So what chores do your DC do?

[BigTillyMint]

I have noticed that lots MNers have children who do chores at home and I am looking for ideas and advice.

My DC have to tidy and hoover their own rooms once a week, and will (mostly) lend a hand if asked, but what else could they do?

Oh, and do you pay them for doing chores?

DS1 (4.6) - empties dishwasher and tidies his room. But at the moment he doesn't see these things as chores because he enjoys tidying and sorting things out

DS2 (20mo) - putting tea bags in the tea pot, putting laundry into the tumble drier and getting out the spoons at breakfast time

Don't pay either of them! Yet...

I cannot have regular chores for health reasons, but they do from time to time get asked to do a spot of washing up, setting the table, making me cups of coffee, and helping with cooking.

Dd2 - 14.9
Changes her sheets on her bed once a week,Makes her sarnies every eve 4 next day, Loads the dishwasher after supper every night for £6 a week. Ontop of her 'hard earned money' we also pay for her to go to the gym once a week £2.80 and £6 a week dance lessons and mob phone top ups when necessary.

Thanks!

Anyone else?

Mine are too young for real chores (DD 2.2 and DS 7 months) but I do get DD to help. She usually lays the table for dinner, in as far as she's capable. I get her to put the dirty clothes in the laundry basket for me and she's expected to tidy up her toys (to a certain extent) before bed.

She doesn't get paid, just a reasonable amount of praise.

in theory dd1(11) unloads the dishwasher, she manages 3 or 4 times per week

dd2(9) normally supervises the maths game that dd3(4) gets for homework

they are all supposed top put their own laundry away once I've sorted it into piles, but I have to help dd3(4) and ds(2).

we have jobs lists every weekend, jobs are things like, put all uniform in wash, today bedroom, do homework, laundry away etc. I've also added help Mummy to the list and the girls all have to help me three times (minimum!). Often this is taking things from one floor to another (3 storey house, things always in wrong place!) might also me stripping and making up own beds.

ds 1 (5.10) does his '4 year old job' -putting his plate/bowl on the side to be washed. His '5 year old job' - hanging his coat on the hook + putting his shoes in the cupboard and he also leaves out his washing (We have started a 'leave washing out if you want it done as mummy is not a servant' type arrnagement. We have 3 boys and I don't intend to be scurrying around on bedroom floors searching through foul messes for clothes. Start them young I say!)

ds 2 like to try to help and copies ds 1. Ds 3 is a baby so just giggles a lot

We have just started giving ds 1 pocket money but this isn't in conjunction with being paid for chores. He's happy to do his chores and will help off his on valition and I don't want that to change if he thinks we pay him to help. He's happy tp be part of the family/team and I don;t want to pay him to do that.

Ds1 is 9 (10 next month)
DS2 is 7, almost 8

They have to keep their room tidy. Although this isn't classed as a chore, more of their own responsibility.

They load the dishwasher. Feed the cats. Help with dinner once a week. Strip their own beds. Put their washing away (like bumpybecky I sort it into piles for each drawer for them).Sweep up the stones on the drive and sweep the patio.Help set the table before dinner. These are the 'expected' chores.

If they're off school and I'm tidying they also help dust, wash the inside of the windows, and hoover.

They don't get paid for their everyday chores. I've told them that this is their home too so they need to help keep it clean and tidy. If they do extras after school or in holidays I'll give them something to say thanks for helping.

DD1 (11) lays the table, clears the table, tidies her room and puts away the toddler toys before she goes to bed. She has £3.50 pocket money a week and a dance lesson £4 and youth club £1

Trying to train DD2 (2.9) to tidy up too but she's not great at it yet much to her older sister's chagrin

Mrs Jammi that sounds a bit rubbish! They are old enough to help out and if you have another one on the way i cant understand why they wouldn't WANT to?

My 3 DD are ostensibly lazy like all teens but they do help, they have to. When i was a single mum with them 3 years ago and attending full time uni they helped then too otherwise i would not have been able to cope. Now i am a sahm with my 11 month old DS they help out still bless them. Their rooms are entirely their own domain and they keep them clean and tidy. DD 3 who is nearly 13 does the bathrooms (and there are 4) twice a week at least, DD2 does nearly all of the washing, tumble drying, pegging out and putting away and DD 1 does the occasional bit of cooking, vaccums every other day and generally tidies up if i am busy.

We run a fairly largish house and have what i consider to be a big family, everybody helps and it works really well. My sister has three grown up children and they do sod all and i have always said to her it because she didn't give them any responsibility when they were younger - you don't have to slave drive them just get them to muck in! Its good for them and its good for you.

Mrsjammi i dont know how you run round after them with just one baby! DH here is a sweetie but hes a bit crap at cooking therefore im grateful when DD1 does it once or twice a week - am glad that your DH does pick up the slack for you though as your going to be even more knackered.

Its a bit extreme but i have been known to utilise this method when the girls have been particularly slacking. I just dont do anything, they have to take care of all their own stuff, i refuse to pick up after them, wash, cook, clean ... you know what i mean. It only takes a couple of days and they soon get the picture and start to pick up the pace again

I know everybody has different ways of doing things and i dont knock anyone who picks up after their kids as its part and parcel of having them but i cannot understand when they are grown how they cant be made to take a little responsiblity for themselves.

