When does 2 kids feel easier?

[AMagnaMater]

With my first time started to feel easier around 4 months and even more so at 6, and it jsut got easier and easier as time went on.
With two kids, one nearly 4 now and baby just turned 1, it still feels really hard, I still feel in survival mode.
I had ppd after my first, and not this time round, so I definitely thought it'd be easier. Going from 0 to 1 kids was an absolute shock to my system, but from 1 to 2, I don't think I was as shocked even though it felt like I got no rest. So why am I struggling so much still, I can't even look one day ahead, I'm still living day by day.
It might be because external help fo village is limited, or that my 1 year old is still breastfeeding, won't take a bottle, will only feed to sleep and doesn't stay too long with anyone else.

TlDdr when does survival mode with 2 kids end, or when does life with 2 kids feel easier?

With my first born so far, 3 has been the worst age for me, I miss when he was 2! Mind you, maybe it was just him struggling with having a sibling and all the changes that have come with it.

We have a 4 year old and 18 month old and it hasn’t got easier yet. I’m hoping in the next 6 months it might. We don’t have any help either, it’s very hard.

When she was a baby I said 6 months then I said okay no its very hard maybe 8 months then I said no its still hard maybe 1 years old but now she's 12 months, I've realised that it might be a good yea for two or more until it gets easier 😭

Exactly what I was saying - when the younger one turns 4.

I think when my youngest reached 2 and my eldest was 5 it got much easier. My youngest communication was better, he had started to sleep better too. So hopefully light at the end of the tunnel for you is coming soon. We ended up talking to a sleep consultant to help with sleeping as he fed to sleep too and she changed the game for us!

I'd love if you could share which sleep consultant

https://www.instagram.com/sleepysweet_pea/

It's getting easier all the time but I don't thing there's been a sudden point where it got easier, you just swap one frustration for another!
Currently approaching 3 and approaching 6 and it still doesn't feel like we're out of the tunnel yet! I'm sat here surrounded by piles of toys wondering whether to have my 20th cup of tea today...
The worst setbacks are when everyone is ill or tired, or starting school/nursery etc.

My youngest is 2yr2 months, eldest 3.5yrs. It's very difficult, tho if it was just the 3yr old, it would be easy. Together, they're both pains.

Doesn't help youngest is very cling and I get "carry, carry" almost non stop. Eldest at this age would entertain herself with plant pots in the greenhouse for half hour.

2yr old is also having many tantrums. Eldest was the same 2-2yr9months.

I think next year, 3 and 4 will be a lot easier.

I think you have to do things to make your life easier. If you want to stop breastfeeding then do it. If babies one then they're old enough to be fine without and to use a straw or sippy cup. Start getting them used to going to sleep without you. Loads of sleep advice on Instagram or books, without breaking the bank on a sleep consultant.

I don't mean that to sound dismissive. My first baby was horrendously difficult and it made me want to do things differently second (and third) time around.

Hang on in there!

I hate to say that mine are 6 and 4, and I still find them hard work. Yes, easier than at 4 and 2, but they are still quite relentless. However, now the 6yo has started going to friends by himself and is becoming more independent. So, I assume once youngest is around 6-7, life will be easier. Now they still have tantrums, fight with each other, need generally a lot of attention, bedtime can be a struggle..etc. I also think that by this stage you simply start feeling tired and fed up of the small children stage, which seems to have lasted forever by now.