Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Pets

Join our community on the Pet forum to discuss anything related to pets.

Original poster

It was only a bloody cat......

44 replies

Novacane · 27/02/2007 10:47

So why am I sat here in tears nearly 24 hours after my Dad rang me to say that he had to have her put down yesterday morning.

My Dad got her for us after my Mum left us when I was 9, it was something for us both to focus on and nurture I suppose. She was a gorgeous and welcome distraction in some pretty difficult times, and company for my Dad when I was doing the usual teenagers thing.

My Dad adored her and is devastated and feels horribly guilty for making the decision as it was a case of, put her out of her misery now or medicate her and she could last a day or a week or a month sort of thing. He says he feels empty. She was 16 or 17.

We are both soppy buggers as you can probably tell.

He couldn't face being with her when they did it or to take the body home, again hes feeling horrible about that too.

I love my Dad so much, and don't know what im crying most for, him or the bloody cat.

Love you Smudgexxx

OP posts:
ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 10:50

Message withdrawn

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 10:52

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 27/02/2007 10:52

It wasn't only a cat, she was part of the family.

And deserves to be remembered as such.

I think I'd give him a sympathy card and let him remember her, be there to listen to him.

Maybe show him this thread.

RIP, Smudge.

kittylette · 27/02/2007 10:53

it wasnt just a cat though, she was your feline friend,

its horrible loosing a pet

thinking of you

(((((((((((())))))))))))

FioFio · 27/02/2007 10:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

kittylette · 27/02/2007 10:54

yea, i got a sympathy card when my cat Milo died, it was really comforting, you can actully get ones for when pets have died,

crystalpony · 27/02/2007 10:55

To some people (me included) pets are almost as important and precious as humans - in some cases more. So I totally understand your upset and can empathise.

I bought a dog home against my parents wishes when I was 18. I subsequently left home and the dog and though my dad would complain endlessly about feeding the dog, walking the dog etc he was extremely attached to him. So much so, that when the decision was made to put him to sleep at age 15 by me (it was left up to me as he was originally my dog)my dad held him as he died and I have never before or since seen my dad cry. But he cried for days over the dog. I for my part felt horribly guilty that me had pre-meditated his passing but knew deep down it was the kindest thing to do as his health was failing quite badly.

I think the relationship you have with animals is so simplistic and untainted with all the negativity of human issues that it's an extremely precious bond to lose and I hope that you can take comfort in knowing that it's totally understandable.

Hope this helps x

Budababe · 27/02/2007 10:56

I am all teary now after reading that and I don't like cats! (Am allergic which doesn't help).

But it wasn't only a cat - it meant a lot to both of you.

Do you think would your Dad like another cat or is it too soon?

My MIL had 3 cats and the last one died last year - I thought she would get another but she hasn't done as yet.

crystalpony · 27/02/2007 10:59

Also, when Roo died, I printed out a poem about helping your pet to pass with dignity and loving them enough to do this final act of kindness for them etc. Got it off line. I printed it out with a picture of the dog and gave it to dad in a frame, to kind of celebrate that we all gave this dog so much love in his life and as such he really did live a charmed life in our family. My dad couldn't bring himself to read it for about a month but said when he did he felt so comforted by it.

dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 10:59

poor you! Im a vet nurse and see this all the time. And have been through it with my own. He did the right thing and musnt feel guilty. The suffering has stopped and she was probably too old to be put through meds to prolong her life by a short time.
Has he thought about having her ashes? A little expensive but is an option

dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 11:04

THIS IS ON OUR MEMORIAL CARDS AT THE VETS. MAYBE SEND THIS TO YOUR DAD. MAKES ME FEEL TEARFUL AND COMFORTED XXX

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 11:08

Message withdrawn

dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 11:08

WORTHING WEST SUSSEX. YOU?

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 11:09

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 27/02/2007 11:10

Do you have any photos of Smudge?

Maybe make a framed collage for your Dad, as a keepsake.

He might really like that, to remember the happy times.

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 11:10

Message withdrawn

dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 11:11

osj. Love it! But long hours, very mucky and smelly can be upsetting and rubbish pay (not fully qualified yet)

Original poster
Novacane · 27/02/2007 11:12

You guys are great aren't you.

Got all the old photos out that I could find last night, but there is one special one of her smelling a rose that i can't find, it's been hanging around for years and now I can't find it, it's annoying.

I want to do something for my Dad, your ideas are lovely, but will wait for everything to calm down first, think it would tip him over the edge!

Definately a picture and poem, and I maybe want to buy something for his garden, as she loved the garden.

The ashes probably would have been a good idea to bury, but they will be long gone probably. Maybe I should find out, have no idea how all that works.

ant ideas would be most welcomexxx

OP posts:
stleger · 27/02/2007 11:13

Poor Smudge. We have a framed photo of our cat who died 11 years ago, and our more recent cat vanished 4 months ago. Tell your dad and yourself a lot of people understand.

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 11:14

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 27/02/2007 11:14

For now, maybe post a card to him, so he can read it in private and know you're thinking of him and Smudge.

Even a small scrapbook might be a good idea.

ohsmellyjelly · 27/02/2007 11:14

Message withdrawn

dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 11:15

Phone the vets. This sounds awful but your cat is probably kept in cold storage (sorry ) which means there is still time to arrange cremation. Where I work we have a collection once a week from the cremation comapny so I should imagine you would be abole to sort it out. your looking at about £100 though

Original poster
Novacane · 27/02/2007 11:16

are we talking hundreds OMJ....

OP posts:
dionnelorraine · 27/02/2007 11:17

nice to meet u too osj. a fellow vn