Am I over reacting

[ThatPoisedCyanCrow]

Hi so I have a question about a neighbor of ours.yesterday there son who I would say is about 4 or 5 was outside playing with my children 5 & 6. As we get into the car my children come to me and told me that the boy got his privates out and started weeing infront of hi my kids was visibly shocked that the boy exposed himself so I went to tell their parents and they didn't seem to appear concerned at all not just this occasions must mostly I let slide the always play on out front door bikes against our front door. They climb over our fence in the back and aslo they are outside naked at the front! It makes me feel very uncomfortable but I don't want to get onto the wrong side with neighbors but they sort of just stared at me vacancy and nodded. I'm not sure what to do or how to come across.

He went for a fresco wee

must mostly I let slide the always play on out front door bikes against our front door.

I suspect it’s this that really pisses you off 😆

I wouldn’t worry about an early infants child but if they were still doing it at 10 then I would be concerned.

Okay so I take it I am over reacting lol. 😅

Yes and it would appear it’s rubbing off on your children if they were so shocked by a 5 year old taking a pee in front of them

where were you at the time? You could see their shock, if you say “visibly” so did you also see him pee?

Okay so I wrote it in a rush at the time what I am saying is, I am more concerned than annoyed. When young children get left alone unsupervised naked and one of them are about 9 years old. when I mean children it's 2 houses of the neighbors kids, they do not speak very good English. The children are mostly unsupervised and one of the parents lock their gates and and doors because the kids are always banging on it to go in. The young child throw dirty used nappies over my fence more that 1 occasions along with rocks, shoes, rubbish.... The kid climbs on high fences and just stares as me whilst I'm in the garden. I like my privacy and at the front it's a carpark where cars come in and out of all the time delivery vans so it's not exactly the safest place to be when they have there own gardens or the park down the road. They climb on the cars. One of the children had the car keys un supervised and started the car! They have thrown stuff at another neighbors window. They peak right inside my house when my windows open. It's more of a concern of where the parents are when they're at the front. 9/10 times they're left unsupervised naked and doing whatever. And the parents I spoke to just didn't care. They run off into the main road as I had to run after them once! Fair enough they don't do that anymore thank god. I'm not the greatest at communication myself let alone confront anyone. I just wanted the parents to be aware of what they was doing but not sure if the situation about getting the private parts out and weeing infront of the children was over reacting. 😅 I don't want to be confronted with naked children staring at me when im entering my own house. It's awkward and uncomfortable and no parents in sight.

I did not see the boy wee I was locking up the shed it happened within a few minutes and they came to me saying his private parts are out and weeing infront of them. Sorry but if a child was to of done that at school and got his private parts out and urinated infront of children would that be acceptable? My son is of or around that age I can't imagine him doing that because he knows where the bathroom is if he needs to go... at least do it in his own private space in his garden.

👋

And what was Social Services response to your report?

Or are you going to drip feed that too, and say you didn't bother telling them about naked 9 year olds starting vans in the street?

Ashamed? Of what?

Oh. Dear.

Well that escalated quickly! One minute it’s a wee, the next thing we know there are naked children crawling all over the street, climbing high fences and starting cars.

I’ve got one son who loves a nature wee then the other who needs a 5* toilet with quilted rolls haha

Yuck, you're right about the peeing, as are your children. The rest also sounds like hell on earth to live next to.

Sorry didn't read the whole thread, but it seems like people say it's normal? Well if it is a 'boy thing' perhaps it's if only people allow it to be, I'd not be impressed if my 3yo didn't even attempt to go to the toilet first.

If I saw a naked 9 year old alone in the street, I'd phone the police or report to social services. Why haven't you?

my son loves a wild wee! Think you’re overreacting.

To busy dealing with her “visibly shocked” children seeing a 5 year old going for an al fresco wee

Nobody reading seems to have grasped the full extent of what's happening, I've read it as these young children are not being cared for in anyway at all, they know no different because they are not being taught by they parents how to behave in society, our children learn from us, with love by teaching them what is right from wrong , i think personaly it sounds like horrendous abuse & neglect to be locked out of they house's left totally unsupervised, the world we live in today is very scary & unsafe place to live in, social services need to be informed to help these children, they deserve to be be loved & cared for, reading all of this message from a concerned mum, has made me worry for they future welfare i seriously think they need to be reported as children at risk , you can report it anonymously do the right thing, help these children, a social worker will decide themselves what will be the best in this situation for these poor uncared for little children

Children walking around naked in the street and clambering on cars - not ok, social services
5 year old boy taking a little outside wee when playing with friends in the garden- ok

It's not ideal, I'd ask my kids to try and remember to go inside to the toilet but it wouldn't worry me at all. It's a bit odd that you led with that situation and not naked kids standing in the street throwing dirty nappies and starting cars.... I mean, call the police or social services if they're being neglected and that's happening but definitely don't mention the 5 yr old playing over and having a garden wee because that's not a social services issue at all. However, if they're shut out their house with no clothes and nobody supervising them and there is antisocial behaviour that's wildly different to your first post and needs reporting.
In answer to your question about wees outside at school, happened twice in my sons reception school class at breaktime on the field, and the teacher gently reminded the child they weren't at home and asked them to use school toilets - total none issue just not very polite/ideal and only in the 4/5yr class where they're new to school, they just forgot they weren't at home.

YAB a bit U to be “shocked” at a 5 yr weeing in the street. Kids do it, and a child “exposing himself” isn’t going to emotionally scar your children for life. Just explain to them that ots always better to use a toilet, if one is available. The vast majority of people will have allowed their children to wee behind a bush when necessary.
The rest of your drip feed is more concerning, but I’m going with YABU to find it less of an issue than your initial headline. If you genuinely believe these children are being neglected, then you have a duty to report it.

So initially op was telling us that a young child took a wee in front of her kids. Then when we weren’t shocked and outraged it escalated into these kids aren’t being looked after properly. Just because they have different standards to you doesn’t mean it’s abuse (which is what I think you’re implying). So be very careful before you firebomb other people’s lives. If you don’t want to let your kids play with them anymore then don’t.

@Tinkerbel64 You obviously haven’t had to deal with ‘horrendous abuse and neglect’ as part of your job. She has not described that at all.