one anyway...

I reckon sung Eucharist would be best to go to at the C of E if you like the music. I would guess that would be the busiest.

Hope you enjoy it.

GrimmaTheNome · 07/06/2011 15:01

We used to quite often go to choral evensongs if we were in a cathedral town during the holidays. I think quite a lot of visitors do. You don't have to do anything at all really, you don't have to mumble along to the creed or anything if you don't want to. Just listen to the music and enjoy the atmosphere.

The quire is the bit where the choir sits - the bit with misericords and some princes tomb in the middle IIRC Grin

I wouldn't go to a Eucharist (communion/mass) as you presumably wouldn't want to do the bread/wine bit and that would make you stick out a bit.

mummytime · 07/06/2011 15:05

Sung Eucharist, and lots of people don't go up (or you can go up but carry your service sheet or hymn book and get a prayer instead, keep your hands below the altar rail). Choral Evensong is nice too.

GrimmaTheNome · 07/06/2011 15:06

The last time I was in Gloucester cathedral was Boxing Day before last... terrible weather and they kindly let the morris dancers and mummers perform in the Chapter House instead of outside. That's more my style nowadays TBHGrin.

WillbeanChariot · 07/06/2011 15:08

TotallyUnheardOf I just read the thread back and wanted to say I thought your post was great.

I am 'theologically liberal' too and have many issues with the Catholic church. I stick with it as most of the Catholics I know feel the same way at least to an extent. If we stay perhaps we can change things. [optimist emoticon]

Sorry for slight hijack OP.

nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:22

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=ragamuffinsoul.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/church-floor-plan425.jpg&imgrefurl=www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/01/what-will-the-local-american-church-look-like-in-20-years/&usg=__Q1uwQKwRsWrQlfsWfAcpQSZp5j8=&h=334&w=550&sz=21&hl=en&start=25&zoom=1&tbnid=CYUXN8StCvjR5M:&tbnh=115&tbnw=190&ei=cTPuTeSHO8Ss8QPqr4GjCQ&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dplan%2Bof%2Ba%2Bchurch%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D839%26tbm%3Disch&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=667&page=2&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:6,s:25&tx=139&ty=65&biw=1280&bih=839" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this is a basic plan of a normal church
the Quire is the bit before the High Altar, in front of the nave - the Choir normally sits/stands/sings from there.
In most older churches, the organ is on the side of the Quire
In this picture, the nave is in the main part of the church, but most of us would refer to the bit in the cross part as the nave.
the part labelled "chancel" in this picture is where the Quire would be.
(i'll see if i can find a better one)

nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:25

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.st-nicolas.org.uk/plan/images/church_plan.gif&imgrefurl=www.st-nicolas.org.uk/history.htm&usg=__IUVw_CZNhY-h-jm-aOmmkSxUtEY=&h=397&w=580&sz=15&hl=en&start=72&zoom=1&tbnid=7d_3wWPzRW49gM:&tbnh=139&tbnw=203&ei=cTPuTeSHO8Ss8QPqr4GjCQ&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dplan%2Bof%2Ba%2Bchurch%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D839%26tbm%3Disch&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=537&vpy=151&dur=323&hovh=169&hovw=247&tx=166&ty=111&page=4&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:14,s:72&biw=1280&bih=839" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this one's better
they've called the Quire the Choir (the quire is its originial spelling and refers to the building, the Choir refers to the group who sings there)
I might have put the Nave too far forward - in our church, we don't really havea crossing, so the nave is further forward

Niecie · 07/06/2011 15:27

I'm a bit late to this so I hope you don't mind me butting in with my bit. I would go to the 10.15 service. You probably wouldn't want to go to communion - you can feel like a bit of a spare part if you aren't able to go up too and if that is the focus of the service it will probably be a waste of time. It is the nitty gritty of being at a Christian and shouldn't be something you do lightly.

The 10.15 would be your average service with hymns and a sermon, a few prayers . It doesn't require anything of you. You might find the same from the average evensong service but not next week because there will be a certain amount of pomp and ceremony with the installation going on. It might also be a bit longer than usual.

FWIW we go to church as a family most weeks and I am not sure what I believe really. I believe that Jesus existed and did some amazing things - how amazing I don't know. Whether he is the son of God, I don't know. However, I go to church for the peace, the sense of community (the people are lovely and we wouldn't meet most of them otherwise) the singing (we have a great music groups which can do traditional organ and modern guitar and keyboard type songs) and the time out of daily life. I don't think you have to believe, just be respectful. If it is prayer time, you can still give thanks and 'confess' things you have done wrong but you just aren't expecting a higher being to hear it or give you forgiveness. There is nothing wrong with thinking 'I shouldn't have shouted at the children today, I should say sorry and try harder not to do it again' or whatever. It is just nice to have a chance for reflection on the week. God doesn't have to be part of it.

