Reasons to be happy SAHM's!

[whensmydayoff]

Hi

I am a SAHM and have read a lot of threads lately about the boredum that often comes with the job!
I felt that since my PG hormones are blessing me with a GOOD DAY I should share my reasons to be happy and hopefully cheer you all up.

1. Unless you were a formula one racing driver or TV presenter, were there not days at work when you'd look at the clock and it was 2.30pm then 3 hours later you'd look again and it was 2.40pm !

2. If you tried going back to work, and I did - How horrible was it when your mum/childminder/nursery worker told you about what they had done today for the first time. How horrible was it when your child seemed to prefer them to you?

3. How fast has it went? It will get faster still and you'll look back and be glad you were the one bringing them up, seeing the progress, there for the hugs and funny bits. One day you will wish they were young again and wonder where it all went.

4. Do you have days where you are near tears or actually in tears by time DP/DH gets home? Little horror has upset you/made your day hell. Did nobody ever do that to you at work?

5. We will all be back at work, working with someone we have nothing in common with, clock watching or stressed out our tiny minds and think back to the days when we were pushing our babies/toddlers on the swings or having a relaxing coffee with other mums and wonder what we were moaning about.

Don't get me wrong, I too have found myself so bored that I think I may just stop breathing.
I have had evil thoughts towards Thomas and his friends.
I have stumbled across mums who are less interesting than paint drying and had to endure an hours conversation about sleep problems or weening when that all seems like light years ago to me.
It was just this morning, Im 28 weeks PG. I decided to look through my DS's baby clothes to see what I will keep and wash when it struck me - I can hardly remember him wearing most of them or him being so small. What the hell do you do with a baby anyway!
I came on here and seen more threads from bored SAHM's and just wanted to remind you all how quickly you will not remember these days.
If it didn't cheer you up a bit - It killed 10 minutes reading it! x

Op - i think it was a very fitting Op (for me)

I loved my job. Loved, loved, LOVED it. But the nature of my job meant that emotions generally ran high and tears were quite common. I do miss it, but i would not go back, that chapter in my life has ended and i am very happy in what i do now.

Being a SAHM to my DD has made me more patient, more laid back, more creative, more appreciative of the little things and generally a nicer person. I laugh every single day.

These are my own personal feelings about this and i refuse to be drawn into the WOHM/SAHM debate because quite honestly that debate has no interest for me whatsoever. Although i would like to add that whoever seemed to imply that SAHM's obviously were not able to have a decent career did make me laugh.

Good point Annie. Us woman do seem to feel we need to justify our status regardless of what it is.
Why is that?
On thinking about it too, it is woman themselves who seem to either judge or justify.
I've yet to see a man question me over my choice, they just except it.
I have two stay at home dads as friends too and nobody would ever dare question them like they do me. Men are so lucky!!
Point is, what ever we do, enjoy it, life's short.
I for one love being a SAHM and am very grateful I have this opportunity.
It should be ok for SAHM to pep talk each other or chat about the good bits and the bits where we feel low/lonely/stressed, is this not what MN is partly for?
I hope this carries on for that reason.

I've honestly never experienced the judging. Well, once. But not by another parent, which I think is pretty key.

And on MN of course...

Your lucky Fallen Madonna. I even get it from SiL's.
Do you never get - When are you going back to work?
I had it last week sitting with my 2 yr old and 6.5 months PG!! I laughed and said bit hard getting a new job looking like this.
I don't usually care. I think i've let Quattro ruffle my feathers which is very stupid!

Well, I have gone back to work, so no! I don't think that on it's own qualifies and judgy though, but of course you were there, so you know tone and things. I got asked if I was going back to work pretty often. Mostly just because people were interested. Or trying to make small talk.

Yes, alot of the time it's small talk. Not from Sil's who know fine well and honestly, some folk are quite about it.
Minority though.

whensmydayoff, there isn't any point in getting upset with quattro

"I'm not defensive about WOHMS at all - I was genuinely curious to see what was interesting about being a sahm"

quattro posted this earlier, when I read it I shook my head. But then I realised I had absolutely nothing in common with quattro, so there's no point trying to make your point with a poster who has views the polar opposite from yours.

I guess thats what is most interesting about this site, sometimes you see views expressed you didn't think would exist. It broadens your mind, in a way!

and TBH I haven't came across many WOHM's who have ever made me feel bad about my decision to SAH.

maybe because of all the things I hum and haw about in my life, being at home for my kids has never been one of them

I hope you feel a bit better now op, try not to let your SIL's comments bother you too much

Hi ssd. Im feel the same as you. It's one decision im glad ive made, I dread the day they grow up and try to treasure it now (most days)!
I so don't let my Sil's bother me. I know they are both jealous, ha!
I know, somehow I have became so defensive over this im sounding as if Im the one with the bee in my bonnet now!
I generally don't let folk bother me as I get the impression that the few that do act weird about it are probably jealous in some form, otherwise they'd be like most people and not care.
I have been shocked with responses like Quattro's and being called a nasty troll!
Your right though, there's no point, lots of different people out there so there's bound to be posts that annoy.
There is now plenty of positive stuff on here for SAHM's so job done.

I'm very interested in this thread. Went back to work 3 days per week in January but a change in circumstances means it's possible that I can give up work if I want to. I'm torn between wanting to make the most of DD while she's so little (21 months) and being able to have three days a week in the adult world and being able to have an uninterrupted wee whenever I want.

Am going to have a read through and see. It's so hard. I know where my heart is...

Hi bloodshoteyeballs.
It is a very hard decision. You'll have to be true to yourself. No point doing it if there's a chance you'd be really unhappy as that won't work for DD either.
I suppose the things to think through are...
Is there lots of things you can do to fill your week?
I go to library's free session of rhyme time once a week. Have met loads of mums with kids same age. I also take him to local council baths for swimming lesson once a week and again, met loads of local mums.
I put him in gym creche another morning for an hour and go swimming.
That only leaves two mornings free but I know that many mums now I meet them for coffee's, lunch at swing parks, soft plays etc.
If you lived somewhere remote or not very good with local things to do, that might be hard.
Do you know any other mums just now?
If you decide to do it, plan your week like you would at work so that you don't end up in the house and lonely.
On the positive side, it's great not having to rush anywhere. Choose what you do and when you do it.
I met my friend and her 2 yr old DS and new baby this morning. We pottered about the beach and swing parks so the boys could burn off steam then we all sat and had lunch (and cake). Walked home and now DS sleeping while I am slowly getting addicted to MN .
It's not a bad life !
It's lovely being there to see all the good bits and see them coming on.
They get a lot easier and even more fun from 21 months on.
Maybe other SAHM's can give their advice/experience to you.
It took me ages to decide and I was in tears when I left. I loved my job, collegues and had worked there 12 years. Never looked back! x