Does anyone else ever get the urge to just run screaming from their life as a SAHM?

[Olihan]

I'm just hoping what I'm feeling at the moment is normal and someone else can understand where I'm coming from.

I have 3 dcs of 5.6, 3.10 and 2.6. I'm a SAHM and have been since I stopped teaching when ds1 was born, so 5 and a half years.

I know in some ways I am very lucky that I don't have to work but the sheer drudgery and monotony of life is starting to send me a bit doolally.

The constant nagging to get them up and dressed in the morning, the horrific 5 minutes as we try to leave the house for the school walk, the constant mithering for food, the fighting, the permanent mess, the fact that I have no time or space to myself, the never ending washing/drying/ironing/putting away, cooking decent healthy meals from scratch that end up in the bin, spending hours trying to come up with meals that they might eat, the battle every night to get them into bed.

It's so bloody wearing.

I don't wish I hadn't had them, I love them more than life but at the moment I just want to suspend my life, go back to being single, childfree and remember who I used to be.

Tell me I'm not alone in this, please?

MeMeMe please can I come on the coach... I won't sing too loud and promise to share my sweets

Oooh, I like it Jeni. I'll go somewhere like that too.

Hope no one brings egg sarnies.

can I squeeze in at the back?

Glad to see that you are all sounding cheery even if is the thought of escape that has cheered us all up.

I'm in southish France, about 100km south of Lyon in the Drome department.

You better swing my way with the bus, I fancy a trip to Scotland (where I'm from) and definitely Singapore.

Cheers, chinks glass, and wobbles slightly (only joking BTW).

Thank you ladies out there for cheering a bored lonely bloke up down here! I'm in the middle of toilet training here and I seem to have hands full of poo all the time!

Toilet training:
"Mummy mummy I've had a poo" mummy lopes to potty- nothing there. "Where have you done a poo?" "In my bedroom!"

"Mummy I've done a poo!" Yes indeed there is one this time standing on its end in the potty. "It looks like a castle mummy"

"Mummy smell my finger"

Fabulous.

Best one was whilst fed up on the web last week "Daddy, D--- did a poo on the lawn!"

Ah well saves the hassle of getting cow manure...

My fav was with DD1. We were sat on te decking in blazing sunshine playing with basin of water and plastic tea set. DD1 in the nude. Chatting away, nothing untoward. DD1 gets up to get something and yes there it was! Squashed into the grooves in the deck. We both looked at it for a moment in some amazement. Where and when did that arrive from?
Twas fun scraping it out......not

oh oh talking of which....... I have a potty to empty.

lol!

Don't you just hate supermarket toilets. Went to buy stuff and on the way in the dreaded "daddy I need the toilet", after asking the staff where it was. Thank God German toilets are so clean you eat dinner off them, well not quite.

Then I arrive home and realise my fly was open the whole time! Ah well, the cage was open and the beast got his P45 ages back....

Are there any seats left?

I escaped back to work after the DCs went to school. I loved my job.

Unfortunately too much alcohol one night meant that I was caught, and returned to captivity to have DS2.

I love them all sooo much. I do do a little bit of work here and there but I pay out more in childcare than I earn and it's so stressful getting them all organised, plus I miss DS2 so much, it's hardly worth it.

Today I have an hour before school pick up to myself. But I can't go out - DS2 is asleep. There's no point tidying up as it gets messed up straight away. Ditto cleaning.

I feel like one of those zoo animals, weaving from side to side with boredom.

Oh to be a SAHM, I'd bloody love it
I hate going to work and hate putting DD in nursery.
I love my Wednesdays off with her and wish I could have so much more time with her but I can't. I was so happy yesterday watching her yabber on while eating her lunch or having her beside me out in the garden "helping" me do the weeding.
What the hell has to party loving feminist who hated children!?!
When I was pregnant some colleagues asked me would I be carrying on working when the baby arrived. I was like hell yeah and I'll be back at work when she's 6 months. What an idiot I was

Olihan, give it a couple of years and you will find it much easier I think. We have three but my oldest was 5 and 3 weeks when his baby brother was born and I think that bigger gap makes a huge difference.

Now they can entertain themselves, big two can bath themselves, take themselves to the loo, wipe own bottoms etc etc. I think the ages yours are is a very tiring time. You still have to do everything for them - dress the younger two presumably, take them to the loo, wash hands, wash hands 3 mintutes later when they have picked up a dog poo, clear up accidents ... it is exhausting, endless and fairly mind numbing.

Now mine are bigger and I have finally stopped breastfeeding, I have started to have more of a social life (and finallly have the energy for one), started to exercise again, and feel ready to start about jobs when DC3 goes to nursery.

'start about jobs' should read 'start thinking about jobs'

i'll cling to the roof of the coach if the seats are all taken. ta.

