Page 5 | Fizz for parents appropriate at a 5 year olds soft play party

TwinkleTwinkleX · 2026-10-20T19:03:41+00:00

We are hosting a party for my daughter in reception at a local soft play with a party room and inviting the whole class. It will be in the afternoon and I’m wondering if it’s appropriate to bring some fizz for the adults or if that’s weird? Obviously not for a boozy one but to offer them a glass?

Boreded · 22/10/2026 15:09

Kingdomofsleep · 21/10/2026 23:12

Do you ever "need" to drink? You drink because you want to, surely, rather than need to.

Is it more or less ok to have a glass at night at home alone in front of the TV or a glass together with friends at a daytime celebration?

I think it's cultural and I think the latter is a healthier way to drink. Obviously if you don't drink at all, that's that, have the coffee instead, but I don't think a glass at a daytime party is any less noble than a glass in the evening

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I think if you have to ask the question about whether it is an appropriate time to drink then it possibly isn’t.

I don’t think that you should give a flying whatever about whether adults would expect alcohol when it is a kids party.

Also the parents aren’t celebrating, the kids are, the parents are the people driving them to the event.

OneLoneGazelle · 22/10/2026 15:30

Sunbringer · 22/10/2026 14:57

Sigh. As a teetotal person I have to say I would be a bit annoyed by this. To attend a young child’s soft play party - somewhere I’d assume people would drink tea or soft drinks and have a natter - and suddenly everyone but me is drinking alcohol. Great. Now I’m the only sober person watching the children.

It’s quite othering sometimes and I accept that there will be alcohol at adult events and pubs and restaurants and adult parties and awards nights and Christmas dos.. but does it also have to be at a 5 year olds birthday party?

Edited

This is such a dramatic take. Firstly, not everyone will take up the offer. Doesn’t mean it’s not nice to offer it for those that would enjoy it. Secondly, no one is getting hammered on a glass of champagne or prosecco, they will all be quite capable of supervising their own kids without your input.

SirChenjins · 22/10/2026 15:45

Kingdomofsleep · 22/10/2026 14:39

Surely you're agreeing with me here. Outside London this "just isn't a thing". Ie it is cultural. Within London, and in some other countries (i gave Greece as a possible example, I have also been to children's parties in France as a child) it is a thing.

In France and in Greece they also use cars. It isn't a logistical thing. Car use only prevents the driver from drinking.

My ILs live in a village up north. No one uses a car within the village, it's all walkable. They were just as astonished when I first offered them wine at my dc's first party, as some commenters on here.

Another aspect is the drop off thing - there are simply fewer adults at children's parties here (see also, my point above about expecting it to be grimly endured). In some other cultures, a child's birthday is something for everyone to celebrate, all generations, if you're going to celebrate it at all.

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No, I'm not agreeing. You're saying it's clearly cultural, I'm saying it's far more to do with logistics. My European friends (yes, we have them up here too) wouldn't drink during the day either, given that soft play parties are usually only driveable. Given that car sharing will include the adult driver, the adult passenger (if an second adult does need to attend - as they get older it's more usually one adult who will take the children and another will pick up at the end) and a car with 3 children max in it, we're only talking about half the adults at most who would be drinking.

If it's a party at a walkable hall or someone's house, then obviously more people may have a glass of something - but soft play (as per the OP) logistics will usually preclude that.

Kingdomofsleep · 22/10/2026 22:20

Boreded · 22/10/2026 15:09

I think if you have to ask the question about whether it is an appropriate time to drink then it possibly isn’t.

I don’t think that you should give a flying whatever about whether adults would expect alcohol when it is a kids party.

Also the parents aren’t celebrating, the kids are, the parents are the people driving them to the event.

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This perfectly illustrates the point I made above "In some other cultures, a child's birthday is something for everyone to celebrate, all generations, if you're going to celebrate it at all."

Other people such as this pp - a child's birthday is not something adults expect to feel celebratory about. I do think that's a shame and the children do pick up on it. Not that I'm saying alcohol is essential but this mindset is worse.

Sunbringer · 22/10/2026 22:34

OneLoneGazelle · 22/10/2026 15:30

This is such a dramatic take. Firstly, not everyone will take up the offer. Doesn’t mean it’s not nice to offer it for those that would enjoy it. Secondly, no one is getting hammered on a glass of champagne or prosecco, they will all be quite capable of supervising their own kids without your input.

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Nobody will be bladdered but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect people and I can’t see it. I just think it totally changes the vibe and it doesn’t just other me… Muslim parents may also find it off putting and may not attend again.

Boreded · 23/10/2026 01:18

Kingdomofsleep · 22/10/2026 22:20

This perfectly illustrates the point I made above "In some other cultures, a child's birthday is something for everyone to celebrate, all generations, if you're going to celebrate it at all."

Other people such as this pp - a child's birthday is not something adults expect to feel celebratory about. I do think that's a shame and the children do pick up on it. Not that I'm saying alcohol is essential but this mindset is worse.

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🙄

Cla7 · 23/10/2026 07:06

One thing this thread made me realise, people have very different interpretations of ‘having a drink’. I think in circles where drinking alcohol doesn’t mean getting wasted or at least tipsy, it doesn’t seem a concern to have a glass around children.

NerrSnerr · 23/10/2026 07:31

Sunbringer · 22/10/2026 14:57

Sigh. As a teetotal person I have to say I would be a bit annoyed by this. To attend a young child’s soft play party - somewhere I’d assume people would drink tea or soft drinks and have a natter - and suddenly everyone but me is drinking alcohol. Great. Now I’m the only sober person watching the children.

It’s quite othering sometimes and I accept that there will be alcohol at adult events and pubs and restaurants and adult parties and awards nights and Christmas dos.. but does it also have to be at a 5 year olds birthday party?

Edited

I don’t drink either but wouldn’t care if people are offered a glass of wine. You are leaping from them having one glass each to everyone being wasted. The OP is talking about offering them one glass, not a whole bottle each.

It’s not ‘othering’. You will chat to the parents exactly the same whether they’re having alcohol or coffee, there isn’t any difference.

tripleginandtonic · 23/10/2026 07:40

BasketBag · 20/10/2026 20:14

It's normal around here when parties are at home or in a church hall, however I think most soft plays wouldn't allow it. Worth checking though.

This

runnerducky · 23/10/2026 07:43

I don’t think the concept in itself is weird but I think most people’s lives just aren’t like this nowadays in most places. I don’t know many people who want a drink at 10am or early afternoon, which is when most of these soft play or whatever parties tend to be, a lot of people have driving to do during the day and we are in Scotland which is very low tolerance for drink-driving so that’s changed the landscape a lot around just having one and driving or even drinking earlier in the day and driving later. And I think people drink a lot less generally now honestly, I was a pretty typical binge drinker in my early 20s, would go out and sink loads on a night out. I don’t touch alcohol now really and wouldn’t have a random drink in the middle of the day at a kid’s party. I’d rather have a proper coffee!

So I think it’s maybe a bit of a relic of a different age of parenting in a way in a lot of places. When I was a kid, alcohol was more commonplace at kids parties for sure.

RampantIvy · 23/10/2026 07:47

thisismeithinkorisit · 20/10/2026 20:17

have you checked if the venue are ok with this? I do think it's odd tbh, apart from won't most people be driving

When DD went to soft play parties it was always at least a 20 minute drive to a soft play place so no-one would be drinking. Drinks would be tea/coffee or a soft drink.

I think most of us bought our own as well.