How about making a list or Rota? I know it might seem a bit babyish to them but you can perhaps explain that you physically just wont be able to do what you have been for them and that as they are part of a large family and therefore should behave as such and give their poor mum a hand!

Hats off to mrsjammi I don't know how you manage! Is your eldest showing signs of wanting to fligh the nest or is his life just too comfortable!

Btw i bet my house is more of a pit than your house but i've come to accept lower expectations when it comes to housework and am only really houseproud these days if we have visitors to stay!

DDs 5,6 and 7

Load and unload the dishwasher as needed
Keep bedroom and playroom tidy
Dusting the house once a week
Putting their clean folded clothes away
Help keeping DS amused (4mo)
Help assemble DS's napies once they are lean and dry

They all get £2.50 a week pocket money but this is not directly related to the chores, we have an arrangement which is, as part of this family you must help out, also as part of this family you will receive pocket money.

Oh and DD1 has just started making coffee for us

I am impressed with what some of you get your DC to do

Maybe the list or rota idea could work here. Unfortunately, the only jobs that DH does are all the simple ones, and if I get the DC doing them, he'll have even less to do

Rosie, how old were your DD's when they started cooking the dinner? Do you agree on what they will cook ahead so you can get all the ingredients, or do they just pull a pizza out of the freezer?

BigTillyMint i usually buy and menu plan for the week and if its something fairly basic like cottage pie or spag bol or something along those lines she can make it from scratch. I think she started to help out from about the age of 11/12 ish if i was back late from a lecture or something i just was to knackered to cook so she started to do it here and there - DD3 is coming on 13 and she LOVES cooking, she will peel all the spuds for the roast and really seems to enjoy the whole experience. Dont get me wrong im not reclining on a chaise longue stuffing my mouth with grapes lol i do alot of cooking myself and more complicated dishes as i enjoy it too i have just found that since DS has come along that i have so much less time, perhaps even less than when i was a full time student and single.

I turned on the waterworks a few times when i was pg and i felt they weren't pulling their weight, didn't work though but to be fair they are pretty good compared to what i hear them tell me about their friends (its usually in the form of a complaint that their friends do alot less though).

Mrsjammi i think that when you next littlie comes along they wont have any choice but to help out or fend for themselves you just wont be able to. Just prioritise for the time being and see if perhaps your DH would be prepared to take them to one side and have a word whilst you are in hospital. I know my girls made the house sparkly for me when i came home after my CS last Feb and it made me cry (hormones!)

16 years old with ds asd is always tyding up 18 year old ds keeps his bedroom immaculate and will hoover, load and unload dishwasher, clean kitchen table and living room table both glass wipe worktops clean windows do anything really if asked it may take him a long time to get round to it but he will do it eventually

DD is 10 and loves making cakes, which she is starting to do completely unaided (makes for interesting cakes at times!)

I must get DH cooking a meal at the weekend with the DC's - he needs their support as he is not a natural cook!

OJFO, one of the bonuses of having a child with ASD!

Have 4 DS 17,13,8 & 4. Don't give pocket money as such but pay a monthly amount into a savings account for each and pay for various clubs / activities that each does - so its quite a bit!! So they are expected to help out doing jobs as given, washing up, loading dishwasher, cleaning kitchen / worksurfaces, bit of hoovering and cleaning. DS1 also gets the pleasure of cleaning the cars in return for taking him to work / evening activities. DS2 has full responsibility for cleaning out rabbit & giuinea pig and is training up DS3 (just as DS1 passed onto DS2). Age gaps weren't really planned ahead but seems to help having a reasonable gap between so that they can help out more. DS1 is getting ready for Uni so spends more time studying than rest plus has a weekend job too.

They don't do all this automatically though and we don't have a strict rota - just get asked and if they moan about too much we list all the things we do for them and how much it costs us - think they appreciate that a house does take looking after and meals don't just appear. If they want to get into good books they end up doing a bit of baking!

DS1 15:.... um. Empties own bin. And...... puts own clothes away. That is all.

DD 14: .....Yep.

DS2 12: Mmmm-hmm......

Mine will do as little as possible.

I expect (but tbh it hardly happens) that the house is as near as dammit to when I left it to go to work.

What I find it a blazer on al living room floor, shoes in hall, milk and cereal on the work top etc etc. So I say 'What's goin on ? 'We live like dirty mingers now do we?' and I'm accused of stressing - which is a pretty accurate description to be faie. The answer is ' if you didn't leave it there in the first place you wouldn't have created a job. RANT Grrr

Any way the Question...sorry.

Mine are expected to muck in. EG on a blitz on the house day DS10 is expected to hoover living room dining room and bedrooms. Both DS13 and DS 10 are capable of sorting the washing piles out. They are expected to wash the bath after themselves and clean basin etc. As you can imagine I am one disapointed mum
However they do the traditonal 'male' chores without batting an eye lid, eg get the wood burner stoked, sort the gardening out, anything that needs fixing they will give it a go with their dad. I expect thjem to put dishes in dishwasher after ameal and to lya and unlay the table and so on.

ds, 11: lay table for meals & sort everyone out with drinks, then load dishwasher after meals; put his laundry away (disaster, all squashed into one drawer); occasionally hoovering; empty house recycling / compost bins into garden bin, etc. Seems like very little actually.