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Parties/celebrations

Whether you're planning a birthday or a hen do, you'll find plenty of ideas for your celebration on our Party forum.

Original poster

Party invitation says "No need to bring a present"

281 replies

FrannyandZooey · 13/03/2007 14:55

If you got an invitation with this on, what would you think about it? And would you take a present, or not?

OP posts:
Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:13

I don't know what Aitch means

oh dear VVV is posting conciliatory things does that mean there has been an Actual Ruck?

OP posts:
Greensleeves · 14/03/2007 20:14

I didn't realise you were actually really wound up about it, you are too witty for your own good

Are there people being invited for whom you think buying a present might be a problem? To the extent that they might have to decline the invitation? If that is the case then I would have a word individually and say "No need to bother about presents, it will just be lovely to see you". If not, I would just send out the invitations and let people make their own minds up.

ghosty · 14/03/2007 20:14

Franny - have got to your post of 19.48 ...
I know what you mean.

I would read your invitation as "No need to bring a present, but if you want to that's ok"

And I would bring one. Not to "not appear mean" as some people are saying - I think that is a crap reason to NOT bring a present. I would bring a present because I WANTED to ... I like giving presents ...

Greensleeves · 14/03/2007 20:14

And VVV, fuck off!

LazyLine · 14/03/2007 20:14

Maybe you could put :

"We didn't know what to say about presents so here you go...."

Attach a print out of this conversation?

Ceolas · 14/03/2007 20:14

"No need to bother about presents, it will just be lovely to see you".

I like that wording if you were going to...

PeachyClair · 14/03/2007 20:15

Ah see my Dh is well trained- he asks me why I ahven't consulted MN about stuff- actually its starting to annoy me-a s if Ic an't make a deciosn on my own!

PArties are a huge minefield and some of the acquired rituals are bizarre- for instance, in Somerset you get cake at the party: here you get cake in the bag. But you get pudding. ANd in Somerset party bags come with a thank you ntoe iin, whereas here they go out two weeks alter written in own hand by scarily hot housed four year olds.

And here they don't have games, but always get a professional party palce to do them

At home they're always in houses like in the good old days (though after 15 5 year old boys once won't repeat that agaiN!!)

VeniVidiVickiQV · 14/03/2007 20:15

LOL, not at all. I'm just angling for an invite to a party where I dont have to buy a present, that will entertain my two for a few hours

Gobbledigook · 14/03/2007 20:16

I personally would not put that on an invitation for a child.

If I received an invitation with this on (or rather, if my ds did) I'd probably buy a book or a book token, or perhaps some paper/colouring book and pencils. I don't think I could buy nothing for a child's birthday.

ghosty · 14/03/2007 20:16

I have a good friend who says EVERY year "No need to bring a present" for her DCs ...
I always take one .... because I want to.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 14/03/2007 20:16
Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:24

No it is really that we are inviting quite a lot of people, not all of whom we know terribly well, because I thought it would be a nice way to get to know them better

and one or two of them are just people that ds likes (possibly reciprocated and possibly NOT) who haven't got children and who will be doing us a huge favour if they even bother to turn up. I mean people like a local artist that he likes and always has great chats with. I thought she might like to come and have a drink and a piece of cake with us but I would be embarrassed if she brought a present.

People who are short of money usually make something, I think? Which is lovely.

OP posts:
Spidermama · 14/03/2007 20:25

When I told them of your plans to write 'Don't feel the need to bring a present' F&Z, my kids have just gasped, their jaws dropped, they said 'That's cruel' and 'You must give presents'.

Now I'm dictating for my 8 year old dd ...'If the child has to suffer the experience of not having presents in a party then they should definitely ring Childline.'

From the mouths of babes ...

Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:25

Oh sorry that was a reply to Greeny

the phone rang in between so I am getting left behind

OP posts:
Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:26

Spider was it cruel for the giver or the receiver, do you think?

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NurseyJo · 14/03/2007 20:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:30

NO I WILL BE KEEPING ALL THE PRESENTS

we like presents

LOL at people's insistence that this is a ploy on my part to deprive ds of presents

OP posts:
satinshoes · 14/03/2007 20:30

sounds like it will be a lovely party franny

i think like someone said 'presents optional' is better than 'no need to bring a present' but personally i would still give out the invites with nothing on and then speak to people individually and say there is no need to bring anything.

ghosty · 14/03/2007 20:32

I agree with Spidie
If I even suggested that people didn't bring presents DS would leave home. He is 7.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 14/03/2007 20:37

So, tell, what food are you doing for the party?

Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 14/03/2007 20:40

Oh VVV that is a whole other thread

I can do entertainment for any number of people but I cannot cater for large numbers

I will start the "oh help party foooooooood hellllllllllllllp" thread in about 3 days I would think

OP posts:
Ceolas · 14/03/2007 20:41

Why don't you ask them to bring food instead of a present then, Franny?

harpsichordcarrier · 14/03/2007 20:42

aren't parties fun, everyone??

recoveringmum · 14/03/2007 20:44

i think its so weird. children love to get presents at their birthdays it makes them feel special. it doesnt mean they need to receive expensive toys, can be home made, but still, presents presents presents!

VeniVidiVickiQV · 14/03/2007 20:45

May I ask, why you are having such a huge party then?

It seems like it is acting out one of your worst nightmares.

If you have a small gathering then you wont be inundated with presents, you wont have to worry about etiquette, and you wont have to cater for huge numbers of people.