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Parenting

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Original poster

My DH calls our DD fat

74 replies

1757 · 08/02/2010 21:45

I am worried about my DHs behaviour towards our teenage daughter

He was a keen sportsman in his youth and felt he could have been successful if he had had the backing. He has encouraged my DD to particpate in sport from a young age but puts a lot of pressure on her to succeed.

Recently he has started getting angry at her when she doesn't do as well as he thinks she could or should do. He often comments on her weight and in extreme anger has called her 'fat'. He has also started criticising her character and is prone to rages and 'flare ups'.

They argue a lot and she is beginning to suffer emotionally. She has cut her arms (although only once and for attention) and spends a lot of time at friends houses. How can I help my family?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/02/2010 15:27

What the bloody hell is wrong with you OP? YOu are just as cuplable as he is in my view. What you are doing to that girl is abusive.

So, she provokes him does she? But he can be a nice father? He calls her fat as 'ecncouragement'.

And you know she cuts herself and she spends a lot of time at friends houses.

WEll I wonder why? With a father like that and a mother who lets it carry on.

As someone who was raised in an abusive household and was told on a regular basis how fat and ugly I was, and as the mother of a teenage daughter I think shame, shame on the both of you.

You need to sort your abusive husband out and you need to make it up to your poor daughter. Poor bloody kid.

This has made me furious on that teenage girl's behalf.

PorphyrophillicPixie · 09/02/2010 15:36

Er, encouragement? Tell him to f off. Calling somebody fat for 'encouragement' is fucking disgraceful and for you to let him carry on is disappointing. If I were your daughter I doubt I'd trust you if I thought (as most teens would think) that you weren't sticking up for me.

Hullygully · 09/02/2010 15:50

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

WhoIsAsking · 09/02/2010 15:56

I've done a search and I am agog.

Hullygully · 09/02/2010 16:00

You don't look like one.

WhoIsAsking · 09/02/2010 16:02

It's this skirt. It's very flattering.

Hullygully · 09/02/2010 16:03

Where is BoF? Is she looking for her deerstalker and Meerschaum?

WhoIsAsking · 09/02/2010 16:08

Hullygully · 09/02/2010 16:14

Come on then, your Gogness. Take the gloves off. Spill.

AnyFucker · 09/02/2010 16:16

err, I don't this Op is all she says she is

AnyFucker · 09/02/2010 16:17

or, she has changed so many details to stay incognito, this whole thread is nonsensical...

BOF...where are ya, girl ?

BitOfFun · 09/02/2010 16:22

You don't need me any more. My work here is done

sarah293 · 09/02/2010 16:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/02/2010 16:29

AnyFucker, BoF - is this another mad troll and I have got riled for no reason?

If it is I am pissed right off. Sick of maniacs (present company excepted ) all over the board.

AnyFucker · 09/02/2010 16:30

well, I dunno, getorf, but fings don't add up....

don't think it's the boxroom though

heQet · 09/02/2010 16:32

OP - your daughter is at risk of developing an eating disorder. Girls DIE from eating disorders.

You have a duty to stop your husband from tormenting - for that is what it is - your daughter. And if he won't listen and you have to choose - choose your daughter.

If she develops anorexia and drops to 4 stone and is hospitalised, or starts to cut so deeply that she has deep, infected scars, you will not be blameless.

Your duty to your child takes priority over your duty to your husband.

I am disgusted that his abusive behaviour is tolerated by you.

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/02/2010 16:33

Is probably going to get to the point where I am only going to answer threads started by someone I 'know'.

Which is a shame but I am so sick of the nutcases which are abounding here at the moment.

AnyFucker · 09/02/2010 16:36

nothing proved getorf, like I said, the OP may have simply changed a lot of details....but to a very large extent

will say no more, am not really a troll-hunter, tbh

an easily-done search reveals a lot, however

heQet · 09/02/2010 16:36

how do you know,how can you possibly know, that this is a troll? I don't understand how people can tell who is telling the truth and who isn't. I say I'm a mum of 2 but I might be a 50yr old sweaty bloke called Fred. How would you ever know?

Hullygully · 09/02/2010 16:38

They have a certain something about them which just shouts the T word.

AnyFucker · 09/02/2010 16:39

heq, well, for a start, your posts don't contradict each other

'nuff said

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/02/2010 16:42

WEll actually I hope that this thread is a load of bollocks and that this poor teenage girl is a figment of someone's imagination.

Bof and Reality are the troll spotters extraordinaire iirc!

sarah293 · 09/02/2010 16:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

heQet · 09/02/2010 16:47

What y'on about riv we could have had a full english down the transport caff, would have been great.

I think I just don't have the radar for it. Or the memory They could contradict themselves one post after another and I'm unlikely to notice.

I can't see it in this thread either.

I'll go back and read again, but I don't hold out much hope

WhoIsAsking · 09/02/2010 16:47

Exactly AF on the search. Very enlightening. And bizarre. And just WTF?

(possibly working through something in the past - so don't want to be too horrible)

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