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Original poster

Would a vet help me in this way?

73 replies

SMJYellow · 21/11/2017 16:52

The familys dog is old. 13 years this winter.

She was diagnosed with arthritis last year and needs monthly medication. She was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year. We didn't operate due to her age.

I think its long past time to put the dog to sleep. The dog is deteriorating. Not majority bit slowly. Like, she's not able to hold for toilet for long any more. I think she is also deaf.

Me wishing to put the dog to sleep is a battle with the family. My mother and one brother living at home.

I have a brother coming home in December around about the 10th. I was told, well wait for him to come home and then we will see what he thinks and decide then. I know in my heart and soul it will be delayed further. Its not fair on the dog any more. She has a lump the size of a deflated football or breakfast bowl on her belly.

I need to go over to the vet later in the week to pick up more medicine. If I was to talk to them and tell them what's happening,would they help me. I'd like to book the dog in with the pretendance of a blood test. The dog does need regular blood tests due to her medicine so it won't be far fetched. Then when the dog is in, hopefully put her to sleep.

OP posts:
Teacupinastorm · 21/11/2017 16:58

Hang on - you want to pretend you’re taking the dog in for blood tests but actually get them PTS?

I might have read that wrong, but if that is what you’re thinking then please don’t do that.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 21/11/2017 17:02

You absolutely cannot take the dog to the vet and have her pts like that. Under that pretence.

Floralnomad · 21/11/2017 17:05

Who actually owns the dog , if it’s an old family dog as in your parents bought it then it’s for your mum to decide . You could ask the vet to speak to her and express his views ( if they agree with you) but you cannot have the dog PTS in the underhand manner you speak of above . I will say that lots of dogs have to have medication and become incontinent and that in itself is not a reason to pts if the dog still has a certain quality of life . The lump is a worry but I assume that the vet has agreed that it’s not worth the anaesthetic risk to operate .

Original poster
SMJYellow · 21/11/2017 17:05

That's exactly what I wrote and what you read.

Take her in for a routine blood test but to really put to sleep. I can't see any other way.

Its unbelievably time to put the dog to sleep. She has lump the size of a football on her belly. I knot my family once it goes that late in December, they will say 'its so close to Christmas, let's on until it passes'. It won't be nice to hang on til after Christmas but then I'll be faced with the same thing come January and February too if the dog lives that long.

Its not nice or fair on the family but f*ck them.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 21/11/2017 17:07

You can't take the dog into the vet on the pretext of picking up medication and then put it to sleep.
You can arrange to drive your parents and pet to the vet and listen to the advice of a vet. Or maybe arrange a home visit.

Teacupinastorm · 21/11/2017 17:08

I understand your concerns, however I wouldn’t count being deaf as a reason to PTS. My dog is deaf and has been for a couple of years now, it doesn’t really bother her or us. She still lives a very happy life without hearing.
Toilet - is she losing control? Or just can’t wait too long between bathroom breaks? There’s a big difference I think.

I know you disagree with your family, but surely they love the dog enough to let her go when the time is right? No responsible pet owner would keep their pet alive if they were suffering. If they see the dog more than you maybe they see her enjoying life on a day to day basis, whereas the change is more noticeable to you so looks worse than it is?

Original poster
SMJYellow · 21/11/2017 17:09

The dog is the families dog. Another brother brought the dog home many years ago. He's now gone to Australia.

The vet suggested putting the dog to sleep earlier in the year with the cancer diagnosis.

OP posts:
mustbemad17 · 21/11/2017 17:10

Surely the vet would have told your parents if the dog was suffering? Some dogs can do really well on medication - you said she is deteriorating slowly, rather than gone downhill madly. There's nothing you've said that makes me go 'poor old girl she should be PTS'

And if you take her to be PTS without telling your family sorry but that makes you heartlesd

Original poster
SMJYellow · 21/11/2017 17:11

Teacupinastorm,. The dog is more than just deaf. There is a lump the size of a football the size of a football that is annoying her. She keeps trying to scratch it off.

