Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Want to co sleep, but how?

36 replies

roseability · 27/01/2009 21:59

Pregnant with number 2 and I am keen to co sleep. I never officially co slept with my DS (2.9) but he would quite often sleep in our bed on 'bad' nights.

Which is the best way to do it? In your bed next to you or maybe one of those bedside cots? If they sleep in your bed which is the safest way to do it?

Any advice/experience greatly appreciated!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 22:09

IMO I wouldn't co sleep with a baby in your bed BUT then I didn't do it...

I just hear bad stories and listen to the advice not to.

I guess if you wanted to then the safest way would be with a cot by your bed (I did this) and some have the side than lowers to bed height so the cot is like an extension of your bed iykiwm...

beansprout · 27/01/2009 22:15

What advice not to?!

I co-sleep with ds2 and it's just lovely. Would strongly recommend reading "3 in a bed".

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 22:18

get them in the bed, cuddle, enjoy.
don't smoke drink or take drugs
best if your brestfeeding too.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 22:23

Didn't mean to be harsh BUT there is so much around atm about sleeping with your lo in your bed. Esp newborn.

Yes I agree its lovely (dd and ds never ones for sleeping with us as babies but dd now over 3 loves getting into bed with us) BUT imo I wouldn't with a "baby"

funnypeculiar · 27/01/2009 22:24

As I understand it (I am happy to be contradicted) latest research suggests that co-sleeping with mother (who is not drinking/doing drugs) is actually the safest way to sleep (lowest rates of SIDS) - according to some recent work with ?Pakistani? mothers who have very low SIDS rates

We just had dd in the bed - duvet pushed down low, she slept on top of duvet, in gro-bag. She slept between us, but I think the best advice is for baby to sleep between mother and a safe side (mothers are more alert to baby changing position etc)

Watch out for baby being able to wriggle under anything (pillows etc) or fall into a hole (eg between bed & wall) as well as obviiously avoiding overheating by them getting under duvet.

funnypeculiar · 27/01/2009 22:25

And obviously the big no no is sleeping on a sofa (rather than a bed) - which does create much higher SIDS risks

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 22:34

shh, did you keep your babies in your room for 6 months?

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 22:35

see I would worry I would squash them and its the cot death issue that worries me..I thought risk was increased if you slept with them.

Both dh & I never sleep well when dd is in with us as even at 3.6yrs we worry we will squash her lol..!

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 22:35

shh, did you keep your babies in your room for 6 months?

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 22:39

Yes I did....in fact both were about 12 months+...

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 22:45

good

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 22:50

why .?

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 22:53

because you find most people who think it's dangerous to co sleep, think its ok to put babies in their own room alone.

thumbwitch · 27/01/2009 22:59

I wasn't going to co-sleep at all but it just happened. I found that if I slept with my arm outstretched above DS's head, it made rolling over impossible. He didn't move at all in the first few weeks except to nuzzle in for a feed so we got on fine. I had a blockade the other side of him so that he was hemmed into the bed, and DH chose to go and sleep elsewhere so he got his much-needed sleep "because he had to work, you know" - but that helped too cos more room in the bed.

I sleep with a sheet and blanket and duvet actind as an eiderdown - the duvet was kept right away from DS and he had his own blanket over him. He was nowhere near the pillows either.

I don't move much in my sleep, as I said, neither did DS so it worked well for us.

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 23:03

completly the wrong idea there!

In fact dh & I are VERY ott with it comes to dd and ds. Out of our friends we are the only ones who have shared our room with the dk's till beyond 1 (others had in own room at around 4-6 weeks ), we have never left the dk's over night with the gp's, only started sending dd to preschool out of need for interaction around 3 months ago...hated her being in someone elses care.

DD still has a monitor on in her room

Honestly people think we are mad!

We had x2 mc's before dd and I think that has made us the people we are today.

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 23:07

oh well i'm glad.
i think it's great having them in your room as long as poss.

it makes me so mad when people put newborns in their own rooms.
don't they know the risks?

sounds like your doing a grand job to me.

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 23:09

In fact I vaguely remember co sleeping with ds...he has been v ill since birth and the only way he would sleep was on me..dh would pad the floor out and block ds in iykiwm BUT I hated it..

and in fact I even slept with him in a chair in hospital...The nurses seemed to agree with it as it allowed ds to be calm and to mend after each operation.
BUT tbh they checked on him every 15 mins and he was wired up so I guess if anything happened they would be aware straight away.

They just saw it as bonding with ds and he was always calmer when sleeing into me which I guess babies are.

I loved it BUT hated it as I worried so much about him falling/being squashed etc.

Don't get me wrong, Im not against co sleeping BUT just feel it should be done in the correct way. And that mums are aware of the risks if done wrong iykiwm..

The times we did it was due to health issues and not because we planned it iykwim..

Don

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 23:13

well thats all we can hope for, parents making informed decsions.
is your baby well now after the ops?

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 23:13

yes I agree...our friends who have put their lo's into their own room laugh at us...

any slightest noise on either of the dk's monitors and we are in like a flash...unlike when dh was at our friends recently..their ds2 was ill and woke coughing,the dad said "oh dw will be home soon so she can check on him when she gets in,if he is sick she can deal with it" .

DH was totally shocked and shamed him into checking...

BodyBagBastard · 27/01/2009 23:14

shh, people like that make me

mumof2andabit · 27/01/2009 23:15

Co slept with both of ours for 6weeks (or there abouts, dd was longer I think) with lo in the middle on top of the duvet. I sleep through everything dh is much more aware so it suited us. After that they went into Moses basket by my side of the bed till about 6mo then cot in their own room. Love sharing a bed with baby as breastfeedinh for me would be a PITA if they weren't right there for the first few weeks.

Coldtits · 27/01/2009 23:15

I slept with ds2 in a moses basket ON the bed. I was scared of rolling on him but didn't want to put the basket on it's stand as ds1 was like a labrador on coke when he was 3, and would have knocked him over

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 23:17

He is still not 100%. He's had about 3 op's and numerous stays in hospital and guess this is how it will be for the next few years+ but at least he seems to be thriving.

He was born with hirschsprungs disease (missing nerve cells from the bowel, results in delayed/no bowel movements which are fatal). We just need to be very watchful with him as he can change so quickly.
The last 3 months have been hospital visits/stays galore but fingers crossed...

mumof2andabit · 27/01/2009 23:17

Lmao at labrador on coke!!!

Shhhh · 27/01/2009 23:18

lol at coldtits:

"ds1 was like a labrador on coke when he was 3"

Flip

1 2