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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

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Thread 40 - Corona Cohort , Falling into Autumn 🍂

983 replies

CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee · 14/09/2022 07:43

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and support to be had !

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EspeciallyDivided · 18/09/2022 23:43

I decided to distract myself from missing DS today and drove over to Windsor (its not too far from here) to pay my respects to The Queen. It was busy but very well organised, a lovely respectful atmosphere around the castle.

Glad to hear so many have moved successfully now, hoping friendships will be forming and bearings found in due course.

DS phoned me this afternoon and booked a slot for tomorrow afternoon to call again and sort out some admin. He had gone out to a quieter country pub with some other students who had a car last night. So maybe not gone off the rails yet Grin. When I was his age I used to spend a lot of time with friends in old fashioned pubs, the big town centre ones weren't really a thing then <old gimmer>

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 06:48

AAARGH!

Went into the bathroom that DSs use at home last night and found his hairbrush and his bloody retainers!! They are not something I want to post much - very expensive issue if he doesn't get them....

He also left his hairbrush.

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 07:03

Oh no @Piggywaspushed how annoying. The sagas we have had with thought-to-be-lost twin block braces and retainers over the years make me shudder.

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 07:08

Well, quite. Not something you want to get lost in post. DS1's Lincoln halls had a reception and postal collection. Birmingham doesn't have this. Hopefully, they are small enough to plop through letterbox.

This got me to thinking what a mad job being post person at a campus uni is! Chamberlain Tower in Birmingham is huge and every flat gets post delivered.

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 07:33

DS used to play football somewhere 30 miles away on a Sunday and would dump his twin blocks in the cupholder of my car while he played. We got home one day and one was missing, searched the whole car, drive, house. Nothing and it was getting dark. Next day I phoned the clubhouse as I knew exactly where I had parked and a kind lady went out and looked. Nothing. I left work early and drove up there only to find the only car in the entire car park was parked where we had been. Peered under it (unfortunately the surface was light coloured gravel) - nothing. Car owner was summoned and reversed out of the space, it took a couple of minutes but I found them, intact. The relief was immense. Partly due to covid and partly due to sensory issues DS's orthodontic treatment has been extremely protracted and time consuming (and expensive). The thought of losing them nearly finished me off. Then there was the time DD threw hers in the kitchen bin with a load of orange peelings. That caused hours of searching too.

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 07:37

No one warns you of brace related trauma , do they?

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 07:51

He is already up. Has texted me his Wordle and Yeardle results!

He is having a shower and then off to find breakfast.

I think today could be tuogh for them all with nothing really open and lost of stuff cancelled or shouted to Tuesday.

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 07:53

Honestly, DD's was a breeze apart from the bin episode. NHS, straightfoward, quick appointments, just about all done before Covid. DS's has gone on for about 4 years now and each appointment seems to last at least an hour. His orthodontist is lovely but I will be SO glad when its over. Hopefully by Christmas, he's got his next appt in reading week. Hope the retainers get back safely @Piggywaspushed

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 07:54

Yes, it's going to be a weird day for them all with nothing open.

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 07:54

I wish you could edit MN posts. So many typos...Blush

NCTDN · 19/09/2022 08:04

Dd has things on after 5 today I think.
I'm feeling weepy today even though when we left her yesterday I was ok.

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 08:05

Grin. I did wordle every day for months (I share it in a messenger group and we sometimes all do it at lunchtime at work). About a month ago I hit a wall with it and just couldn't do it any more, I reckon it was all the results/uni/college stress. Starting to get it again now. Never tried yeardle.

EspeciallyDivided · 19/09/2022 08:06

hugs @NCTDN and anyone else feeling emotional. I held it together till bedtime after leaving DS last week.

PhotoDad · 19/09/2022 08:09

I lost my Wordle stats when I moved to using a new laptop, and haven't really got back into it again! Good luck with adapting to changes.

Agree, it's an odd day with everything shut; my DD is probably going to go out for a walk (we got her a book of self-guided tours of Cambridge as she loves local history and architecture).

Meanwhile, DW is away at a conference, DS has just thrown up (we tidied up and he's now back in bed), and I'm down with a heavy cold. Survival is the order of the day!

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 08:18

Oh the joys of retainers! DD1 broke hers at uni, costing me £90 to replace and she had to come home to get a remould done.
DD2 had braces until sixth form over Covid. 10 months between appointment to remove them! I nearly took the pliers to them myself.They’re very good at wearing the retainers at night and have beautiful smiles so it was worth it in the end .
I’m full of cold @PhotoDad . Wondering where I can get a Covid test today. What is open?

Oblomov22 · 19/09/2022 08:23

Piggy that retainers thing hit home with me. I ordered 2 sets for both my ds's when they finished their braces this summer. I'm battling a lot with ds2 to get him to wear his!

Oblomov22 · 19/09/2022 08:25

Benji I really hope they emerge from their rooms for your dd!

kiwiandcherries · 19/09/2022 08:26

NCTDN · 19/09/2022 08:04

Dd has things on after 5 today I think.
I'm feeling weepy today even though when we left her yesterday I was ok.

This is how I was. I think the day itself was busy and we were focused on getting through it but then the next day the reality hits you a bit. It's ok to feel emotional though, it's a big change. I'm just giving myself permission to feel what I feel whenever I feel it!

Oblomov22 · 19/09/2022 08:29

Laughing at ED and her bin Orange peelings searching. I lost a tiny part of my diabetic insulin pump and searched through bin after a Sunday roast - potato peelings, parsnip and carrot, gravy over everything. Never did find it.

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 08:30

DD was getting ready to go over to another accommodation last night as invited by a friend of her bf. She went into the kitchen before left and the other girl was there with two friends. They invited her to have a drink so she did. It’s a start. The other lad has a post grad gf who lives in the city and spends lots of time at hers apparently. I am so proud of DD, she is way out of her comfort zone but is trying. In my heart I feel it’s not the uni/campus for her but only she can decide .

PhotoDad · 19/09/2022 08:30

@Benjispruce4 Not much use to you today but I got some Covid tests in our Tesco delivery to keep some on hand. I know we're not meant to test any more but I'd feel guilty spreading it around school. I hope to be back tomorrow, and am dosing up with Lemsip!

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 08:31

I have to test if symptoms (primary school) and if positive stay home for 5 days.

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 08:32

benji branches of Boots are opening later. I have a huge stockpile of covid tests form DH and my school. No use to you though! Sent DS off with two boxes.

One thing I do know about NTU - really brilliant SU, and wellbeing services are excellent , if needed.

PhotoDad · 19/09/2022 08:32

My DD is one of those sitting in her room in the evenings, oops! But she has at least gone out during the day with a course-mate, shopping and coffee/cake. I think she'll meet more people through student societies, which start next week.

Piggywaspushed · 19/09/2022 08:34

I keep hearing 'not meant to test'. No rules... a SLT said this to me and I nearly shouted at her.

DS had Covid the other week and even his 80 year old granddaughter said 'what did you test him for?'. Ermmmm... social responsibility?? Due to spend time at a concert with 70 year olds? That kind of thing?

Sorry, photodad not having a go at you , more at government messaging.