what would you do in the following scenario

[emkana]

Sunday dinner. ds (3.8) has not touched his plate. After a reasonable amount of time cleared plates are taken away and pudding is brought out. Ds demands pudding.

Would you

a/let him have it
b/insist he eats (some of) his dinner before he has pudding
c/not bring the pudding out in the first place (bearing in mind that there are other children who have eaten)

b - eat dinner or no dessert

If b doesn't work - then no dessert. The rest of the chldren can.

I wouldn't let the others miss out, just because of one child refusing to eat.

My DS is too young for this to apply but my plan is to have yoghurt and fruit as the everyday pudding (which is what I have now)so it's healthy and he can have it whether or not he has eaten 'enough' of his main. Then if it's a special occasion I can turn a blind eye if he prefers to leave room for the tempting puddings.

I don't like the idea of forcing a child to eat things they don't like or maybe don't feel like that day, think that could lead to eating problems latter. I remember being forced to eat vile food my DM had spent time toiling over, and I am now having to retrain myself to try food that I think I don't like.

So my rather long winded answer is A!

When ds2 plays with his dinner he is told "don't worry, you can have it after your bath".
The sad reality that he is not going to proceed straight to cheesecake usually makes him reconsider the idea.
I wouldn't do that is it was something new, though, then he would be offered a dinner alternative I know he likes (peanut butter sandwich!).