Weaning, milk feed, naps…help!

[Gerbera55]

My LB has just turned 6 months old so we’ve started weaning. Nothing much is going in at the minute but that’s okay - I know he’ll get there with that!

He’s a big boy (just below 99th centile for weight and height) and has the appetite to match. He’s formula fed and has always drunk a lot of milk. He slept through the night from around 7-14 weeks but since then, he’s woken for 2/3 feeds a night, it’s like we can’t get enough milk in him during the day.

We’d got him to the point of being able to be rocked to sleep for his naps in the day but that all went out the window at about 4.5 months when his first teeth cut through and his CMPA symptoms kicked in and since then, if there’s no milk going in, he isn’t sleeping! He might settle with a cuddle if he wakes in the night but you can guarantee he’ll wake again an hour later for milk.

I just can’t see how I’m ever going to drop bottles when he won’t sleep without one! I’ve tried everything to get him to sleep without one and even though he’s clearly exhausted, he’ll just cry horribly until I make him a bottle.

He's 6 months old. Mine still has milk before bed at 3.5. he obviously still needs it especially as he's not getting much food in. Milk is their main nutrition source until 1. So if needs a bottle before bed please give him one.

I have no intentions of stopping a bottle before bed! My main concern is nap times, they don’t align with feed times.

Don't overthink it, his nap timings will change and it will all settle down. The worst thing you can do right now is worry to much because it ruins a lovely time. For the moment, try and give him a meal 30 mins or so before his bottle - loads of babies are fed to sleep because it's the quickest way - they end up sleeping through the night and eating well!

What about making just a small bottle for nap time? Would that work or would he be annoyed he didn't get a bigger bottle?

why not change the feed times to match nap times? I thought bottle feeding was best to be responsive anyway, not timed.

how many feeds a day? And how much per feed?

I don’t think I dropped bottles til around 8 months. I think you need to give it time! A lot changes in those few months after starting weaning

Sounds like the milk is more of a comfort/sleep aid than hunger?

I would separate feeding and sleeping.
You won't be dropping bottles for a few weeks when he is eating more solids but you can stop using them as a sleep prop.

Not enough info here. How many bottles a day (before bedtime) and how much in each one? How long are the naps and how many?

I offer 7/8oz and he takes what he needs.

We’ve always fed responsively but as he’s gotten older his feeds have naturally become spaced apart quite evenly.

Okay to answer Qs about feeds and naps. He has feeds spaced 3-4.5 hours apart (this is entirely led by what he wants). We offer 7/8 oz a time and he takes what he wants from
that, sometimes he’ll have 5/6, others the full 8. He doesn’t have a set nap routine, so these timings are rough estimates. He wakes 7-7:30 and doesn’t want a bottle straight away, he never really has. He’ll then have a 30 min nap at around 8:30-9, (ideally) another 30 minute nap around 12/1 but he doesn’t always do this depending on classes we’re at and then he naps from about 3pm until 5-5:30.

If I were you then I'd just keep giving him the bottle before his nap no matter if he has not long had food. It will eventually get to the point where it evens out, it's always awkward at the beginning of weaning. He's only 6 months so really his main nutrition is still milk. If he's recently eaten and then needs a nap then instead of the 7/8oz try giving 4 maybe

My suggestions would be:
move feeding away from sleeping - you will need to brush his teeth at night after milk soon anyway.
So offer a milk feed on waking, but get him to sleep by cuddling and putting him down and patting him in the cot.
At bedtime do bottle-stories-teethbrush-bed

Routine wise I'd aim for the last nap to be a short cat nap
So wake, milk & breakfast, morning nap, bottle mid morning, lunch, nap (aim for this to be longest - I'd take him for a walk in the pram to get longer than 30 minutes if necessary, bottle mid afternoon, cat nap 4.30-5, tea, bedtime routine.

At night I'd try to do a dreamfeed bottle around 10-11pm, and then another feed around 3am if he wakes.
Any wake ups inbetween just offer water.
The 3am feed is the first one to drop.

I’ve tried everything to get him to sleep without the bottle - he will just scream for hours. Any tips?

I also try to extend his earlier naps - his max is 40 mins and that’s even out in the pram.

