What age can you leave alone in the house

[darcymum]

My children are all very little ages 4.5, 3 and 20 months. The shop in my village is just over 1 minutes walk away, what age would you leave the eldest child alone in the house while I ran to the shop?

At our school yr 6's walk younger siblings to school from yr one up

at 5/6 she wouldn't be emotionally mature enough to cope with anything out of the ordinary happening?

So if you fainted with a three year old in the house or if you fell down the stairs or any not normal accidental adult being unwakable - the children often do know what to do and really you should go through things with little ones, for example how to use the phone and get help but only if mummy or daddy not able to wake up.

how often are you alone with the children in the house?

I do think children are a lot more sensible than we give them credit for.

If we lived in India she would be working in a sweat shop making clothes for Primark by now.

BTW, I'm not suggesting that's a good thing.

Actually at 6 my dd1 was feeding and changing nappies for her sister, I know a lot of adults that would not be able to deal with changing a dirty, opposed to wet, nappy...

dd1 was also playing out at 6 years old, with other dc in the street and on a green outside our house.

My dh leaves our 9, 7 and 5 yr olds alone to come and collect me from work (10 min round trip) They are all extremely sensible and wouldn't dream of doing anything even vaguely naughty whilst the parents were out. I hadn't thought I would do this, many years ago. It depends on the kids.

darcy in some countries at 6 the parents are dead and gone and a family of only young siblings are left to fend for themselves, hardship that I wouldn't wish on any child but they do somehow survive

"When I look back, at 3, my sis was 6 and bro 9. We used to tear out of the house at 9am, back for lunch and then out again until 530pm! My mum could have sodded off anywhere! She didn't, but she knew we were safe. We were hardly ever in view and often my siblings just ran off and left me. No harm came to me.
Also I started walking to school on my own at 5/6ish. I don't think mum lost any sleep over it." Sounds wonderful Springythingy

The main reason life isn't like that for children any more is because we wont let it be, which I think is a shame. They may have faced some risks by I think the benefits are enormous.

Dh has just come home and he said he thinks he might leave her alone now to go to the shop.

I do think that over the years we have become far too inclined to wrap our kids in cotton wool. However......I would almost be more worried about what could happen to me when out than leaving the children for 2 mins.God forbid I should be knocked down/have a stroke etc etc.I know it is extremely unlikely but we all know whether our children can be trusted or not-but what happens if we don't come back?

this has to be a wind up surely?? Leaving a 4.5 year old alone in the house?? Chances of anything happening are slim, but how would you/he ever forgive yourselves if anything did happen??

I should say that I am not condoning leaving children of these ages...was more a general comment.

But the shop would only be three minutes round trip. Do you think our parents who allowed us much more freedom than we allow our children were neglectful?

4 is a baby, it would be neglect.
I recently started leaving my very mature and sensible 12 year old for a short time. We live in a rural area so if I go out it's a car journey away. We went through what he should and shouldn't do and he was happy to be left.
Unfortunately I had't thought of every possible scenario. I got a tearful phone call from a frightened DS because a courier had knocked on the door at 6pm to deliver a parcel. The man was very persistant and DS didn't know what to say to him. I rushed home to find him hiding and sobbing.

it is amazing how times change

my mother used to go out to work in the evenings when I was barely 8, leaving me in charge of my younger siblings

this was the 70's though

It was wonderful Darcymum...I remember my childhood as being long, hot and summery. Climbing trees, getting grubby knees, scrapping with my sister and feeling oh so safe all the time.
When DS started walking to school at 9yo, he was one of the 1st. One mum was so that she told me I was irresponsible. She said "What if someone took him!" All the while her 4yo was racing off down the road in a bid for freedom. I simply said "Who's that talking to DS?" It took her at least 3 minutes to find him!
I do think we need to give our DCs more credit. 4.5 IS too little to be left in the house but if she is sensible enough, I don't think it'll be long before she can cope with 3 minutes alone. The poster that exclaimed: She doesn't need to feel grown up because she isn't, I disagree. If a child is asking for more responsibility, it is the parents duty to look for was to award it. Maybe that's 3 minutes alone in the house, maybe its doing more 'grown up chores'. Darcymum I applaud you for being so brave!
And in case anyone else doesn't want to red the thread SHE ISN'T SUGGESTING SHE LEAVES A 4.5 Y O ALONE!!!!

The end of our garden is 55 seconds walk away.

I have been leaving DCs alone in the house to nip to the compost heap since youngest was 3.

I now go outside and garden while they are playing indoors, checking on them every 20 mins or so.

But they know where to find me and there are no roads to cross.

I saw on TV a while ago that a generation ago the average 8 year old was allowed out to play half a mile from home. Now the average 8 year old is not allowed to play outside their own garden. What has happened to us? Are are children less responsible than we were. I know that the amount of traffic has grown hugely but its more than that, we are much more fearful than our parents were.