getting a baby to sleep during the day without using motion

[Vix02]

Hi,

My 5 week old baby boy is really great at sleeping at night time but I cannot get him to sleep during the day unless I take him out in his pram or in the car.
has anyone got any ideas or tips that I can try?

Thanks.

It's not totally surprising the OP has disappeared given she has a 5 week old baby and has just felt the full force of an MN mass hysteric, judgy shout down.

Whatever you think of 'crying it out' this is possibly the least helpful series of posts I've evr read on mumsnet.

IMO.

So what should we do Starlight? Live in caves and feed our babies by masticating the food and kissing it into their mouths? Wouldn't that freak out the anti-mouth kissers on the other thread...

beginning to wonder if this site is about support or simply people venting their opinions and judgements.

oh and for those people who like to sound oh so intellectual and above us all ....throwing their big words around...... over stimulation speaks for itself..... i have a good degree but this site is not about criticising people about their choice of words or abilty to use 'big' words ...... its about us all accepting whatever we are and being supportive as fellow parents.

OP - I'm going to ignore the CIO issue as I think you've been flamed and not enough info to comment. [I didn't do it until 12 weeks and then did v controlled hovering version that I was not wholly happy with but worked a treat and got her sleeping through so won't knock it although I think it has to be done carefully and for the right reasons].

Re the actual tips and advice you want - unfortunately I think at 5 weeks baby's needs (feeding to sleep, rocking to sleep, in buggy motion) etc are the most likely ways but you shouldn't panic too much about setting bad behaviour patterns (whatever the books say). Have you tried something constant and reassuring every time you put DC down? Like move to the cot room, sing a song, stroke face, tell DS it is sleepy time etc? I know that DS is only little but over time this type of reassuring pattern might help....

It only takes a short time at a child's later stage to break what you see as a bad habit and the early days are about survival. Baby will improve on the settling to sleep skill - concentrate on the other bits (feeding, cuddling) and it will all fall into place.

it sounded like you were taking the mickey...... but thats the danger of messaging and texting you cant see what emotion something has been said with. my dd was so easily stimulated .... if the wind blew a tree outside the window my dd would be as high as a kite...... hard work it was but she is delightful now and sleeps like a dream!!!! Unlike some of her friends who have to be laid with, stroked, have 4 stories read etc etc !!!

It really annoys me when people start going on about 'what do mammals do?'.
Whether you like it or not, we are where we are. We have houses, bedrooms, TV, shops, jobs that we can't take our kids to etc etc. Other mammals don't tend to have these things as a rule. So you are not comparing like with like. All we can do is work with what we've got and try to do our best for our child.
I agree that there is a tendancy towards conforming to routines, but our whole lives are routine these days, so it is not surprising.
And as for asking if a baby needs to be taught to sleep, and questionning how we 'know' a baby needs to sleep! I have never had any problem telling when my DCs need to sleep. I somehow manage to spot them rubbing their eyes, sucking their thumbs, 'looking' tired. Its not brain surgery. But sometimes they need a little help getting there. What's the problem with that?

Starlight- good post.
Undercova- totally understand as I also spot the signs but then OP is new to this game (assuming first child) as DS only 5 weeks so signs prob not that obvious or clear. Surely we all remember the early days when you have been up all night and are just desperate for them to nap if only just so you get a moment's downtime?!!!

VIx will he feed to sleep? Or take a dummy?

Hi Vix02,

"No cry nap solution" by Elizabeth Pantley has some good solutions on how to encourage babies to sleep during the day. She also believes that the techniques that you use in the early days do not necessarily lead to bad habits later on (supported by facebookaddict's post above). I'm hoping that's true as we are still having to rock our DS (15 weeks) to sleep during the day (and at 15lb he is getting quite heavy!). He self settles at night, but no matter how closely we watch him for the signs (rubbing the eyes, yawning etc) he still won't fall asleep without some crying and gentle persuasion during the day. Removing any stimuli (e.g. using blackout blinds or muslins to shade the pram) and swaddling (for little babies) also seems to help.

Good Luck!

"I wonder what other mamals do? Do their parents judge that they need to sleep but can't and therefore take them off for a walk? Nope."

What a crock, Starlight! I bet other mammals just leave their young to woof/moo/bleat/miaow/neigh/roar it out. Or swat them with a great big paw. Apart from hamsters, who would probably eat the whole litter, rather than deal with naptime squeaks.

Vix02- congratulations on the birth of your baby. Personally I think in these early days it's worth using anything that works to get the baby off to sleep, while you try and get a sense of any emerging routine. Once you identify a time when they usually seem to want/need to sleep you can work with that and it's my theory that all the rocking/motion/soothing/closeness can be good steps in a process towards the eventual goal of self-soothing. My 3 month old daughter is invariably ready for a nap at around 9 - 9.30am and she has gone from only sleeping in a sling at this time, to being happy to sleep in a constantly moving buggy, to being ok in a still buggy if initially rocked to get her off to sleep. I'm hoping that she'll eventually be developmentally ready for being put down awake in her cot- not holding my breath though! It's such early days for you and your little boy- I really would try not to worry too much about his daytime sleep patterns at this stage, unless he is getting upset. Would a sling be an option for you? I love the warm curled closeness of a tiny baby next to me and lots of babies seem to like it.