Let’s shout out from the rooftop how bloody AMAZING it is to have sons!! Who cares that we don’t have a daughter? Not me!!!

[LondonLady1980]

Come on everyone!

It’s time we counteracted all these horrible and depressing threads lately about how disappointed women are that they are having “another boy”.

We’ve all seen them and the usual stereotypical worries that women have…. How abandoned they’ll be, how they’ll never see their son once they’ve grown up, how they’ll never see their grandchildren, how they’ll never have that assumed mother and daughter loving bond etc etc.

And don’t forget the sheer disappointment about never being allowed to dress their baby in a pink dress and put a bow in its hair…..

So let’s celebrate our wonderful boys!!!

I have two, they are 8 and 12 and they are the most wonderful and loving sons I could wish for. I absolutely adore them and I genuinely couldn’t give a crap that I never had a daughter!!

I love them endlessly and they were never ever viewed as a potential disappointment and they never will be ❤️

My Sil had 2 boys and then a girl
She always made it clear she wanted a girl
The difference in the way they are with their DD ,is unbelievable
She is truly the golden child
Sad for her boys ,but in a way also for her girl
She has brought up with such a fuss that she is having difficulty making friends as it’s all about her

How is me saying I don’t care that I’ve never had a daughter the same as a woman saying she is disappointed she’s having a son?

I’m saying I don’t care that I didn’t have something, and the other is saying she actively doesn’t want something

”I don’t care that I didn’t have a daughter” is the not the same as “I don’t want a daughter”.

Having a daughter would have been lovely, but I don’t care that it wasn’t the case because ultimately it doesn’t matter.

Ring thankful for my sons and not caring that I had boys and not girls does not mean I’m slagging off girls or daughters.

Oh that’s really sad, and it must be so hard to watch for all the family members/family friends who see it happening.

I was treated as the “Golden child” in my family and it was absolutely awful so I completely understand that it’s no doubt difficult for your SIL’s daughter too and will no doubt get even worse for her as she gets older too. The whole scenario is incredibly sad for everyone involved. ☹️

Are the brothers close? I always hope that in situations like this, the unflavoured children at least have a close bond in each other?

As I said further up, I have 4 girls and the only comments I ever heard were about how disappointed my husband must be to have girls instead of boys - as if boys would have been the golden choice. Like literally every comment, from number 2 onwards.

So I suppose it very much depends which children you have, as to the experiences you have with other peoples thoughts.

perhaps men express it differently so there’s probably a lot less crying and emotional posts on chat forums about it but i definitely don’t think it’s linked only to boys.

You don’t know the little boys I know!

I work in a nursery, but also have two adult sons of my own, and a grandson; I do not recognise these boys you speak of!!

Weird.

I have 5 sons aged 35, 32, 29, 27 and 25. They are my favourite people on the planet ❤️ having a houseful of boys was fun, chaotic, messy, endless feeding of them and all their mates, lots of laughs and very little trouble. Now they've all left home, they often pop round and the first thing they do is look in the fridge 😂

Girls are wonderful too and I'm sure I'd have been just as happy if I'd had girls (although I'm one of three girls and we were horrible teenagers!)

Eh?
Such a weird post!

Small children of all types are experts at talking "at" you ... I guess you might be less interested in typical boy topics but I'm not convinced girls are naturally better at conversation.

I genuinely never had a preference (we didn’t even feel the need to find out until birth, which is apparently rare these days). We have an almost two year old boy and he’s the best. I couldn’t imagine having a girl and if we were to have another, which we won’t, I would this time have a preference for another boy. My Godsons are also brilliant lads, now pre-teens. IME of the children of close friends the boys seem to bring much less social drama as they grow up than the girls.

You think boys can’t have conversations as well as girls?! It’s quite clear you’ve placed yourself around women as you say, because you have really no idea about boys. Interesting you say you find little boys ‘entitled’. They’ve learned that from somewhere. It must be the company you keep.

Probably for the best, you don’t sound like a very good parent.

I have 3 girls not once have I ever thought I wish one had been a boy. During my first pregnancy a close friend birthed a child with severe life changing abnormalities, I was just grateful all 3 were safe and healthy. Now my girls are mid to late teens and in the day and age we’re in with gangs and crime I actually think it’s perhaps more difficult to have boys these days. But I’m sure everyone’s children are amazing whatever sex.

