Mamas when did you know your child was autistic?

[Purpletaco]

When did you guys know your little one was showing signs of being Autistic?
Im going to sound abit crazy my dd is 14 months she cannot walk, she doesn’t play with toys she will just hold them, she will sometimes press a button or open and close a door but not actually play, she use to eat everything feed herself the lot now she just throws it and doesn’t seem interested in food, she doesn’t clap, wave, blow kisses, high fives nothing like that, she was answering to her name and recently that has stopped, the only ‘command’ i would say she sometimes knows is come to mama, she will babble a lot the only clear words she says is dada mama (sometimes but rarely nana, baba), she loves tags on 3 soft toys which are connected together and she has to hold it constantly or rub it on her nose/face she even has to sleep with it or she will cry. She has recently found her hands she keeps putting them infront of her and she will just look at them. Those are just some of the things from the top of my head, I had her hv appointment at 11 months and the hv didn’t have any concerns but neither did I until she turned 1, she hasn’t got another hv appointment until Shes 2 but im thinking about booking another one..
Am I over reacting?
i feel like I might be but then i don’t know I have a ds who is on the way to being diagnosed with adhd/asd and he is 6 and I know you shouldn’t compare children but he played with toys from early on he did all the gestures he walked he understood early on he just couldn’t talk ect ..
Any advice is much appreciated

Bump

I suspected at three months when he didn’t hold eye contact when breast feeding. He was also very sensory seeking so the best way to calm him was to press his cheek really really hard. He used to obsess over the letter a (went to the beach and he wrote ‘a’ in the sand literally hundreds of times. Very academically able at a young age and read super young and fast. Got diagnosed at five after monumental melt down in reception because dining hall was hugely overstimulating and he injured another student.

Age 20 when talking to a psychiatrist about ADHD.

Aged two, but not diagnosed until closer to 4.
He turned two just after lockdown happened So the experts, what I’m sure if it was a result of losing all his social activities that he wasn’t talking.

My DC 'failed' the 9-12m ages and stages (was in the black in all areas) at 9 months, HV came back and repeated it at 12m and they were still in the black for all but one area of development. HV had raised vague concerns at that point too. Child was doing lots of repetitive behaviours, not waving, clapping, pointing, not really engaging. We were seen by Paediatrics who agreed to send the referral for assessment for autism at 2. DC is 2.5 now and we are pretty certain it is autism. DC is making good progress in their development now, but still way behind where they should be.

How are you feeling about it all? It ruined my mat leave, realising my child wasn't like the other babies 😢

My DS developed typically until 20 months, lots of words, counting, eye contact - the over the space of approximately 2 weeks he stopped using words & lost a lot of his skills, he's now 6 & non verbal.

My best advice would be to just seek support early if you're concerned, and follow some speech & language techniques xxx

I thought something was different about him at 8 months. Didn't know much about autism until it was suggested I get the health visitor to check him at his 2 yr old assessment. Diagnosed at 4. If I had known what I know now I'd have known at 8 months.

Age 4-5 but looking back there were signs as a toddler. Unless it’s obvious there’s a lot of toddler behaviour you can just put down to bring a toddler until you get the diagnosis and it clicks together more

DS was around two when I thought he might be and five when diagnosed. Speech delay,walking on ball of feet, overwhelmed at the noise of the hall in school. At football training he wouldn't listen,spin around on the spot then dart off to the woods.

That is very strange @PatheticDistraction?
Has there been any explanation why things changed so dramatically ?

9 months!!

Annoyingly, she’s very academically gifted and masks totally so we haven’t been accepted on to the pathway.

Both of mine displayed signs from the get go. I just didn’t realise what they were.

Suspicious around 12 months. Pretty certain by 15 months, thats when others started seeing things too. Obvious by 18 months. Diagnosed at 2 years.

Some things wouldn't concern me at all e.g. not walking yet. But some others would - mainly the lack of expected interaction.

Has she had her hearing and vision checked?

@deeahgwitch I didn't know about it before, but a regression like this is very common in autism & as far as I know there is no explanation , which makes it even harder
:(

There aren't many conditions where a person loses skills and language rapidly without a cause being identified, it makes it very hard to accept. I think this is why many people believed the (totally debunked) conspiracies around the MMR, people need a reason, and fill that vacuum with theories. I can, hand on heart, say there was no correlation with the jab and our son's regression. I sometimes wonder if he had a virus of some sort - his regression happened right at the end of the second lockdown. Sadly I don't think we'll ever know.

Look back she was a very clingy high needs baby and her tantrums at 2 were way beyond tantrums. She had issues with hearing which masked her shut downs. At 7 I was asking for a CAHMS referal and by the time she was 8 years old I knew rather than suspected.

All milestones were met well a head of time but she is a very bright child.

Age 7-10 we really started thinking it could be ASD. He had sensory issues but so do a lot of kids. He’s “very high functioning”. I know not the correct term but I don’t know how else to describe it. Very academic and loved learning. Loved number and is very good at math. He fit in as a younger child, can mask most issues. Would struggle at home but join in at school. It’s now a bit clearer. When his friends started maturing he was just a bit different. Very rigid with rules, literal understanding of some things, obsessed with time and how long things will take. He’s on the waiting list now.

Similar - age 20 when talking to a psychiatrist about OCD

Suspected at 2/3, suspicions strengthened from 4

Diagnosed at 10

I didn’t really know. It was over 30 years ago and autism wasn’t in the public conscious. It came as quite a shock when he was diagnosed at 4, even though I knew something was the matter from when he was a small baby. The only time I’d ever heard of autism was from Rainman.

It became obvious very quickly that half our family are on the spectrum.

I suspected at 18 months. She was diagnosed at 5 years. In retrospect, it was obvious from day 1.

I think it was the conversations. They were just so different to conversations with other children. She still, at 12, has noticeable difficulties seeing that other people could have a view on anything that differs from hers.

5-6 months old - mainly because of his extreme separation anxiety and intolerance of other people. He'd get so upset if he saw another baby or if a stranger smiled at him. He was only happy if he was with me. All. The. Time. It was atypical and exhausting!

He was diagnosed at 8 I think.

Thank you for replying @PatheticDistraction💐
It must be very hard to accept when he was so different before.
I believe there has to be a reason

17 months was when our very first SALT appointment took place (in my area, there’s no GP involvement). Diagnosed a month before turning 5. This was in late 2019. So that’s how long the process takes.
My advice if you have even the tiniest inclination that there could be something going on, go to your SALT drop in. If there’s definitely nothing to worry about, they will tell you early on. In total, we attended about 18 different appointments from start to finish and only 3 of those were part of the actual assessment. The other 14/15 appointments were prior to the waiting list (including one with a Paediatrician) and every appointment was with someone different. They said to me that this is done to ensure that only kids who they believe ‘could’ be diagnosed, join the waiting list. So in other words, if your child doesn’t meet the criteria for ASD then you’ll soon be told!

Also, mine too had regression around that age. Especially with regards to food. Used to eat anything given, slept wonderfully inc. as a newborn, slept through the night from the very night she was born! Then something changed around 15/16 months. According to the ASD team at my hospital (who diagnosed her) it’s very common and is why people started hypothesising that ASD was caused by vaccines as it usually happens around the time they have a major vaccination; However this has been thoroughly debunked and disproven.