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Original poster

Child’s father threatening court for custody

55 replies

Wednesdaymornings · 27/02/2025 23:07

Hi all, am in a bit of a panic as my child’s father called me out of the blue to tell me he will be taking me to court for custody arrangements.

Reason being is that he can’t trust me apparently. Didn’t elaborate on what that meant and I have never stopped him from seeing our son. We broke up a year ago and ever since he has been horrible to me and very inconsistent with contact.

Our child is only 2 years old and barely has any relationship with him so if he does go to the courts it’s unlikely he will get 50/50 right?
Id also like to know roughly what age they would grant 50/50 if after some time he was consistent with contact,

I’m in two minds as to whether I think he acc is telling the truth or just trying to scare me, his actions over the past year have showed me he doesn’t give 2 shits about our child since he can’t have me. He didn’t even get him a Christmas present! And now he wants custody. Do me a favour! He’s a very spiteful man tho and quite unpredictable, so a part of me is nervous he’s being for real and I’d just like to get ahead of my self and here others experience with this.

thanks

OP posts:
TizerorFizz · 28/02/2025 23:00

Courts put dc first. Not he said, she said. It’s what is best for the child. I would not get involved in the petty side of this. What matters is what the pp said above regarding her visit to a solicitor.

Grey Rock needs caution. If you appear disinterested the other party will say this in court. It will be used to say you don’t care about DC being with you, or engaging effectively so of course 50/50 is best. Neither should you agree to anything he says. as others have suggested. Be consistent and clear about what you want. It might be better to go to court.

Jess2005 · 20/12/2025 08:27

I had a my baby almost 4 months ago but im not ready to be without him yet, but the fathers dad wants to take him out for a couple hours, which im not comfortable with. My babys father and i broke up a year ago a little after we found out i was pregnant, we lived with my parents and he was constantly out the house for work or off to his friends, he cane back one night with weed and his it in my room thinking i wouldn’t find it, baring in mind i have a 5 year old who also stayed in that room. he drank every night, used my money to buy alcohol, but lied about it. He then lost his job due to a apprentice taking the mick out of his accent and his answer to burn the 17 year old with hot tweezers. Shortly after he moved back home which is a few hours away due to us breaking up. Since he moved i was doing pregnancy without him, he was too busy to come to scans or he didn’t feel welcome to come. I still worked throughout the whole pregnancy, i bought everything, clothes, cot, swing, milk, bottles etc, all the essentials i had bought and looked for, he never offered to buy anything. He moved closer once baby was born, and has only every sent £305 in child maintenance, he earns more than £1,500 a month. but recently due to arguments and him not wanting to come to mine to see baby he doesn’t want to send anymore money, which im not complaining about because i dont NEED it. but im still not comfortable allowing him to take the baby a couple hours, im not ready to be without him yet, but babys father is threatening me with court to get the time hes allowed, but he also works 3 jobs and doesn’t get much time off to come see his son, but i have given his chances after to chances to come over on his days off and when i haven't got plans, i asked him to tell me his free days weeks prior so i dont make any plans, but he tells me the night before, what so i do, im only young and it’s completely stressing me out.

TheFormidableMrsC · 20/12/2025 09:46

Jess2005 · 20/12/2025 08:27

I had a my baby almost 4 months ago but im not ready to be without him yet, but the fathers dad wants to take him out for a couple hours, which im not comfortable with. My babys father and i broke up a year ago a little after we found out i was pregnant, we lived with my parents and he was constantly out the house for work or off to his friends, he cane back one night with weed and his it in my room thinking i wouldn’t find it, baring in mind i have a 5 year old who also stayed in that room. he drank every night, used my money to buy alcohol, but lied about it. He then lost his job due to a apprentice taking the mick out of his accent and his answer to burn the 17 year old with hot tweezers. Shortly after he moved back home which is a few hours away due to us breaking up. Since he moved i was doing pregnancy without him, he was too busy to come to scans or he didn’t feel welcome to come. I still worked throughout the whole pregnancy, i bought everything, clothes, cot, swing, milk, bottles etc, all the essentials i had bought and looked for, he never offered to buy anything. He moved closer once baby was born, and has only every sent £305 in child maintenance, he earns more than £1,500 a month. but recently due to arguments and him not wanting to come to mine to see baby he doesn’t want to send anymore money, which im not complaining about because i dont NEED it. but im still not comfortable allowing him to take the baby a couple hours, im not ready to be without him yet, but babys father is threatening me with court to get the time hes allowed, but he also works 3 jobs and doesn’t get much time off to come see his son, but i have given his chances after to chances to come over on his days off and when i haven't got plans, i asked him to tell me his free days weeks prior so i dont make any plans, but he tells me the night before, what so i do, im only young and it’s completely stressing me out.

I would start your own thread as this is a zombie thread and OP hasn’t posted in a while.

Interested in this thread?

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Lennonjingles · 20/12/2025 09:56

Jess2005 · 20/12/2025 08:27

I had a my baby almost 4 months ago but im not ready to be without him yet, but the fathers dad wants to take him out for a couple hours, which im not comfortable with. My babys father and i broke up a year ago a little after we found out i was pregnant, we lived with my parents and he was constantly out the house for work or off to his friends, he cane back one night with weed and his it in my room thinking i wouldn’t find it, baring in mind i have a 5 year old who also stayed in that room. he drank every night, used my money to buy alcohol, but lied about it. He then lost his job due to a apprentice taking the mick out of his accent and his answer to burn the 17 year old with hot tweezers. Shortly after he moved back home which is a few hours away due to us breaking up. Since he moved i was doing pregnancy without him, he was too busy to come to scans or he didn’t feel welcome to come. I still worked throughout the whole pregnancy, i bought everything, clothes, cot, swing, milk, bottles etc, all the essentials i had bought and looked for, he never offered to buy anything. He moved closer once baby was born, and has only every sent £305 in child maintenance, he earns more than £1,500 a month. but recently due to arguments and him not wanting to come to mine to see baby he doesn’t want to send anymore money, which im not complaining about because i dont NEED it. but im still not comfortable allowing him to take the baby a couple hours, im not ready to be without him yet, but babys father is threatening me with court to get the time hes allowed, but he also works 3 jobs and doesn’t get much time off to come see his son, but i have given his chances after to chances to come over on his days off and when i haven't got plans, i asked him to tell me his free days weeks prior so i dont make any plans, but he tells me the night before, what so i do, im only young and it’s completely stressing me out.

Baby is still young, so if you don’t want him to take baby, say no, let him take it to Court. Why doesn’t he want to see baby where you are, can you meet at a coffee shop or a park if he doesn’t want to come to your home.

Jess2005 · 20/12/2025 09:59

Lennonjingles · 20/12/2025 09:56

Baby is still young, so if you don’t want him to take baby, say no, let him take it to Court. Why doesn’t he want to see baby where you are, can you meet at a coffee shop or a park if he doesn’t want to come to your home.

Show quote history

Ive allowed him to to on a walk while im with them but he never takes the opportunity, like even when hes at my home i go to another room so he can spend that time with his son, but its never enough, he wants to have him overnight and im not comfortable with that either, he has absolutely nothing to have baby overnight, hes not even got a house. he tells me hes spoke to someone and he’s allowed all this and that because hes on the certificate. wether thats true or not, i dunno

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