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Original poster

are we crazy to go for 3 under 5? have you done it and enjoyed it..or not.

53 replies

Noonki · 22/05/2009 21:46

I have finally persuaded DH to have one more baby!!!

we have a 2 year old and a 3 year old and a 12 year old DSS.

Is it really really harder to have three little ones than two?

How do you do it if you have?, and if you had your time again would you spread them out more?

all views most welcome

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Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 21:56

oh no

will no one can break it gently to me that it is a crazy fool of an idea

OP posts:
Mulanmum1 · 22/05/2009 21:59

My mum had 3 DC under 5 and told me not to do the same (she also had my much older brother). She said you don't get to enjoy them. Many MNetters will disagree but I'm just passing on mum's words of wisdom

plimple · 22/05/2009 21:59

It could be crazy for some people, but if you're considering it it can't be too crazy for you. Of course 3 is more work than 2, but I think there are diminishing marginal costs in having children e.g. hardship of 1 compared to 0 is lots, 2 compared to 1 some, 3 compared to 2 tiny.

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whyme2 · 22/05/2009 22:01

erm, it is crazy, but we did it. Very hard work but not that much different to having 2 IMO. It is more fun as the baby gets older and you have your own little troop who entertain each other and you. I think if we'd spread them out then we might not have gone for the fourth. (ALthough DD1 was 5yr and 1 week when number 4 arrived)
Now that is crazy, mad, foolish and hard.

Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:01

thanks for the warning mulan! Pimple, are you speaking from experience?

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lockets · 22/05/2009 22:02

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whyme2 · 22/05/2009 22:02

I think you have a point about not enjoying them the same, I feel like I've lost touch a little with my eldest IYSWIM.

somanyboyssolittletime · 22/05/2009 22:04

The trouble is that the desire for having another baby never goes away (not in my case anyway!), so if you have them close together, you are ready for the next a lot sooner - iyswim! If you have a bit more of a gap then at least you get to look forward to having another for a bit longer. Have got 3 who were under 5 - hard work, lots of fun though, and nice to be able to do stuff that they all enjoy (contradicting myself now!)

plimple · 22/05/2009 22:04

Only the other end, I'm one of 9.

whyme2 · 22/05/2009 22:06

The desire to have a baby is there in me but the absolute certainty of no more is fixed because of having them so close together.

Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:06

somanyboys..sounds like the conversation I have in my head!

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Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:08

9

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somanyboyssolittletime · 22/05/2009 22:12

Sorry - not much help then! Glad someone else rambles in their head too!

plimple · 22/05/2009 22:12

Yup!! Lovely to have a big family, but I think we were a bit deprived of love and affection e.g. my Mum didn't want 3 kids sitting in her lap so none of us could sit in her lap. She didn't want 3 kids hanging off her cuddling so none of us got cuddles.
With 3 under 5 you need a big lap and Mr. Tickle arms!

sweetkitty · 22/05/2009 22:16

I have had 3 under 5 for 10 months now, DD1 was 5 days off 4, DD2 2 and a half when DD3 was born.

It is hard there is no denying it but great fun too, I would not change it for the world, I actually wanted them closer together but it didn't happen sadly. There are times when they all want you for something and they have to wait, DD3 probably gets left to cry longer than a PFB but she adores her sisters and they adore her, it feels nice having a proper little gang.

It cannot be that bad as I am comtemplating number 4 either that or I have completely lost it.

neenztwinz · 22/05/2009 22:16

Aw, Plimple, that's so sad!

I have 12mo twins and want another next year (when they are about 2.5) - can't wait! Then I'll probably have another after that too

Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:17

did you get some of the attention from bros and sis instead?

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Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:19

so it's not too crazy then... whyme so to hear that you and eldest are having a bit of a difficult time off it.

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lockets · 22/05/2009 22:21

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sweetkitty · 22/05/2009 22:22

That is sad plimple, I always make time for cuddles, you can have baby between your legs and one on each knees, family hugs are big in this house. Maybe your Mum wasn't a cuddly person even if she only had one DC (my Mum was not a cuddly person either).

plimple · 22/05/2009 22:29

It wasn't that bad, we had alone time when we helped with the washing etc, she isn't cuddly and wouldn't have been with just 1 anyway. She had a lot so we'd always have a friend and we did! Much more confident, able and independent than other kids our age.

Lou2222 · 22/05/2009 22:29

I had 3 under 3 which was a bit daft, now they are 2, 3 and 4 and a lot easier, the last year has been hard work though! (wink)

Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:29

lockets that is a lovely image

...at the mo the cat is practicing that very position.

I think that one on one is so important no matter how many you have.

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Original poster
Noonki · 22/05/2009 22:31

lou...that must have been so hard, where as now I imagine it's a doddle

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whyme2 · 22/05/2009 22:37

It isn't all bad, I just feel a bit sad because she has missed some of mummy and I can see the effects on her. I was in hospital alot with my third pregnancy so of course she missed me the most. I need to make up the time with her.
On a positive note they are all good together, play well and the baby gets lots of love and attention. I enjoy their fun and games, just wish there was more of me.