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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

Original poster

Do you miss your children being little?

97 replies

Sarahjane789 · 12/02/2021 14:29

Do you think about your adult children now and really wish you could turn back time to when they were small and cute? Or are you happy that that part of your life is over?

OP posts:
MonochromeMinnie · 27/02/2021 22:23

Definitely not. Small children are hard work and such a worry. I now have a wonderful relationship with my adult children and am now a granny with daughter and grandchild living with me for the time being, so I'm doing it all again anyway!

Ragwort · 27/02/2021 22:25

No ... perfectly happy now that DS is independent and making his own way in the world.

Rosieredapples · 27/02/2021 22:27

Yes so so much, mostly when they are being a pain or unreasonable teens. I miss their tiny teeth and squeaky voices, I miss their little hands in mine. I miss their wonder and joy at the simplest things.
All things considered though I do not miss the spellings homework or teaching them to tie shoe laces and definitely not the sleepless nights.
I'd love a time machine to just relive some of their lovely moneys again.

Chickydoo · 27/02/2021 22:30

I love them as adults, really miss the little years though. They were exhausting but such fun. Actually my whole life was wonderful back then. Things change.

Haggisfish · 27/02/2021 22:31

No I like them getting older just as much.

WillowintheUK · 27/02/2021 22:38

I’m incredibly proud of the adults my children have become, I adore my grandchildren, but I just loved the time when I was bringing them up and life was just so busy and happy. I’d go back in a heartbeat.

plinkplinkfizzer · 27/02/2021 22:39

God yes . they were soo funny , and smelt cute . My youngest when about 2 or 3 used to try to emerge from a tantrum with dignity , by snailing along the floor to a corner , cover with a blanket , then emerge a few minutes later like nothing had happened . Toilet training , dancing in puddles of wee . Peeing in the dog bowl .
I do hope they experience the joys of toddlers with good humour .

whenwillthemadnessend · 27/02/2021 22:43

Mine are teens so not adult but no. I like the age they are now. I've never been one to look back tho generally Always move forwards in life

tsmainsqueeze · 27/02/2021 22:53

Yes i do , i have a two sons 22 and 24 , i would like to go back to when they were between 9 and 13ish.
The mr kipling add with the brother taking a cake for his sister reminds me so much of my 22 year old i could cry .
I have a 12 year old daughter who is far more emotionally intelligent than my boys were at her age , at the moment i don't wish her younger , she's lovely as she is , may change my mind over the next few years !

ArcheryAnnie · 27/02/2021 22:54

Oh yes. I adore my adult son and would not have him change for the world. But i'd like to have him cloned, so I could have 4 year old him with me too.

pinkprosseco · 20/06/2021 04:00

Yes I miss those days. I loved our family holidays and days out and all eating together and chatting about our day. They've all left home now and we rarely get together as a family due to busy lives and two have partners etc. I really miss it.

GlamGiraffe · 20/06/2021 04:18

Given my 19 year old has currently turned into a horrible monster with a severed atiitude problem whi thinks he lives in a hotel; is rude, has a temper and thinks he doesnt beling to family life, i think the answer is pretty obvious
My daughter was 4 this week,and the things whe believes and says are just a pricess source of enchanting entertainment for us - the sheer innocence! The level of destruction is pretty signucant but I'll take that over the strops ayy day!

Shav73 · 22/09/2021 15:26

In a heartbeat. I loved it so much, I love it now having adult children who I am really close to BUT it's the feeling of being needed, really needed that I miss.

GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman · 22/09/2021 15:42

Ummm... I recently reread part of a diary I kept when mine were little, in particular an entry when they were 7, 4 and 2.

I somehow managed to get the older two where they had to be one morning, despite the toddler being horrendous (not sure how, probably involved putting on her wellies in the lobby and stamping dried mud off on a clean floor, or trying to hand-feed the cat, or something. Or, knowing her, several somethings). She then (so I read) continued being horrendous around Sainsbury's (screaming, possibly), then as I unpacked the shopping she got into the bathroom and got hair conditioner all over herself, requiring a shower and a complete change of clothes. I then started on the housework, only to discover that she was in the kitchen, eating newly-bought eclairs (which she had made some serious efforts to obtain), and had cream and icing all over her clean clothes and her clean hair.

It was 10.20 a.m.

So yeah, I did enjoy my DC when they were younger, and loved cuddling up and reading stories, and watching them play in the bath, and shrieking on the swings, but I remember stuff like that and honestly, no wonder I was knackered.

MsTSwift · 22/09/2021 15:44

Christ no. But I was a sahm for 7 years until they went to school think I overdid the small child thing the thought of doing it again fills me with utter dread!

MsTSwift · 22/09/2021 15:45

Loving young teen stage sooo much more fun!

Shav73 · 22/09/2021 15:54

Yeh I agree with that 100%, teens til now (well two days ago!), which is empty nest as youngest ds just left for uni have been my favourite years. It was fab, all the rushing around, the banter, the love, the noise, the tears as they made mistakes and learnt and keep moving forward. Hands down. The happiest of times.

PermanentTemporary · 22/09/2021 16:03

Noooooo never. Ds was great and really the most straightforward and fun kid, but Lord it was hard going a lot of the time.

I do remember that he held my hand walking around until he was 7. I absolutely loved that except when he whinged and pulled on my arm during walks and used to hold my breath for the last few months because I knew we were on borrowed time with it.

expatmigrant · 22/09/2021 16:12

I have really enjoyed watching my two growing through each phase. DD now through university, working and in a stable relationship. Mind she was a right little cow as a teenager, more to me than DH. So I don't miss that bit. DS now negotiating his way to growing up, at university, first relationship etc. He's a really interesting young man and I love his company. I do miss not spending so much time with him and spoil him way too much when he's home.
Also, do not miss arranging of birthday parties and playdates, GCSE's and Alevels. Glad those days are behind us.

Bythemillpond · 22/09/2021 16:12

I loved every age of my children but when they were little we had a fantastic time.

They can’t really remember everything in detail. But know what ever they did they knew they had a brilliant time.

Teenagedream · 22/09/2021 16:50

Yes absolutely would love to go back. I had boy /girl twins and they were a delight. My mum and dad were alive to help and we all had a fab time. I cry when I think of it.
Wish I could go back and experience some of it again.

weegiemum · 22/09/2021 16:53

Mine are 21,19,17.

If I could go back and do it again with good mental health, I would.

AuntieMarys · 22/09/2021 16:56

No! I hated the neediness. Glad they are adults, working and nowhere nearby!!!

HungryHippo11 · 22/09/2021 16:58

Aw this thread has made me sad. Mine are only 4 and 1 and I already feel like they're growing up too fast 😭

ssd · 22/09/2021 17:00

@AuntieMarys

No! I hated the neediness. Glad they are adults, working and nowhere nearby!!!
Christ i couldn't be more opposite if i tried.

I wouldn't like the broken nights again. But i miss them squeezing up to me on the couch. Or lying beside them in bed reading them a story. And being called mummy.