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Original poster

At my wits end! Crying cat.

32 replies

rejectangiiexo · 19/09/2018 01:43

Hello!! I am due in December & ive just finally started keeping my cat downstairs at night, ready for when baby is here. I kept putting it off and half doing it as I just feel so bad and give in to her cries.

Im not sure what I can do :( im at my wits end! She cries and cries and scratches at the living room door all night for hours on end (I can hear this from upstairs ) it properly breaks my heart hearing him like that!! I cant give in it needs to be done, but he's obviously very stressed (& so am I! !) What can I do to help??

I was thinking a calming plug in? Which ones best that doesn't cost a lot? Any other ideas? He is ill atm too with cystitis but i know this isn't why he's crying as I've tried to shut him downstairs in the past when he's been ok and he still cries. Ibe also chosen now to shut him down there as he was going to stay up here until he was better but due to the cystitis he's weeing / bleeding everywhere and i just can't afford to keep washing /replacing everything! One time he riripped my voils down when he was downstairs all night (he's never naughty ).

Any ideas, tips, advice you have is massively appreciated! ! I just hope if anything by time baby's here he'll be used to it & settled & be ok with the baby...

OP posts:
Original poster
rejectangiiexo · 19/09/2018 01:45

Argh ive put a mix of she / her and him his. He's a boy. Which I just recently found out after thinking he was a girl for over a year so its getting used to saying/typing him lol.

OP posts:
weelis02 · 19/09/2018 21:11

Can imagine you're stressing out! Sounds like he is too. How old is he? Is he used to being upstairs near you at night?

expatinspain · 19/09/2018 21:15

Why do you need to keep him downstairs when the baby arrives? I just shut DD's door and that was fine. The cystitis is probably going to get worse with stress. Is he on antibiotics? I would let him back up for now. Get a felaway plugin (not sure if that's the right spelling). They work really well.

MsOliphant · 19/09/2018 21:15

Can he go outside? My cat kicks up merry hell if she's shut downstairs and can't roam.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 19/09/2018 21:16

Sorry-he sounds so stressed and unhappy-poor darling (and poor you)
I know my darling cat was very stressed when my dog died and the vet gave her a herbal tranquilliser to mix in tuna.
Sounds like you need to sort out his health issues- I'm not sure if I could bear to lock him down now...

MossyOilTank · 19/09/2018 21:19

Check this out: icatcare.org/advice/feline-lower-urinary-tract-disease-flutd

TheQueef · 19/09/2018 21:23

We moved house and our old boy took umbrage.
Yelled and yelled (Burmese so loud) at anyone and everything until we took him to the vets who gave him herbal sleeping pills which took a week but did eventually work.

GetOffTheTableMabel · 19/09/2018 21:24

Royal Canin do a ‘Calm’ dry cat food which we first used when we moved house and I reintroduce it now a couple of weeks before we go on holiday. Zylkene is a tranquilliser type capsule that you can add to food too.

BackToTheFuschia7 · 19/09/2018 21:27

@rejectangiiexo Please don’t sedate him or lock him outside. If he’s prone to cystitis the stress will make him worse and you’ll end up with a very poorly cat and a massive vet bill. Just let him stay with you - when your loud crying baby arrives he will keep his distance, trust me. Is he on any medication for the cystitis?

explodingkitten · 19/09/2018 21:28

Maybe you could try putting a shirt you slept in in his basket? Maybe smelling you will help a bit.

handle1 · 19/09/2018 21:30

Why keep the car downstairs?
I've had 3 children and the car had no interest in any of the babies?

princesstiasmum · 19/09/2018 21:31

Are you worried he will hurt the baby? i would just let him roam, cystitis will get worse with stress
Ask your vet for some Zylkene,or you can buy it online cheaper, but not expensive anyway,its a calmer, it contains something , called cassein,which is derived from milk.also some cat food has this in it,
It works well and isnt a drug, but i have had cats around babies and they have never come to any harm [babies that is]
Poor cat might be in pain, maybe another visit to the vet, he shouldnt be bleeding like you describe

handle1 · 19/09/2018 21:31

Ha ha sorry not car the cat 🤣

Original poster
rejectangiiexo · 20/09/2018 03:49

I did write out a huge reply then my phone crashed!! Second time lucky-

I have taken him ti the vets, hence I know it's cystitis! Which in was told doesn't need antibiotics but i have been given pain relief for him. Not sure if it's working... vet did say since im not a vet I won't be able to tell if it turns into anything more serious (and yes I know urine infections etc can be fatal in cays! That's why I took him through ) he was only there monday, if he isnt better by next Monday I will phone for advice and take him back through if necessary! As for he shouldn't be bleeding like i described, the vet didnt seem too concerned and said its due to the cystitis.

