Are We Labeling Personality as Autism?

[almostalwayslaura]

is Autism being over diagnosed/suggested? Can’t someone just have different quirks and personality traits without it having to be part of some broad spectrum of diagnosis?

• my 11 year old daughter attended a child psychologist due to some dental related health anxiety and after a few awkward appointments he turned to us as parents and said ‘have you ever considered she might have autism?’ I’m genuinely curious regarding the Fine Line Between Personality and Diagnosis?

Yes.
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6998622/
edited to add that this isn’t about autism, but the general risks of the DSM changes that included extension of the definition of autism

Editorial, not research article, so the opinion of one person.

Contrast the peer-reviewed evidence from Lorna Wing and her colleagues that autism presents differently in girls and is massively underdiagnosed.

She will be autistic. Parents without autistic children aren’t having this constant battle and worrying whether or not their child is autistic.

I was thinking this the other day about ADHD. I’m diagnosed and wondered if it’s just my personality. Although it is causing more issues as I get older.

Getting worse as you age is normal, especially when menopause turns up.

No. If you look at the criteria for an autism diagnosis, and the assessment process to establish whether these criteria are being met, it's clear that no one is getting a diagnosis on the basis of just personality traits.

Please can I ask, what did a late diagnosis give you? Just some reassurance that you aren’t just different? How would this have helped you when you were younger?

It’s not suggested to everyone. It’s suggested when people are showing signs. If numerous people have suggested it, it’s likely there are signs. Family disagreeing with professionals is common; it doesn’t mean it’s over diagnosed.

Get your DD tested (if she isn’t already, as your other threads suggest)

she is not, the waiting list is long and I am trying to justify spending £1000+ for a diagnosis when I could just say she’s a little different. I’m trying to navigate what a diagnosis would do for her life rather than just put her in a box and keep her there forever.

I’d say based on all your threads, you’re terrified of an ASD diagnosis, even though you’ve well documented all the issues.

Totally agree. You are wanting to just say “oh she’s just quirky” rather than confront the possibility she may be autistic. So you’re on here asking if people think autism is overdiagnosed, anything really to avoid “labelling” your daughter.

Say you get her assessed and she is diagnosed autistic. You realise that nothing changes. She is still the exact same child you had the day before, it’s not a death sentence. It’s about understanding why she has the difficulties she does, and giving her the right support. being able to advocate correctly for her when she needs it, and help her understand why she feels differently to others.

nobody sits about hand-wringing about being put into a box because they’re diabetic, or have arthritis or epilepsy. It just shows how far we have to go to achieve full autism acceptance doesn’t it.

Since you’re not that bothered why not just stay on the waiting list? No one will put her in a box and no one will keep her there. She doesn’t even have to disclose it if she doesn’t want /need to.

What are you so afraid of?

@almostalwayslaura so, you don’t want to spend money on something that might be incredibly life changing for your daughter. You go girl.

And yes, a diagnosis can be life changing. Your are not labelling her, you are not putting her in a box. You are giving her the opportunity to understand herself, maybe not now, but when she’s older. You’ll be giving the school the opportunity to support her in a way that makes a difference. And you will be giving her an extra level of protection in employment and living life when she’s an adult.

And hopefully it will make you take your head out of your arse and help your daughter.

If we are diagnosing personality with asd, its only personalities that have persisten deficits in social communication and restricted repetitive behaviours that cause clinically significant impairment.

All the other personalities must get a different diagnosis.

This

I would much prefer the label autistic to truely horrible.

I think you're in a difficult place emotionally, so I'm trying to cut you some slack on the borderline offenceive attitude towards a disability. I'm an autistic adult, but wasn't diagnosed until after my autistic children were, which make me very aware of their needs, how they are suported, and the impact of this in contrast to how been unsupported effected me.

This I'd just a few examples of what diagnosis has given us:

Understanding of ourselves, not just in terms of 'why I find things more difficult' but the next step or 'this is what I need to do to manage that'. Eg. We can pace our plans to avoid anyone being overwhelmed.

