Got friends 7 year old DS staying - he's still in night nappies

[dilemma456]

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Please don't have a go at op - she was asking a genuine question.
It's meant to be the safe option to ask us lot

But if it's common and not unusual the best way to change people's attitudes about it is to say so and explain it. I am genuinely surprised - I really thought almost all children would be dry at night by now. But I am perfectly willing to be corrected by mnetters who know better, absolutely. I would be a bit shocked and sad too, had someone dropped a 7yo at my door with the same instructions but just because it's out of the realm of my experience. Doesn't mean I'm RIGHT to be shocked but unless I were to ask somewhere like here I'd never find out how common or otherwise it was!

my DD's were all dry at night by age 2/3.

DS's.......DS1 was 6.5, DS2 has just gone back into them as we were going thro hell (and wet duvets at least twice a night), he is 6 next week!

DH was 10 before he was dry, as was his brother, so clearly a family thing.....I was also late, but then, my childhood was mixed up.

tis soooooooooooooooooo normal.....nothing to be shocked about TBH.

www you should listen to some of my programmes

And MOST 7yos are dry at night so if like the OP (and me) you'd never come across it before you might be surprised. Doesn't mean you'd be unsympathetic or unkind or anything towards thge child inq uestion, just that you thought it unexpected. Which is ALLOWED you know!

I got a bit shirty about theand

It made the op feel like more of a judgement than a genuine enquiry.

x posted ibundle, I admit to inexperience.

I think people don't say much in RL about it as they are concerned about people's comments back, especially in front of the said child. DD would have been horrified in her cassmates in general had known. She hated not having the control at night. She had been determined from the age of 2 - she self potty trained during the day at that time quickly, and didnt want nappies at night either. At 4y she refused to wear pulls ups at night so we go tbed mats, but still accidents lots. She would have been worried people would have thought she was a baby, or concerned about her friends.

AAnd TBH, the fact that people do say they'd feel sad and shocked only makes people feel more strongly that they need to keep quiet, to protect their children from such responses - however un intentioned they might be.

But if MOST 7yos ARE dry at night then a and a emoticon isn't a sign of extreme judgement and a reason to have a great big go at the OP, they're just, well, signs of surprise and sadness. And that's fair enough - because MOST 7yos are prob night trained and therefore it can#t be great to be a 7yo boy and not be.

I know www

dd1 was properly dry last yr, and talked to lots of parents about this, but otherwise I wouldn't have known either...

it's quite strongly inherited but lots of parents don't remember/weren't told about their nocturnal bladders so are shocked when it happens to them

there shouldn't be and though

imo

worse things happen, at sea

really

And I think almost ALL of us WOULDN'T BE UNKIND to a child who stayed who wasn't night trained, just that we might not have been expecting it, that's all.

We had some people to stay whose 8yo kept wetting the bed. I would have preferred pull-ups .

DS1 has been out of nappies day since 2.0 and night since 3.0 but he's nearly seven and wets the bed occasionally, maybe once a month or so. Prob depends how deeply they sleep as much as anything.

My brother wet the bed every night until he was about 10 or 11, I remember my Mum tried everything he even had this pad with an alarm attached so when he started to pee it rang and woke him up, except it didn't I used to get up and turn it off he slept through it.

A friend of mine used to stay over and she would have been at least 13 and wet my bed quite a few times, we said nothing about it, I think she wet her own bed too as it stank of wee

Have to admit that I responded as I did due to protectiveness on the part of my DD. I felt the sad/shocked came across as judgemental towards the boy - probably not intended that way I know - but when you have seen your own little girl so upset over the same scenario it is natural instinct I think.

BTW, will admit to regularly wettong the bed until I was 10 or something and finding it MORTIFYING. And listened to a (R4, v likely) prog a while ago which explained that there can be a hereditary link. I do remember finding it v awful and begging my mum not to tell teachers about it when I was about to go on a school trip in primary school. So hey, I am not devoid of understanding on thsi.

Dh regularly wet the bed until he was 17 (yes, really!). Dd1 was dry from about three, dd2 wasn't regularly dry until 6 and still has a mattress protector on her bed (aged 9.5) as it's not unknown. I'm not holding my breath for ds1 and ds2 to be dry before the age of 7!

Hey really, a lot of misunderstandings on here are about misinterpretation!

I really think none of us would be unkind to a 7yo who wasn't dry at night but many of us (before reading this stuff) would be surprised since the majority of children are dry at night before that. That's fair enough, surely? We all recognise that there are plenty of children who do things later or earlier than 'average'

I was 8 before I was dry and would fall asleep anywhere (still do)so wet the bed and the car and the sofa.... My friends use me as an example of a perfectly continent adult to reassure their bedwetting children that it will end. My mum is eldest of 8 kids so she knew I'd grow out of it in time and was very nice, but the time I weed all over the sofa of the newly rented campervan was a bit of a downer.
I was flabbergasted when ds2 did it at 2 yrs old with no suggestion about it on my part!

I remember being surprised to hear that a boy in dd's class was still in nappies at night when he started in Reception - would have been just four. Of course I got my comeuppance when ds1 was nearly 7 before he was out of them (and still has the odd accident tbh!)

my ds still wet the bed well in to his teens

he was out of nappies at night at ab out three tho

it wouldnt have occurred to me to keep him in them

dd2 however was dry night and day at 16 months

DS1 was 7.3 before he was reliably dry and we had been to the enuresis clinic. Of course I found out there how common it is. I was worried, I admit, that he would have to face embarrassment at sleepovers and things. He has wet the bed occasionally since then (a few times a year) but now, at nearly 10, he hasn't wet for over a year.

The OP probably didn't know because it's such a taboo amongst the kids

DS was not referred to the enuerisis clinic until aged 7 (they now go at age 6) and he dried up pretty quick once we had professional help.

We had a "star chart" for dry nights with small treats that ended with his first sleepover once he was pull-up free

He was amazed when he met a boy he new at the clinic as he was sooo embarrassed to have to go there. It made him realise he was not alone.

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no, not unusual at all. All supermarkets now stock the larger size night nappies for ages 8-15.