Please help, my dog bit someone

[Lisa231186]

I can’t believe I’m even having to think about this let alone write for advice but I just don’t know who to turn to and I’m so lost.
Some back story. I have a 3 year old male (neutered) Alaskan malamute. I know everyone says “my dog has never shown aggression” but hand on heart he never has. In fact, he’s sort of known locally for being so friendly and a bit of a dope if I’m honest. He loves people, he’s a fluffy sort of handsome dog and gets a lot of attention. And absolutely loves it. Loves being petted. Has only ever been very docile. We have 3 children who adore him and and who he adores. I’ve always been sensible as I know he’s a dog at the end of the day but never has any fear or worry of him being touched, petted, played with. When people have asked to to pet him I have always said yes he’s friendly. It’s hard to put into this short space just how friendly he’s been until now.
So, on Thursday, I was walking him (it’s usually me who walks him) he was on lead and just walking calmly next to me. We saw our local postman (who knows us and my dog by name) and he said hello (our names) we went to say hi. He was petting bear, and he sort of lent over him and got down to his face. And out of nowhere it felt, my dog bit his lip. I pulled him back as quickly as I could but it was too late. My dog didn’t pull to get back he just sat there didn’t show any further aggression. I know it was still aggression in first instance just want to explain he wasn’t sort of savaging him.
I immediately called 999 myself, the operator asked me what the dog was doing now and he was sat there like nothing had happened. I was a wreck. I’ve never felt so bad for someone and so guilty. They told me to secure him. I live a few minutes away from where it happened so I ran back and secured him in the house and went back to help the postman. By now people had come out of their houses understandably and it was a bit of a witch hunt of me being told what have I done etc. I was really crying and trying to help the post man who kept saying “it was an accident” but I felt like no it was my dog and this is my fault. Anyway, he really didn’t want an ambulance but he called his friend to take him to a local walk in centre and I waited for him to go. I called 101 when I got back and said I need to report what has happened. They told me it had already been done by the 999 operator and I needed to wait to hear from a police officer. I had a call around an hour later from a police lady. She explained she had spoken to the postman, a witness and the dog warden and they had decided it was an accident, not an attack. And that there would be no further action. She said the postman had been adamant he wanted no further action.
But I didn’t feel relieved, I am struggling to explain how I feel. I just never in a million years thought this could happen. I guess I feel like the trust is gone. And with having kids I think I’m catastrophising thinking what if it was a child, one my children, what if he was more badly injured and again, I just never thought this would ever be something he would do.
Since then, I’ve contacted the dogs trust for advice. I’ve booked him in for a vet appointment which is tomorrow. Explained to them, they were shocked too as they know him and couldn’t believe it as he’s always been so gentle and sweet even when having not so nice things done. I’ve also paid for a dog behaviourist to come to my home on Tuesday. He’s been great, he put my mind at rest a bit and has said it could be a totally isolated incident but of course before he meets us doesn’t know a lot more than about what happened Thursday. Both the vets and dog behaviourist have said try not to treat him too differently. But that’s the thing I can’t. I’m so worried, I’m on edge, anxious. I feel so scared of him even being around my kids now. I’ve been getting up at 5:30 to walk him before anyone is around and taking him out late at night in the evening. I keep saying it but I just can’t explain this feeling I have, I’ve never had it before. It’s like I just can’t believe he did it and I’m so fearful that it could happen again.
We’ve explained to the kids (the vet gave us this advice) that he has been feeling under the weather so to give him more space than usual. But even with them doing that, I’m just so on edge. My partner thinks I’m in a bit of shock from the whole thing. I don’t know, all I know is it feels like he was my best friend (he is a mummy’s boy we spend all our time together) to me now, if I’m honest a bit scared of.

To be clear, if a man is in your face trying to kiss you, 100% correct to slap him or worse. Well done you 👍🏽

.seriously...you condone a dog biting. ??...i bet you address your dog as a fur baby !!!!!!!!!

This is a sad story
sounds like you are doing everything you can however the dog bit without provocation and I for one could not trust it around my children. I’d definitely look at rehoming.

Without being a fly on the wall and watching what happened, it sounded like the dog felt a little threatened by what the postie was doing. When I stroke a dog I don't know, I do it without putting my face close to the dog and keeping it at arms length. I think it was the postie's fault YANBU.

I think you need to put this in context. Was the dog acting aggressively? My dog bit my DS’s lip a couple of months ago. I know my dog is not aggressive, they were playing, rolling around on the floor and my DS had his face in my dog’s face. Using their mouths and teeth is how dogs communicate and play.

If you have not noticed any aggressive behaviour then I don’t think there is anything to worry about.

Why would you take a great brute like that out in public without a muzzle?

I agree.

The postman wasn’t a complete stranger - OP said he knows her and the dog by name, so I’d assume this wasn’t the first time he’d interacted with it. Yes obviously less familiar than someone in the household, but still, would you really be able to relax at home worrying that your child might make a movement that they don’t know the dog will view as wrong?

