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Pedants' corner
Original poster

Survey over whether phrase is rude or note = Your views please!

35 replies

LadyGaggia · 02/04/2010 18:10

I thought I would post in here, at the risk of having my grammar/punctuation criticised, to ask for your opinions.

My husband is vehemently opposed to the use of the phrase "To give a toss" or even the use of the word "toss"

I uphold the belief that it relates to tossing a coin and he says that it means wanking.

He refuses to let me use it at all as he doesn't want the kids using "that kind of language"

Please cast your vote...Is it rude and masterbatory or perfectly harmless?

OP posts:
salbysea · 02/04/2010 18:12

it says wanking to me!

Miggsie · 02/04/2010 18:14

Whatever its origins were, nowadays it does have almost totally wanking overtones.

I would not let my DD say that. I say "I don't give a rat's arse" generally but not in front of DD.

MissAnneElk · 02/04/2010 18:17

I've always assumed it's rude.

Tootiredforgodtyping · 02/04/2010 18:18

I think its rude...

fortyplus · 02/04/2010 18:21

I'm a hypocrite because I might say it but I wouldn't want my sons (14 & 16) to use it... definitely says wanking to me!

ahundredtimes · 02/04/2010 18:21

I don't think it is rude. I agree with you.

If you don't give a toss it means you don't care.

In much the same way as you might toss a newspaper in the bin, or a horse might toss a rider off its back.

It's careless, meaningless, a removal. Perhaps it comes from Tosh. I don't know, I've made that up.

To toss off is to wank, obviously. So I agree with you, unless your dd is saying, 'I don't give a toss off'.

smallorange · 02/04/2010 18:22

I always thought it was related to
tossing a coin, indicating you cared so little, you wouldn't bet on it.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 02/04/2010 18:22

100x is right

DuelingFanjo · 02/04/2010 18:23

doesn't say wanking to me at all in any way. I've never thought about what it means but now I have I still don't think it's anything to do with wanking.

SusieCarmichael · 02/04/2010 18:26

so would you really say 'i couldn't give a wank' ?? doesn't make sense does it?

it just means i don't care

smallorange · 02/04/2010 18:26

According yo google it derives from 'monkey's toss' !

muggglewump · 02/04/2010 18:26

To me it says wanking.

ahundredtimes · 02/04/2010 18:28

what's monkeys toss?

msrisotto · 02/04/2010 18:30

I can see how it might not mean wanking, but that's all it says to me now. Sorry!

TeamEdward · 02/04/2010 18:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VengefulKitty · 02/04/2010 18:32

"I don't give a toss" is perfectly fine and not rude, but due to younger generations associating 'toss' with 'wank' if the phrase is used now, it comes across as ruder than in the recent past.

e.g. "toss off" "who gives a toss" (in that phrase meaning who gives a fuck) and so on.

StealthPolarBear · 02/04/2010 18:34

never thought of it as rude, but also just realised I have never thought about where it comes from (pun unintended)

TrillianAstra · 02/04/2010 19:09

Would never associate it with wanking.

Not profanity, but not polite either. Like saying someone is an idiot is not polite (and you might not want your children saying it) but it is nowhere near saying they are a dickhead.

shockers · 02/04/2010 19:15

I believe that it's referring to the toss of a coin but given it's other meaning , I wouldn't use it. It's quite a dismissive phrase anyway so I wouldn't encourage it's use with my DCs.

fortyplus · 02/04/2010 19:15

I suppose for me it connects closely to 'He's a tosser' - same meaning but slightly softer/less profane than 'He's a wanker'

DorisIsAPinkDragon · 02/04/2010 19:29

IMO if you wouldn't want your dc's to repeat it it could be considered rude.

I do use it (with your connatation) but I still wouldn't want them repeating it so only use it when they are (hopefully) not in earshot!

DontCallMeBaby · 02/04/2010 19:40

Not rude, but way too open to misinterpretation to use in polite society, or allow kids to use unchallenged (as in 'you might find some people find that phrase rude').

I commend not giving a monkey's armpit instead.

Original poster
LadyGaggia · 02/04/2010 19:42

So would you say by totting up the replies on this thread, that I win, or he wins this arguement.

The loser has to eat humble pie

OP posts:
MaryBS · 02/04/2010 19:44

Dunno, but I am with your DH on this...

BuzzingNoise · 02/04/2010 19:44

Rude.