At that age my little one wouldn't take water in the middle of the night and still won't. I think mine used to wake up about 3 times in the night and he had a bottle each time. 6 months is when they have a growth spurt so for a few days he will probably shock you with how much he wants to drink😅. And as you say he's at the top of the centile charts then it's not really worrying that he needs so much milk imo. As I say, mine had 3 bottles in the night with each wake up until he was 15 months old and had one bottle before bed and finally started sleeping through. I wouldn't even think about dropping bottles yet, he's only just starting to wean and as you say, not much is going in. You'll know when to drop a bottle when he wants to. I know people on here are weird about feeding to sleep but mine was always fed to sleep and now sleeps through perfectly with no issues. Don't make your life harder by denying him a bottle in the night when it's obviously what he wants/needs. It just causes stress for both of you

My little one never dropped the night bottle until sleeping through. The daytime ones went first. It's totally dependent on what your baby is like and it seems like op's is like mine was. Mine also has CMPA so I never tried to minimise milk intake at night because of worrying over whether he'd had enough nutrients from his food in the day

Just leave it - solve the 'problem' when it actually becomes a problem - there is no best way to get a baby to sleep, and some need more support than others. Don't let him scream for hours - that sounds like much more of a problem than a bottle before bed!
Extend his naps by extending his wake windows, but really, unless his nighttime sleep is an actual problem, don't try and over optimize every little thing in his schedule.

Try pick up/put down - cuddle or rock until sleepy then put in his cot and pat and shush in the cot.
If he gets very upset pick him up and cuddle/rock again until calm and then put down and pat.
Repeat and required - first day may take a long time but be consistent and it should only take a few days.

How many bottles during daytime, on average? That's the key bit of info here. It sounds like if he's having 4.5 hour gaps between them, and as you've said just started weaning so probably not getting much food, then he isn't getting enough milk intake during daytime hours. It's also no wonder he isn't taking a morning bottle if he's feeding 2-3 times overnight!

I would employ a strategy of gradual change. Start offering him the morning bottle. If he refuses most of it, that's fine, but it's the first step. Reduce feed times to 3 hours. 4.5 is a long stretch and our DS was only really on that sort of a stretch once solids were well established.

And lastly, keep going with the solids. Your baby is probably much hungrier for them than you think.

Today for example - 8:30, 11:45, 2:15. He normally has a smaller bottle at around 5:30/6 then bedtime at 8-8:30.
4.5 (when that does happen) hours is his longest stretch but I offer beforehand, he just doesn’t take it.

He’s offered solids 2x a day - he’s squishing it and playing but not yet ingesting much.

I agree. If he’s going up to 4.5 hours between feeds then he’s only having 3 bottles in a 12 hour period ? Thats whats id expect once theryre having 3 good meals a day. I would aim for every 3 hours.

at this age I would do

7am bottle
8am solids
10am bottle
1pm bottle
4pm bottle
7pm bottle

plus possible dream feed at 10/11 if he’s not sleeping long at night

its all a bit trial and error but my guess is he’s not getting enough in the day

Jesus I didn’t think I was going to get told I was starving my child! I definitely do think he’s getting enough milk in the day! 4.5 hours is an extreme example, when he’s not taken it at 3/3.5 hours when offered! By the time he goes to sleep he’s had 40+oz every day which I know in some people’s eyes would be too much. Then he has a dream feed at around 11pm, plus he will wake for 1 or 2 more feeds.

You're not starving your baby at all. 40oz is a lot. I think go for a 6 month old the max is 32oz in a 24 hour period so don't think you're letting him starve, you're absolutely not. I know everyone disagrees with me but honestly if he likes a bottle before sleeping then there's no reason to withold one. When he's more established with his eating solids he'll drop his bottles himself, you'll know when he's ready to. Just keep doing what you're doing and let him have his bottles in the night. You'll both be happier for it😊

Only going on the info you said. You didn’t say 4.5 was an extreme example to start with. If it happens rarely then I’m not sure why you said it 🤷‍♀️ unfortunately I’m not a mind reader…
somw people still feed their kids in the night at 1-2 plus… maybe a comfort thing? Maybe genuinely hungry. Maybe the room temp isn’t quite right? Maybe teething? But doing night feeds at 6 months is common.
you might just need to see how he takes with weaning. When he starts eating more food things might change.

I did say between 3-4.5 hours apart based on what baby wants. Thanks. ☺️