Thread 42 Corona GCSE Cohort - 👻Creeping it Real for Oct22

[CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.

previous thread

@crazycrofter that is why lots of the more 'studenty' churches do evening services! My dd is enjoying the quieter morning services as they always do a student lunch afterwards and it is one less day to have to decide what to cook 🙂. Although I think she is enjoying her time at university, she finds the relentlessness of 'adulting' hard. I had forgotten what a shock it was to have to suddenly make all these mundane decisions like what to eat, when to go shopping etc..

Adulting is hard @handmademitlove . I remember at uni spending all Sunday with church people, being fed and looked after!

Dd really enjoyed the church she went to in the evening and they fed them with pizza afterwards! She even met a girl who was one of her best friends when she was 4-6; dd left that school in year 2 and hasn’t seen the friend since!

Ds isn't happy with his new piano teacher. It didn't help that he really clicked with the previous one who he only had for two weeks and being autistic that is a big thing for him. He feels the techniques the new one is asking him to use are not working and are causing pain. Ds is hypermobile and i think has developed workarounds for certain things (handwriting causes him pain too). I've told him to give it a chance and to speak to the teacher about his specific issues.

In other news he was going to go and visit his bandmates in Manchester for reading week but now is heading further north instead as he has been engaged to play for a week long run of an amdram musical. He's booked a very cheap (and possibly dodgy eek) room for the week above a pub.

@AnneOfCleavage yes my dd is loving life in Winchester. She has made a nice group of friends and settled in well. The course is going well so far although it's a full timetable and there is a lot of work - reading and assignments as well as preparing to go into school after reading week. Funny to think that the girls your dd met at interview might be friends with my dd now. How is your dd spending her gap year?

DD also finding adulting relentless but told me she’s enjoying it. In good news DSA have recommended that an alternative provider for both mentors is needed and now awaiting approval from SFE though not sure how long this will all take or whether it will be approved but it’s progress. In not so good news Personal independence payment mandatory reconsideration turned down so now trying to decide whether the hassle of a tribunal is worth it.

Lovely to read everyone’s updates.

@Oblomov22 not maths but ds's year 1 teacher. I think he taught the full year. I was emailed another article in more detail. The chap had super imposed himself into images of children. He'd got dolls in his house, lots of children's underwear (no children of his own) all quite shocking really.

I have had quite a few texts conversations with Ds. He's just not wanting to FaceTime. He's booked the train home fri 4th nov. in the evening. Then returning Sunday. So I have that to look forward to.

Now I need to go back and catch up with everyone's new.

I'm having a massive guilt day. All you lot visiting dc, dc coming home. I know I should be happy he's happy and settled but I still feel guilty. Because he's working Saturday and Sunday he couldn't come home even if he wanted.

(Not that my mum ever visited me. Not that it even occurred to me that she should. How times change).

"Wait you have a job? Wow that is so cute" "Don't you have a student loan?"
Said a boarding school boy, who said he didn't think people got jobs till they were an adult.
🤣

Hahaha @Oblomov22 , he doesn’t realise he’s officially an adult at 18 then?!!

Don’t feel guilty about not visiting. We’ve only seen dd because of the job interview!

@Oblomov22 we had the excuse of a family wedding to collect DS and take him away for the weekend. Now's he's flu free, he doesn't want to know me 😭. I called him yesterday and he said he was going for dinner and would call back. I texted him later as he hadn't called and he said he was so busy and everyone wanted to talk to him - me, his sister and (not)gf. He didn't speak to me or DD so I'm guessing gf won his precious time 🤣 I do know he's suddenly doing a lot of clubbing. He messaged me to say he'd run out of data, was in the city centre and could I top his phone up. The message came through at 6.30am 😱 He says he sent it at 11pm 🤔 I'm happy he's seemingly more settled but it would be nice to chat, and not just when he needs money.

Ours has settled into a long weekly call routine now. I felt so hurt when she wasn’t contacting us at all. But I think she may have needed to separate from us in order to do it all. She said she has been very homesick but now understands it comes in waves. She has also been Ill, but didn’t tell us. She really is trying so hard. She has a reading week at the end of October and may come home for part of it.

