Feel like an awful mum

[Annon7890]

I feel like such an awful mum, I’m so horrible, I’m a single parent with 2 children age 9 and 11 and I’ve come away with the kids for a week in a caravan it’s the first day and they have been a nightmare all
day, not listening, arguing with each other, being silly and absolutely horrendous at bedtime only going to sleep at 12 o’clock, I have really shouted at them to the point where I got really frustrated and upset and cried and told them they have both made me really sad and I feel like going home because of their behaviour, I told them how tired I was after a long day and they aren’t listening and have gone too far and they are ruining the holiday, they are both asleep now but I feel like the worst mum in the world and everyone on the caravan site probably thinks it too because they will have probably heard me shouting for the last 45 minutes at the kids to go to sleep, I have apologised to them both but I just feel so horrendous now, I feel like I have spoilt the whole holiday that they were really looking forward too

That’s the best response. New day, new beginning.

Enjoy the rest of your holiday.

You sound like a great mum to be giving them a holiday, and they now know the expectation.

Children need to learn that their behaviour has consequences.
They have learned that behaving badly, especially after a busy day getting to a holiday, can make you sad and angry and is something they should not do.
This morning sit them down and spell this out to them. Tell them very clearly and calmly that if they repeat this behaviour there will be no holiday ... that you will go home.
Talk to them about the cost and effort thst have gone onto it ... they are old enough to grasp that.
Then talk about the things that they might like to do over the coming week. Make sure they know these things are contingent in them behaving well.
Do not beat yourself up. Getting off on holiday can be stressful and hats off to you for managing it on your own.
As parents we all try to be calm and rational. But there is no harm in your children learning that actions have consequences.

Just seen this morning's bulletin! Well done!

Good on you! Hope you have a lovely day.

Separately, you're not doing yourself or your kids any favours if you start sending the message that your needs don't matter at all as you get towards the teenage years. Of course the kids are your priority but your needs matter too and they need to respect that.

She's perfectly entitled to pull them up on bad behaviour

Agree with this. They are not very little children and do need to be pulled up on the fact that they were arguing a lot and not listening to you. You said you didn't like their behaviour, not that you didn't like them. Having said that, you're all on holiday, I wouldn't worry too much about their normal routine and getting to bed on time etc. pick your battles! Start afresh tomorrow, and I hope you all have a lovely time!

Zero rights to reprimand you from here - we’ve all reached the end of our tether at one point as a parent and if those commenting on your behaviour haven’t experienced that yet then they’re either Mary Poppins, lying, or they will experience it eventually. Don’t beat yourself up, be kind to yourself. A caravan is a very small space for anyone to enjoy and things can boil over in a heartbeat. There’s plenty of parents single or otherwise who haven’t had the pleasure of this holiday so chin up, make the most of it, it won’t be the last time you lose your cool.

x

On holiday I wouldn't mind a late bedtime. However the rule generally in my house is that DS has to behave if he wants to stay up later!

At 11 they should have a better understanding. Talk to both of them. Hope the rest of your holiday is better.

This!

Huge expectations and costs, maybe overexcited kids. Deep breath OP, wishing you well. Taking your children away on your own is hard, give yourself a break.

I sometimes wonder why we bother with holidays at all! ... so stressful and impossible to please everyone in a mixed age family! Days out are the way to go ....