Well the police didn't see it that way 🤷‍♀️

What a batshit way to live, if you have to take a dog like that out for walks AT ALL your property is too small for it, jesus

Not your dog, not your decision.
I had three livestock guarding dogs in a 3 bed semi for years and had no issues at all.

Well as I said in the post you quoted mine has bitten twice and is still alive that would be a no
I think that unless there is serious injury or a regular pattern of aggression each case should be assessed in isolation

I just wish people would throughly research the breeds of dog, their behaviours, natural instincts and requirements before making a decision to bring them into the home. Truly ask themselves if they can provide adequate exercise, mental stimulation, commit to training and in the case of working breeds provide them with an alternative stimulation to satisfy their desire to work. Provide enough space to decompress and relax. Breaks my heart when I hear people say it’s attacked a human pts immediately. In this case the dog had probably misread the situation and thought he was under attack. No one should approach a dog head on and lean over it and get in its face that’s just asking for trouble. As kids it was always drummed into us never to touch a dog we didn’t know and if we did and got bitten then it would be our own fault! also never disturb them when they are in their beds or resting. Many breeds have evolved to understand human behaviour more effectively and would have deciphered that situation differently but Malamute’s are still very in touch with their wild instincts and deserve to be treated accordingly. Having a dog as a friend is a privilege and we need to do our upmost to understand their side of the story too.
This is in no way a negative to the OP I don’t know her and she has my full sympathy. Obviously the dog is loved so much and a simple incident beyond her control has rocked the families world. This is in response to all the people out there wanting to inflict the death sentence on any dog who simply forgot for a split second it’s supposed to suppress its natural instincts and think human. Maybe we should try thinking dog for a change.

Got a spare 15 minutes so I thought I would address a few of the points in one go
Firstly, I am one million percent taking full accountability for this and not making any excuses at all. The poor postman didn’t want me to call the police, I did. I understand the severity totally. If it was decided by them he needed to be put to sleep (for a couple of hours when I was waiting to be contacted back I convinced myself this was going to happen) and I had planned how I would tell the kids he became suddenly really poorly. As heartbroken as I would have been I would have accepted that was the outcome.
I also would have followed any terms put in place. But as mentioned after consulting the dog warden at the council (I think that what’s she called them) the postman and a witness it was decided nothing was going to be done from that standpoint.
I didn’t feel like I wanted to sweep this under the carpet (because again I understand the severity) didn’t know where to turn so called dogs trust, vets, dog behaviourist.

Also, my partner thinks I’m a moron for posting on here, it’s something I’ve never done before. But I’ve never felt as conflicted about something as I am this. I’ve obviously spoken to our friends and family, a lot have kids. They all know the dog so are along the lines of the people saying it’s isolated, they wouldn’t rehome him, I’m taking the right steps. Etc. they are all totally shocked like I am but where they no him I’m only getting that perspective. Which is why I thought asking essentially strangers would help (I’m driving myself insane constantly thinking) and honestly nobody else seems to be as stressed out as me about it. So maybe selfishly i was looking for some validation that thinking about rehoming him isn’t me being OTT.

Re the breed, so backstory is I’ve only ever had either German shepherds or Alaskan malamutes as pets. Granted most were when I lived at home until the age of 20. My parents have had two mals and two German shepherd’s. My first “own” dog was a German shepherd who passed away when he was 9. A year later I got this dog. I drove from Hampshire to Scotland to a specific breeder I trust and have a great relationship with her to this day. She has been helping me a lot with this all going on. I understand people’s view on big dogs. Has it changed my view, if I’m totally honest, maybe.

re the trainer. He was recommended by dogs trust, I’ve researched him and he has 30 years experience. Is he costing a small fortune, yep but of course I’ll do whatever I need to and I feel confident in his experience. If I have a to take a loan then I will before I think about having him put to sleep without even getting professional help. He’s been great so far, I’ll know more when he comes over this week.

the children side I totally agree with, without a doubt we will be totally transparent. We’ve had a chat with the kids about things and please believe they are the main reason I’m spiralling like I am. And although a hard read about them it’s nothing I haven’t already thought about and I’m not considering. It’s my main reason (other than the constant feeling of guilt I have) for trying to make the right decisions.

I’ve already contacted my home insurance as honestly I would totally get him prosecuting, I am covered. Like I say, I get it.

ive been voice noting the behaviourist guy a bit today when I can as he checked in this morning (he got the brunt of a hysterical me on Friday morning when I called him) I bought up euthanasia, he was quite frankly shocked. He said please do not even consider rehoming let alone that anymore until we’ve met.