Helpful in working out where disregulation is coming from. Eg. There are some senses DC seeks to regulate and others they are overwhelmed by, by knowing this I worked out that when they start putting things in their mouth, it's not about the tast, it's about drowning out sound, so ear defenders or moving somewhere quieter are more effective then conversations about germs/choking hazards. I would never of made that leap if i was thinking about the chewing as a querk without the context of autism.

Community, we are able to access a sen or autistic groups, so DC grow up with friends who are like them, instead of feeling like an outsider

School suport, I was overwhelmed and learned very little in primary school, still couldn't read or write when I moved up to secondary school. I did eventually catch up, but could probably have gone much further if I hadn't missed out on half my schooling through sensory overload. In contrast, DC have EHCP's, they get to go on movement breaks or work in quieter areas and are thriving.

Better mental health, a child with SEN is going to be corrected 100's more times then their peers. They're going to notice, and if they don't have a reason or have been told 'their personality' is to alway get things wrong, that's going to destroy their self esteem.

A late diagnosis gave me:

• A radical attitude readjustment on the part of my employer. For someone who has been fired in the past for failing to understand social norms and "shutting down" during sensory overloads, this is a life-changing improvement.
• A search term to use when looking online for things I could do to make my own life easier.
• Statutory disability protection under Equality Act 2010.
• Unlocked Access To Work government-funded workplace support, including coaching and assistive software.
• A means of giving myself permission to do things that otherwise would be forbidden as transgressing social norms, such as wearing sunglasses and tinted glasses indoors.

An earlier diagnosis would have got me all the above sooner and also:

• SEND support and reasonable adjustments at school.
• Disabled student support at university.
• A recognition from parents and other caregivers that I am vulnerable to abuse, instead of being blamed for being bullied and sexually assaulted.

rather than just put her in a box and keep her there forever.

A diagnosis isn't a limiting box, but an enabling key to unlock so much stuff that helps.

Your other recent thread describes a girl who masks heavily at school and is very disregulated at home.

"I truly I am struggling with her behaviour at home, she’s fine at clubs and school but at home I am fat, an idiot, ugly, stupid etc. She hits me, screams, throws strops like a toddler and gives me this evil look where I just think ‘how is this my daughter?’"

This is classic "autistic girl" presentation. She is showing signs of autism and the medical professionals involved in her care are recommending a referral to the diagnostic service because they recognise this presentation.

Keep her on the waiting list and, while she waits, look into how to parent autistic girls because you can start applying those measures now.

I think OP that you are understandably anxious about the possibility of diagnosis. I do think you should probably spend the £1000 if can afford it as medical professionals have already indicated you should consider autism as a possibility.

A close family member's DC was flagged up by the school they were at. The parents felt that much of what the school said in the pre assessment questionnaire was exaggerated and in 2 instances an outright lie. Child was about 6 at the time. After the assessment the doc/consultant basically said and put in writing that school were very wrong. Parents changed child's school, never any more problems. Child is quirky, but in a very bright way. Four top grade A levels, high achiever. Socially, no difficulty.

OP, I think the difference is that you and medical professionals have concerns

I never ever would have worked out that stuff in the mouth might be about regulating sound. Thank you so much - this is a whole new avenue to explore with my autistic kids.

The line between personality and diagnosis is impairment. It’s not that difficult. Lots of people have quirks but unless they cause a significant level of impairment it’s just personality.

I think a certain number of boxes have to be ticked for a diagnosis. Colleague of mine is very quirky and sought diagnosis. They said he had 'autistic traits' but didn't meet the criteria. I was a bit surprised. He's a difficult character, however his physical impairments probably have impact on that as he's hearing and visually impaired.

I think you’ve made a lot of assumptions there. Wanting to think carefully about a diagnosis isn’t the same as refusing to help a child — it’s about weighing up what’s actually best for them, both now and long term.

A diagnosis can be helpful for some families, but it’s not a magic solution, and it doesn’t automatically guarantee better support or outcomes. Schools should already be supporting children based on their needs, regardless of a label. A label that does come with certain stigma whether you like that or not.

Also, the tone of your comment is unnecessarily hostile. This is a complicated and personal decision, and it deserves a bit more understanding rather than insults.

What does your daughter think about all this?