I wouldn't say he's "used" to sleeping upstairs with me, he does like being near me, more so since being pregnant but 8/10 when i wake up he's downstairs sleeping anyways! I just don't think he likes shut doors... the reason I wanted him to be used to being downstairs for when baby is here is that I've heard so many horror stories of cats lying on babies faces - because it's warm - he does like to lie where it's warm & he doesnt care where that is! Ive had him on my face before, try and move him away from anywhere and he'll just go straight back to where he was. I'd never forgive myself if I were to be asleep and he laid on my babies face and suffocated him. He wouldnt do it on purpose I know he wouldnt but i dont even know if I could risk it, I mean could you? I have been looking into calming plug ins and feliway was one I was looking at.

I think i may let him come back up whilst he isnt well but then there's if he bleeds or wees anywhere in my room. I haven't noticed any bleeding since the other day though. ..

OP posts:
Original poster
rejectangiiexo · 20/09/2018 04:01

Oh and he's about 6! Unsure of proper age as my dad rescued him from the streets and gifted him to me, when he took him to the vets shortly after they said he was around 5 and that was a year ago now.

OP posts:
Nandocushion · 20/09/2018 04:20

Cats don't lie on babies' faces - ime cats are pretty bemused by babies, not attracted to them. Please don't shut him out. Like a pp said, he will keep his distance once the baby is there crying. If you are still nervous then you can surely keep the baby's door shut. If baby is sleeping with you then you have no need to worry.

expatinspain · 20/09/2018 22:25

I had a cat who got cystitis and she was given antibiotics every time. It clears up so quickly with them. I'm not a vet, but I thought this was the usual treatment??

Also, cats really don't lie on babies faces. They stay the hell away. They don't like the noise or the smell. They're scared of babies if anything. My two didn't come best DD until she was about 2 1/2, then they became best if friends.

thisisnotmyname87 · 20/09/2018 22:33

You can buy cat nets to fit on Moses basket/crib etc. My cat hasn't bothered with my baby at all and I worried too throughout my pregnancy about this. If anything she stays well clear. Now my daughter is in her own room we just keep her bedroom door shut. I wouldn't stress over it too much. Good luck

MossyOilTank · 20/09/2018 23:06

Cystitis in cats is usually sterile. It's very rare for them to have bacterial infection, and antibiotics are unnecessary. Anti-inflammatory medications will help quickly and should be used routinely.

Original poster
rejectangiiexo · 20/09/2018 23:44

I have done my research on cats and babies, in some cases they do lie on then, I know people its happened to also...

"If a cat presses up against the face of a bundled infant who doesn’t know to turn away on his own, this is a dire problem. Infant deaths by suffocation are most often attributed to pillows or a sleeping person accidentally smothering the infant as they sleep together.

Bottom line? Keep your cat out of the nursery during napping or bedtime, just in case."

I dont want to keep him out, stresses me out as much as him! I just don't know if I would risk chancing it.. cant shut babies nursery door as he's going to be in my room for first 6 months in a moses basket. I just feel pressured into training the cat to stay downstairs because of what my family say about it, even tho I live on my own.

OP posts:
princesstiasmum · 30/09/2018 01:26

I have never known a vet not give ABs for cystitis.mine has done.the bleeding sounds bad

MossyOilTank · 30/09/2018 07:52

Only around 1 in 10 cases are bacterial. About two thirds or more are sterile and do not require antibiotics, but instead need anti-inflammatory medication and lifestyle changes to treat effectively.

keepingbees · 30/09/2018 09:11

How about just getting a cat protection net for the baby's cot? I know nothing about these before anyone shoots me down but if they work it would solve your worries

Girliefriendlikesflowers · 30/09/2018 09:29

Does he go outside? My cat is shut downstairs but can go out via the cat flap. She doesn't like being shut downstairs but accepts it!!

Yes to feliway and I would go back to vets if he is still struggling.

SilverHairedCat · 30/09/2018 09:33

My cat got cystitis due to stress. Could his be because you've closed the doors on him? Or did it start before this? Maybe this is not the right time to start this training anyway, it's clearly stressing him more.

Find another way to keep the cat out the room, but I do think it's an over reaction.

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