Three-year-old refusing socks and shoes due to sensory sensitivity

[Elaina87]

Reposting this here as I didn't get any replies on the neurodiversity thread: I have a 3 year who is neurotypical in terms of communication & socially, and hitting all usual milestones. However she is incredibly sensory sensitive. She struggles with loud noises and the feel of her clothes, but the main issue we are having is with her feet and this is becoming quite a problem now so I'm looking for any advice. She will not wear any socks, and it is now progressing to refusing shoes. The only thing she will currently wear on her feet are her crocs. she won't wear trainers, sandals or canvas shoes. I have tried all sorts of socks - soft ones, ones with no seam, fun character ones she has chosen herself. Nothing works, she gets very very distressed and if i do manage to get anything on her she just takes them straight off. This morning (hot day) she actually wanted to wear her new sandals and tried to put them on but once they were on she got upset ad took them off. I bundled her in the car with no shoes on and took the sandals with me to nursery in the hope she would put them on there but she outright refused and got very upset. She went in in bare feet🙃 and i had to go home to get her crocs. She's due to start a school pre school in September and has a uniform, so i don't think crocs will go down well there although I'm sure they will be flexible if i explain. I need to try and crack this though, it's been going on for about 7 months and just seems to be getting worse. She just seems to hate the feel of anything on her feet! Any suggestions or help I haven't tried?

Bamboo socks work for us, but they fall down with crocs on.

One thing you might want to start thinking abou tis the t-shirt + jumper issue. If she's got sensory issues, the multiple layers is often a problem and at school, this can be an issue. I agree with you though that primary schools are really good about this and quite flexible. I wasn't convinced that DS was goiong to be able to wear school uniform at all and discussed it with them during the early intake process in May and they were very flexible. As it turned out, his nursery did a great job of helping the kids adjust and we just accepted that he only ever wore his school tshirt. No fleece. No jumper. Light coat for to and from school - on a good day!

My ds who is NT absolutely hated socks - the heel sits wrong, or the seam along the toes is uncomfortable. Dd also NT was the same about tights (part of a school uniform)- I tried umpteen brands before finding a type she could tolerate.

Google seamless socks! This solved our problem.

You could look at various materials too... cotton, wool, silk, polyester..

I feel your pain @Elaina87 💐

We didn’t have issues with shoes but oh boy socks were something else. He couldn’t bear wrinkles in them and for a while it was common for putting on socks in the morning to cause a sensory meltdown that resulted in him ripping off every other item of clothing he had on. Needless to say, getting out the door was immensely stressful for everyone.

The sockshop bamboo socks have helped but I think he also seems to be growing out of the worst of it. He’s now 4.5 and it’s much better than it was. It was less than a year ago it was really bad so things can change reasonably quickly - although at the time I remember thinking we just can’t go on like this any longer.

He’s also got sensory issues with other clothing items:

• would wear shorts all the time if he could
• won’t wear layers except for a coat - so he won’t wear a vest under a top or jumpers over tops.

But nothing as bad as socks were!

Slightly worried about school uniform 😬

Like yours he appears NT in other ways so I’m not rushing to label him, just want to help him with the sensory issues.

Good luck and hang in there!