I think, I’m probably a bit shocked still (not taking away from the poor postman I’m sure he’s way more shocked) but what I’m getting at is I’ve not really slept, my brain is a bit mush and I’m trying to keep it together for the kids so I’m just not thinking as effectively as I usually do. Also had the flu last week (again not looking for sympathy) but i think I need to go to the appointment tomorrow, meet with the professional. And evaluate when I have a better head on my shoulders as right now I’m a bit of an emotional idiot.

I do want to say thanks for the responses, positive and not so much.
and a special thank you to anyone who has offered support and not been quick to judge (but those who have I get that too)

I’ll update after the vets tomorrow

A dog biting with no warning is very worrying imo, especially when you have children who will inevitably get over excited, bother the dog occasionally or get in their face (or have friends over who will).
Anyone who thinks a child under about 10 can be 100% reliable is overestimating them.

The dog trainer will of course tell you not to put the dog down or re home because then he lose out on your fees 🙈
More importantly, regardless of whether the police told you you had to have the dog put down or not, why would you not do so, to prevent risk of harm to others? Why are you happy to take the risk that one of your own children or somebody else’s children may be bitten next, if they approach the dog in the wrong way?
Thats is the part of this story that I struggle with. Why risk it?

So unless the dog bites on a regular basis (monthly, weekly!) or inflicts serious injury (mains or disfigures?) then it can bite every now and then and no problem from your side? Yikes 🙈

I've never had a dog, so this is just based on my opinion - it sounds as if the postman loomed over your dog and he could have perceived that action as a threat. You also state that your dog is a 'Mummy's dog', and is used to being with you for a large proportion of his time. This man wasn't your husband or children, and your dog may have thought he was a threat to you. Some dogs can be very protective over their human family members. You have taken steps - vet appointment, behaviourist etc, to try and understand why your normally placid dog behaved in this way but also to stop it from occurring again. At this stage I don't think you"re necessarily in a 'rehoming' situation. You need to see what the vet and behaviourist say. It maybe that you need to muzzle your dog whilst out and perhaps mitigate against such incidents by taking him for early morning and late evening walks. How old are your children? Are they old enough to understand that they need to respect the dog's boundaries and recognise signs that he may be becoming agitated or upset. Dogs are animals, and even the most docile and placid animal can bite/scratch. I have a cat, and we have learnt to recognise signs that he's had enough fuss or he's been overstimulated. He'll give a gentle bite or a swipe, not to be nasty but to say 'back-off'.

Because it's not always as simple as a bite is a bite @redkite27 , it can depend on the circumstances and some bites can be accidental or just intended as a warning to get out of the dogs space. Not everything is black and white and it doesn't always follow that the dog is "dangerous".

I do hear that but surely it’s the outcomes that matter? A dog bites and whatever the reason is for that it can have very serious outcomes for the person bitten. So why take the risk? Especially with such a large working breed.

I’m concerned that a dog behaviourist is shocked that you’d consider re-homing or euthanasia when they know you have children in the house.

Even if that isn’t the end result, I think the fact your immediate response was to be considering those options was perfectly natural and proves that you are being a responsible dog owner.

If your gut instinct is that your children’s safety (or the safety of their friends) is at risk, don’t let a dog behaviourist try and convince you otherwise and sway your decisions.

The dog must be destroyed and you should be thankful you are not being prosecuted. Poor postman.

Oh also, I think I may have exaggerated how well the postman “knows” us.
This was pointed out to me quite firmly by the dog behaviourist guy today. We are not friends, he knows my name as Mrs * from my post. He pointed out he’s never seen him outside the property. He’s (as in the dog) come to the door if I’ve had signed for parcels.
again, NOT making excuses but just trying to be as clear as possible around the circumstances. Aware my original post sort of insinuated we’re buddies. Which is misleading.

He loves people, he’s a fluffy sort of handsome dog and gets a lot of attention. And absolutely loves it. Loves being petted. Has only ever been very docile.

And this I suspect is part of the problem. You think he loves being petted. I never touch a dog I do not know but I do met a local dog 1/2 times a week which practically sits on my feet and refuses to budge unless I have petted it. He is on a lead and the owner is really nice and tolerates her dogs insistence on a pet before moving off. Any other dog gets ignored. Most owners are happy for me to do so.

Has he been docile or just tolerant?

Final thing before I go back to mum duties. I must stress I don’t feel like the children are in danger. Yes I’m being extra vigilant (I was never not) but I don’t think he is going to attack them at any given moment or he most certainly would not be in the house.

@Lisa231186 i saw a similar incident described with a GSD I think on YouTube and the analysis seemed to be that the person who got bitten, on the lip also, was leaning over the dog and it’s almost like an instinctual reaction especially for guard type dogs and perhaps this is why your dog just sat there like nothing had happened afterwards. I guess now you have this info you’ll need to police more closely interactions between him and strangers but I’d agree with the trainer that he wouldn’t need a muzzle and likely this was a one off but I do think it could be replicated if a stranger approached him like this again.