I also don't think anybody in the church will mind or expect anything from you. They want people to go to church. They want people to hear the word of God and they want that word to spread. The church won't survive if new people don't join so they aren't going to scare you away. IME nobody tries to change you but you might change all the same. That is entirely up to you of course.

QueenofHerts · 07/06/2011 15:33

GETORF - I actually know Glouccester cathedrals' new dean! He was here in st albans cathedral beforehand and was brilliant. He did loads of stuff with and for kids and is very down to earth. I'd deffo go to one of the services where he's doing the sermon 'cos chances are it will be fun as well as though-provoking

Bramshott · 07/06/2011 15:35

I'd try the 10.15. In Gloucester you go in through the main big door, and then turn right to go up the side of the nave (big bit), to the Quire (little bit near the top). There will probably be someone directing and handing out service sheets. There are seats around and behind the choir (old woodeny looking ones) and then some more seats in rows up the top near the altar. It's fine to sit anywhere.

Original poster
GetOrf · 07/06/2011 15:36

Oh aren't you all lovely Smile

Thank you very much.

I think I will go to the 10.15 service (let's be honest, I am not physically ableto get up and out by 8.15 on a Sunday morning Grin).

I have had a look at the Gloucester cathedral plan nickel to see if it is laid out as the ones you have linked, however it only shows where the gift shop, toilets and candlestand are Hmm

OP posts:
nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:40

The Sung Eucharist would be the most inviting

the Choral evensong is beautiful, but havey going (although you could listen to it on Radio 4 to get used to it)

nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:50

st catherine's looks quite good

barnabas

st james

nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:50

that middle one should have been st barnabus

nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 15:54

ps the virtual tour page gives you the info

Original poster
GetOrf · 07/06/2011 16:06

Thanks nickel Grin

I think I may got straight in at the deep end and go to the cathedral - it looks like I will be more anonymous than at those churches - they look very welcoming however!

OP posts:
nickelbabe · 07/06/2011 16:12

form the anonymous POV, yes, but don't forget the parish churches are the ones that need your money, cos they son't get it from the donations that cathedrals get Wink

TotallyUnheardOf · 07/06/2011 17:52

Thank you Willbean. Just to clarify: I have always been CofE, but for entirely practical reasons (needing to find a school that would take them for just a few months) my dds ended up in a Catholic school in the US.

Our main cathedral services are all in the nave too (though a 'shortened' nave for the family service as they don't use the high altar). Of your list, GetOrf, I'd go to the 10.15. It's most likely to be the one that's family-friendly (not sure if you are planning on taking kids or not, but you might want to think about it), and probably also the best-attended (good for blending-in purposes!). The music should be a good combination of joiny-inny old-fashioned hymns (and perhaps some more modern ones too [special shuddery emoticon for nickelbabe Wink]) and lovely choir anthems. During the communion just stay in your seat and don't uncomfortable - no-one will mind.

I came back to warn you about the Peace - just in case it crept up on you and you weren't expecting it. Sorry if you know this already, but if you don't then forewarned is forearmed! About halfway through the service the priest will invite people to offer one another a sign of peace. At this point people around you may shake your hand, and some may say 'peace be with you'. It's fine to just shake and smile. Some people (and, in my limited experience, some congregations) are more enthusiastic about this than others. Some may leave their seats and wander about 'peace-ing' all and sundry. Some go looking for their special friends. Others (e.g. me!) stay where they are and only peace when peaced-at (iykwim). Personally I quite like this: it's a way of feeling part of a community and accepted and involved - a personal contact, I suppose - without anyone asking you questions or engaging you in small-talk. It also doesn't (necessarily - theologically the reason for doing it is because Jesus told his followers that His peace was His gift to them, so it's a passing-on of that, but that's implicit rather than explicit) involve any profession of belief, so whatever you do or don't believe, wishing peace upon your neighbours is (it seems to me) a pretty unproblematic thing to do. I hope I have made this feel like a warm and involving part of the service and not something scary and off-putting. I just thought it was best to be prepared!

TotallyUnheardOf · 07/06/2011 17:53

... don't feel uncomfortable [gah, typing too fast!]

GrimmaTheNome · 07/06/2011 18:13

omg, I'd forgotten the CofE was into that peace thing. I'd be sorely tempted to do a Vulcan 'live long and prosper' instead Grin

tuffie · 07/06/2011 18:13

Getorf - You realise that we're all going to be on the edge of our seats/pews wondering how you get on... !