Thing is, Elanor, they're so much nicer when you see them in small doses. I worked 3 days when DD1 was little, and I cherished every minute I had with her. She was lovely and pleasant and didn't seem to whine nearly as much. We enjoyed our time together and were great friends.

Now we're together all the time, and it's all gone tits up. She whines all day, I yell all day and we don't enjoy each other much at all. The DDs seem to be constantly annoying and I'm a screaming banshee.

My relationship with both my girls would be much better if I could just bloody get away from them for a day or two each week.

So console yourself with the idea that part of what makes your relationship with your DD so special is that time you spend apart.

Annie - you are so right about that. When DD was little, I went back to work full time and missed her so much. The time I did spend with her was all joy and wonderment at her view of the world, and time spent in awe of her little achievements. I used to look across at my sister who was a SAHM , and think her life was perfect as she got to spend every waking moment in this state of euphoria.

Fast forward ten years or so, and now I'm the SAHM who "gets to" spend every second of every day with my DS - I'm ashamed to admit I had absolutely no idea it would be like this. As I said previously, I know I'm lucky, but the daily drudge can be wearing. I know we'd both benefit from a break from each other from time to time.

Oh yes - I feel like this most days and get really resentful of dh disappearing to work and don't get me started on him going away on business where he gets to sleep through the night, having the whole bed to himself, order nice food in restaurants or room service cos its on company expenses. His idea of giving me time off is looking after one so i can look after the other. He has never looked after both of them for more than 1 hour... rant rant rant
I don't care where I'd go just a hotel room somewhere with a big bath. i'd go to the cinema and shopping and sleep til 1pm...
Yes I know I'm lucky to be at home and there are lots of good points but a lot of the time I just don't feel cut out for this mothering malarky

Just out of interest, how many of you go out on date nights? We have a date night at least once a month (have to get dressed up, have to get a babysitter, everything else is flexible) and go out with friends once or twice a month. Doesn't have to be expensive and you can swap babysitting with another family in the same situation to save money. I know it saves my sanity, and possibly my marriage

I think it is the monotomy, I agree that cleaning under the dining table every day is my pet peeve.

I can't even sweep up with a brush because there is always something wet and gooey that needs a cloth

My youngest will start preschool in September and will do 5 mornings and you watch me sob my heart out about how much I will miss him

I think if I didn't have to do the housework part I would be very happy I hate ironing and sorting the clothes, but I do get a perverse pleasure from cleaning bathrooms and the kitchen

Potty training is awful and I think if someone told you the true horror of it when you were pregnant no-one would believe you.

My life is better than it was 3 years ago when I had a newborn and a preschooler and I didn't know which day of the week it was because I was so tired. Now it is more fun but I have a very lively 3 yr old boy who thinks it is his mission in life to climb everything he sees and jump off it giving me a heart attack in the process.

Ah, date night. I'd love to do something like that but DH is so fucking cheap he hates going out and 'wasting' money. Can you tell I'm a little bitter about it?

But I do go to the gym two mornings and one evening a week, and run on weekend mornings. Plus I go to choir most Sunday mornings. So I do get out of the house on my own quite a lot. I'd go insane otherwise!!!

I am most likely one of the few mums to be secretly looking forward to my DD4 to start school with her brother in September. After 6 years of the SAHM mum groundhog day thing having six hours a day childfree will be very exciting. I deserve it !!! I am looking forward to shopping on my own, cleaning on my own and maybe just maybe I might even go to the movies....I cant let my husband see this as he might think I should get a job. Hang in there ladies although we love them more than ourselves sometimes having a break does us all good.( My two kids are sitting next to me fighting while I write this )

I think we're starting in Taunton then wending our way up through England, then on to Scotland for a long weekend, then ferry across to France, across (? appalling lack of geography knowledge) to Bavaria then on to Singapore before finding a tropical island to stay for as long as we want.

That okay with everyone?

Flimflam, my dad's been in Sinagpore for the last 5 years and I have been nagging dh to get a job over there so I can have a maid .

I've actually been feeling a bit more positive about it all today. I think knowing that I'm not the only one who feels like this makes it easier to deal with.

(I'm still getting that coach, though, just for a while. )

Scrappydappydoo - I know what you mean about your DH's business trips. People (other mothers )keep saying to me 'oh, poor Mr BottySpottom, having to stay away from home 2 nights each week, he must be exhausted'. Er - he sleeps in a really nice expenses paid hotel, has zero interruptions, air conditioning, room service or food in any local restaurant of his choice and a swim before dinner'. Mmmmm.

Botty and Scrappy, DH worked away during the week for a lot of last year and still does odd nights away. He used to moan about how hard it was. Needless to say he got short shrift! I'd have given both my kidneys and probably a lung to have one night in a nice hotel doing exactly what I wanted. I still would.