How to wean baby off breastfeeding to sleep?

[Newparent101]

Sorry for the long thread, trying to give some background context.

My baby is 4 months old. She sleeps great through the night but unfortunately I've made the error of breastfeeding her to sleep each night (at the end of bedtime routine). Now realised that my partner should try to get her off to sleep some nights without me, or else I'm worried that I'll have to be around every single night to get her to sleep! So we made a plan to alternate nights - for him to get her to sleep one night, I do the next night, etc.

Tonight was the first time we tried my partner putting her to bed - he did the usual routine which went fine at first - nappy change, sleeping bag, read a story, give a bottle (all with dim lights and lullabies playing). But then when it was the time I'd usually breastfeed her to sleep he gave baby the dummy instead, she started crying, after 10 mins screaming hysterically so I took over and started the routine all over again, finally ending in baby going to sleep by breastfeeding - took 2 more hours before she was calm enough to fall asleep.

Does anyone have any ideas about how to wean out of this pattern? Should I continue to get baby to bed every night myself (no involvement from partner) with the goal of weaning her off of breastfeeding (instead giving her a dummy) - and only when she's consistently sleeping without the boob when I put her to sleep, ask my partner to try getting her to sleep in alternate nights (I'm guessing in days/weeks)? Or persist through with my partner doing alternate evenings trying to get her to sleep? Or something else? Realise now is sleep regression time to would it be better to wait until she's older?

Thanks in advance!

I did literally every bedtime when I fed to sleep - but now toddlerhood and weaning is here my evenings are mine again - DS always wants daddy bath and bedtime instead - your time will come lol

You’re not doing anything wrong, @Newparent101 at at four months it’s still early days! That said, if it’s not working for you to breastfeed your baby to sleep (because you need greater involvement from your partner), that’s reason enough to make a change.

I would see if baby would take a bottle of expressed milk from Dad for now. Pop the heating on now the weather’s turned and get Dad doing it shirtless for skin to skin, or maybe even holding something that smells like you at first. Then eventually, I would work towards moving the feed from before bed to before bath and book for example, so you can try to break the association between feeding and sleep.

Once baby is six months and weaning onto solids begins, the dependence on you for calories will gradually decrease and you’ll hopefully find it all easier!