OP posts:
mustbemad17 · 21/11/2017 17:12

OP you need to get everyone to agree then. You can't just take the dog under some false pretence. Or get the vet to visit you. She has been a family pet for years, everyone will have an attachment. They all deserve the chance to say goodbye

ScrabbleFiend · 21/11/2017 17:14

If the dog is registered under your mum's name they would need her permission to PTS. It's also a very bad idea to go behind your families backs. A check up and blood test does however sound like a good idea and will give you all a better idea of the dog's health status, and it would give the vet the opportunity to talk about PTS if they think it's in the animals best interests. Lots of dogs pootle about with massive lumps on them, as long as it's not restricting the dog's ability to walk that alone is not a reason for PTS.

Teacupinastorm · 21/11/2017 17:15

I know you said about the cancer, I’m just saying I wouldn’t count the other two examples as reasons to PTS.

Maybe arrange for the vet to speak to your family then, but please don’t secretly put your dog to sleep.

MontyPants · 21/11/2017 17:17

Why don't you just ask the vet to speak to your parents about it? Take the dog in, have a chat and explain your concerns, get the dog to ring your parents if their recommendation is to have it PTS. It's absolutely awful losing a family pet. I understand you have good intentions if the dog is in pain, but if you did this to my dog I would never forgive you.

MontyPants · 21/11/2017 17:18

Should say: get the vet to ring your parents. Not the dog. FFS stupid phone keyboard

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 21/11/2017 17:23

I sympathise OP, I really do. I know quite a lot of people who let animals suffer for far too long because they can't bear to let them go.

The way forward is to get your vet on side, perhaps get them to mention that it's actually cruel to make them go on?

BlackPeppercorn · 21/11/2017 17:26

It's a really bad idea.
Our oldest dog is in a comparable situation. Throughout the slow deterioration, all four of us who live with him have discussed how much deterioration is acceptable, what should happen, whether we all want to be present. We've had these discussions with the vet too. In our case, we are all agreed there must be no pain, and as long as he is eating, recognising us and up for an ear scratch, tummy rub and tickle, we plod on.
You all need to take him for his bloods, and discuss his end of life plan with your vet. Your parents need to know that if the vet says it's time, it's time.
But don't do it your way. That's nasty.

JennyOnAPlate · 21/11/2017 17:26

If the vet thinks you should pts then you should pts, no matter what your family say. The welfare of the dog comes first. Flowers

Lottie509 · 21/11/2017 17:27

Aww thats so sad, I have a similar situation with a family member not putting the dog to sleep, they are still keeping him alive when he wont eat therefore has dropped a huge amount in weight and is wetting everywhere. He has kidney failure and is depressed, The stupid vet keeps giving medicines that dont work, and its getting to the point where I just think the vet is trying to make more money, The dog is clearly very poorly its cruel. I'm hoping my relative wises up and puts him down soon, Its so selfishAngry I hope you get somewhere op

Justbookedasummmerholiday · 21/11/2017 17:29

Think of the blame they would lay at your door - you need them to accept responsibility for the dog and share the burden of the decision.
Ask the vet to either ring them or a house visit.

viques · 21/11/2017 17:35

I think it is sometimes very hard to see what is in front of your eyes, especially if you don't want to. I know I left it too long with one of my cats and I only realised later when I looked at his last photos. I deeply regretted it, and never made the same mistake again.

Can I suggest that you put together some photos of the poor dog in chronological order, say over the last 18 months I think it's slow deterioration will be more visible and that might persuade your mum to reconsider.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 21/11/2017 18:16

If you were my daughter or sister and you took the decision to destroy our family dog without consulting us I would never forgive you. It's not your right to deceive the other members of the family in tia. Denying them the right to say their goodbyes to her is evil.

If the vet thinks she is suffering, then you need to find some way to persuade your family or speak to him and take his advice.

Original poster
SMJYellow · 21/11/2017 18:19

The dog isn't registered with my mam or parents. The dog was registered in my sisters name. When she left then, the care of the dog and medical costs were on me and my back.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 21/11/2017 18:21

The owner of the dog needs to make the decision.
Why won't you take the dog and parents for a consultation or call a vet out? I would be devastated if someone got my pet pts without discussing it with me.
Poor dog though. Sounds like it's in a really bad way. Sad

Migraleve · 21/11/2017 18:22

Don't lie about it. Just tell them the dog is too sick and needs to be PTS. Any prolonging is not fair for the dog. The family will jus have to deal with it.

mustbemad17 · 21/11/2017 18:24

So if the care & cost of the dog has fallen to you she isn't a family dog. She's yours.

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