There is no such word as...

[rageymcrageface]

alot
afew
abit

Where in God's name has this all come from? It's so rife on these boards. So many times I've been reading a perfectly reasonable, eloquent post, only to come across one of these "words". I actually fear they will become recognised words and end up in the Oxford Dictionary, just like "selfie". There's probably more that I've forgotten.

I don't claim to be a grammar expert, but these literally aren't even words! I knew I'd be slaughtered if I posted anywhere else about it, so here I am. Does it infuriate anyone also beyond belief? I can't articulate how it makes me feel!

[iklboo]

I was apauled

[rageymcrageface]

"fumming", now that is quite something:

[Ginslinger]

would of finishes me off

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

Anal seems to be an Irish thing??
What? I’m assuming you mean an’ all which is just “and all” in a regional accent; but not especially an Irish one.

[rageymcrageface]

Oh God, yes! How could I forget?! That and could of are definitely up there, level pegging with my original list!

[OkPedro]

iamgreyhound I meant "and all" written as anal not the phrase "and all"
So yeah what they want to type is "an all" but they type Anal

[littlecabbage]

There's probably more that I've forgotten

Should be "there ARE" - sorry OP!

[3ChangingForNow]

Defiantly instead of definitely.. Yes yes defiantly IS a word. Just the WRONG word.

[TownHall]

'Abit' and 'afew' are typos surely?

Some people really struggle with written English and I think it's unkind to be so scornful of them. What if someone had learning difficulties, dyslexia or didn't speak English as a first language reads this thread. Some people could be really upset and embarrassed by it. Is that your intention?

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

Oh I see, Pedro. Why would you actually type in the vernacular at all, though. Nobody needs to “hear” your accent through the written word.

[rageymcrageface]

"Loose" instead of "lose"!

[AskingForAnEnemy]

When people don't know the difference between of and off.

A person on my Facebook keeps posting that she's looking forward to "A week of work"

I have to sit on my hands to not respond with "why would you look forward to a week of work??"

[Hanyu]

Sometimes the space bar doesn't get hit hard enough on my computer, so words get stuck together.

Abit really should be a word.

I'm going to sleep abit. Like a modern version of awhile.

[ferrier]

My phone tries very hard to autocorrect me to some of these and many other even more bizarre non-words. Sometimes I don't notice so I apologise in arrears and in advance if I upset anyone.

[mumsiedarlingrevolta]

Positivity.
It's not a word just because people are trying to make it one.

[iklboo]

Positivity.
It's not a word just because people are trying to make it one.

Sorry, than one is a proper word, especially in science. It's just being over-used by shiny eyed 'life coaches' these days.

[mypoosmellsofroses]

delete if not aloud

[CanadianJohn]

I grew up in a very literate family in an area where dropping the initial 'h' was almost universal. I had a friend who genuinely could not see any difference between 'is' and 'his', as in "I borrowed is book".

This was in pre-internet days, btw, about 60 years ago.

[abbey44]

Discrete being used instead of discreet seems to be increasingly common.

[Lauren0rder]

His and he’s bugs me too.

His not going to school today.

His feeling unwell.

😡😡😡😡

[Dontsweathesmallstuff]

Butlerswharf yes, Restbite drives me crazy.

Its Respite. I need some of that.
I don't fancy any Restbite though, sounds painful

[mumsiedarlingrevolta]

It's just being over-used by shiny eyed 'life coaches' these days

I stand corrected. and totally agree with your assessment

[wizzywig]

Asdas and mataland

[Cattenberg]

Irregardless

[rageymcrageface]

Someone selling their house on Right Move...