@Oblomov22 we haven’t seen DS either and have only spoken to him on the phone twice. DH has had a face time call but that was for tech support.
he has reading week 7th November so I’m hoping he’ll come back then

He does text us most days though, even if it’s just a photo of his food

We get texts or messages every day and he does video WhatsApp every Saturday but won’t be visiting until we collect in December. He seems happy and settled so will leave him to it!

@kiwiandcherries that is wonderful news. So glad it's going well and she has got a lovely group of friends. Yes, the timetable does sound full on for primary teaching and will be the same at Chichester Uni. Will your DD come home for reading week? Seems they'll need all that week to catch up on assignments and reading. I can't remember any names of the girls that DD met and i know we didn't meet your DD as she interviewed on a different week to us.

Thanks for asking after her. DD went back to visit Chichester on their open day a couple of weeks back so got to see some accommodation. She's loving her gap year and has a few p/t jobs all of which are to do with children and/or teaching so is getting vital experience whilst also getting paid. Is hoping to pass her driving test and has her theory test coming up and is also continuing with her dancing and musical theatre classes so is kept pretty busy. Both DH and I have elderly and not well parents (x4) so she is getting to spend time with them too. We both are kept very busy helping and looking after them and are most definitely the sandwich generation that DD with her sociology class terminology goes on about. This thread is v good for my sanity and i am out tonight with a good friend so will have lots of wine to unwind 😀

Oh dear - just had a 2hr call with DD in tears. She's still not over her flu, got a UTI over the weekend so had to fight her way through OOH drs to get antibiotics (she regularly gets them and so far drs not really helped). She is exhausted, finding adulting as well as uni work really tough. I don't think she's really made any friends - her course doesn't really help as she doesn't have any two lectures with the same people.
I think I've calmed her down, organised an online shop with her, and reminded her she's only got to get to the end of the week when she has an unofficial reading week. We go up to visit for the end of this - I think it will be mainly spent doing washing, cooking etc.
It's hard 🙁

They have had to change ds's piano teacher due to hours/timetabling issues and he hasn't clicked with the new one who is says is too classical and the techniques he has been getting ds to use are making his wrists hurt (not ache, hurt) in the same way it hurts when he handwrites (he is allowed to use a laptop for all writing). He loved the first teacher he was allocated. Change for an autistic person isn't good.

He isn't coming home for reading week, he's off up further north to play in the band for am amdram show. He's got to take his keyboard on a train and a bus and he's booked himself a cheap, hopefully not too dodgy hotel.

I've got an oh dear too. DS just texted to say he hates his course and he would do anything just to do history. We had misgivings after the offer older day and I wish I had made him change stuff then.

He says it's chaotic in organisation, they are treated like an afterthought, have twice the workload of everyone else, the social research is dull, and the maths is too hard.

Gosh Seeline, Piggy, really sorry to hear the courses aren’t living up to expectation. Though I guess Seeline she just needs to gel with just one as a start point from each aspect of the lib arts programme, that it’s the lack of friendships vs the course itself?

Comefromaway, fingers crossed that he finds some common ground with the new one. I can’t imagine how painful the piano is if made to adjust technique so much that it exacerbates hyper mobility.

I think there is a learning point here about these mixed courses like Liberal Arts or PPE... I wish I could time travel.

Piggy has he asked if he can change? It is really worth trying. It is likely someone from history will have dropped out/not turned up - he can’t do 3 years of his current degree if he hates it already…

@Piggywaspushed I'm listening with interest regarding mixed courses as that's exactly what DD is about to apply for. In her case Global Development or International Development. Basically Human Geography and International Relations.. At Kent the same course (pretty much) is just called Human Geography but still has modules from Politics and IR.
DS already has a timetable clash with French and Law but otherwise that seems to be going okay.

I also have a DD looking at mixed courses - it's very unhelpful that they don't make clear just how they work.

He has sent emails and I unearthed a form.

On the UTI/OOO doctor thing, I didnt realise that you can now get antibiotics for them from Boots without a prescription with an online form - only a short course and not if it has got to kidneys etc but oh the small dance of joy I did...

I did a Joint Honours course and loved it (when I wasn't cursing the workload). But it wasn't just "half of one and half of the other", it included some special 'bridging' modules just for the JH people. I gather those are really rare, though.

DD and classmates have, now they've been in classes for a month, been allowed to decorate the First Year Illustration Studios (which get whitewashed every summer). As below, plus a couple of the doodles she's contributed to the walls so far.