Well I have one of each but will still join in as I absolutely adore my ds

I think the vast majority of people are just grateful to have happy, adjusted children, whatever their gender.

Im ashamed to admit I was a bit disappointed about having a boy (i already had a DD) when DS was born and i just didnt have the immediate rush of overwhelming emotion that I had first time round. But within weeks I loved him every bit as much as DD, and felt appalled at my disappointment.

@Cornflakes44 DS, 16, talked to me lots about his special interest (F1) after a while I started reading about it and listening to podcasts so I could understand some of what he was talking about and could have a conversation about it. Now im interested too, and enjoy it, sometimes we get up at 4am to watch a race together. (My own dad used to read my smash hits magazines, back in the day, so he could talk to me about what my favourite bands were up to)

DS is way more affectionate than DD, hes funny, good company, and he asks for way less money than his sister but probably costs more to feed! 🤣

You’re fucking weird. I say this as a parent of both.

Although as someone who had a boy first, the disparity in boys clothing ranges is pretty disgusting though.

Thankyou I think they are great but I'm biased. Ds1 is 19 and ds5 is 11. They all look fairly similar, although they have their differences too.

Ds2 has my looks and character I think. Ds1 has gorgeous long black curls and blue eyes, the others have lighter hair.

They all love their music and ds5 can sing beautifully. Ds1 is a professional musician. Ds2 loves music and is really good at it but hates playing in front of people. Ds3 loves drama but he also likes playing the piano. Ds4 likes science and diy. Ds5 loves to read and he likes singing as well. It's usually very loud in our house and food vanishes in no time like we have a plague of locusts. We get through so much laundry I get excited this time of year when I can dry it on the line.

I grew up with sisters so ds1 was a bit of a shock and I wasn't sure if I would know what to do. But I soon learned that there wasn't much difference at the beginning, that most of the differences were stereotypical nonsense. That if you want to do French plaits and bows just get a barbie doll. That dresses are impractical anyway. That if you want to put a pink top or leggings on your baby boy then do it, but mud stains are hard to get out of pale pink and jogging bottoms last longer than leggings. I adore having boys and in my experience they stay children for longer. My much younger nieces are all about nails, jewellery and phones but my 15 year old still loves playing on swings and our trampoline. When his mates come round they play in the garden for ages.

The difference in the smell from their respective bedrooms will startle you after puberty, just to warn you… your lovely boys WILL inhabit a filthy wankhole, no matter how you try x

My son is 19 and he's brilliant - kind, funny, clever, has shown incredible courage through bereavement and health issues, and I honestly couldn't love him more. He was an absolute joy as a little boy - cuddly, cheeky, and huge fun to play with - and he's becoming an amazing young man. His friends are all great too and they really have each other's backs. We sadly lost his younger sibling in early pregnancy but I would have loved another boy.

Thankful for having both sexes
And ido think that helps with the comparison thing, you compare them less, which us better fir everyone

I was more worried when pregnant with a dd tho, after a lifetime of bring told how horrible girls are.......

Thankfully soon as my dd was born I knew that was bs from my mum

Why are daughter-in-laws stereotyped to hate their in-laws (especially the MIL) but son-in-laws aren’t?

I think it's the fact that women still do most of the emotional/mental labour in running a household - so they often arrange family visits, do more childcare, facilitate families etc - are in charge of the family, whereas men are seen as side characters. So if a MIL tries to run the family and steamrollers over the DIL's wishes, they end up in a feud. I don't necessarily agree with all that, but that's the stereotype. And tbh women STILL do way more in the home than men (unfortunately) so it is at least partly true.

When there’s a gender disappointment thread and there’s plenty of them, it’s ALWAYS about not wanting a boy. People pile on and validate the OP with their own tales of disappointment or how they’re sooo grateful they had a girl. Pisses me right off

I have a daughter and 2 sons all very different personalities and I adore all of them. My 2 boys are polar opposite but have a genuine love for each other. One son very independent whereas other son still needs his mum for counselling and chats . Absolutely adore every bone in their bodies. .I couldn’t imagine life without both of them 💙

5 here too and very few believe me when I say I have never ever been disappointed each time they were born, we plan on having 1 more as we always said six - well Dh more so than me.
If my final baby was a girl, I would be just as thrilled with my baby as I had been with her brothers and it would be lovely to experience the different clothes/hobbies etc. associated with girls- I would however feel a little sorry for her as having 5 older brothers may well hinder her chances in the boyfriend dept😂