Breastfeeding and Company

[PollyHutchen]

How do new mothers feel when visitors come and the baby needs a feed? Do people retreat do a quiet corner, or just stay put even if feeding in front of company makes them feel exposed?

I my home I fed my baby wherever and in front of whoever
if YOU feel exposed then do what makes you feel ok

I would feed her wherever but also use it as an excuse to retreat when I’d had enough 😂

I used it as an excuse to take the baby off somewhere quiet.
You may find once you're more confident in doing it you will feel more comfortable around people.
Congratulations on your new baby x

I thought I'd struggle but I really don't. I try to not flash my nipple but my baby needs feeding so I'm gonna feed them, I'm not moving to do so unless it's to get more comfortable. Like I dare you to complain that I'm feeding my baby, especially when you've come to visit said baby .

Baby is 12 days old, atm it depends on the visitor. If it's anyone medical eg midwife/HV I don't mind feeding in front of them, or if it was a good friend of mine. In laws etc I'd rather go off by myself plus tbh it gives me and the baby a break.

I've been more comfortable side-lying as well but we're both getting more practised at upright. I think once we're more used to breastfeeding I can start using a cover and feel more comfortable doing it out and about as well

Edit: I should add, that's just how I feel right now personally BUT I think everyone should have the innate right to feed their child wherever they feel comfortable and no one should be made to feel that they need to leave the room or cover up for other people's sake

I whip 'em out wherever Infront of whoever. If you'd like privacy though, then there's nothing wrong with that either. Especially as a very new mum! Do whatever makes you comfortable.

Feed if the guests are adult women, retreat if it’s blokes or kids. The only reason I wouldn’t breast feed in front of kids is because I remember finding it odd when I was a kid.

I just fed on the sofa, I didn't move to a different room. It never made me feel exposed though, I just let my top fall so that it covered pretty much everything.

I just fed the baby when they needed feeding and so did My daughter with her children there is certainly no need to hide away and so it in secret. It is a natural thing.

Maybe you felt it odd because you weren't used to it. It was the most natural thing in the world to my grandchildren to see their mum feeding their little brother so much so that they pretended to breast feed their dolls., and it was the same when my children were young.
The more children are exposed to it the more normalised it will become.

I never moved because I never felt exposed. Flipped boob out of bra under my top, baby nearby, lift top and latch. Nipple exposed for about 3 seconds if that and otherwise behind baby's head even before they are fully latched.

I would probably go sit in my comfy chair where I’d always feed them. Not because I’m trying to be discreet or am embarrassed, but because it’s comfortable and I wouldn’t normally feed them just at the table (not comfortable). Also I quite like a break from houseguests so it’s a nice chance for peace and quiet! Feeds were my me time to sit and not have to deal with anything else. Dh can sort them out.

If we were out and about, I’d feed them wherever.

This.

My advice to new mothers is to limit visits from people you don't feel comfortable feeding in front of.

Also - I thought i wouldn't breastfeed in front of my dad or FIL. I was fine doing it because as soon as I said "I'm going to feed him now" they gave me privacy even if only looking jn another direction while I latched!

I fed anywhere-including Canterbury Cathedral in the presence of, although not under the eye of,the Archbishop.

I had a couple of family members who, although they never said, I knew were made uncomfortable by it, so I'd drape a scarf over the baby and me. Although once you've got the hang of it there's nothing to see. Try feeding g in front of a mirror. You'll be amazed at how "discreet" (ugh!) it is.

I've not done it, but most women I've known have just openly fed at home. If out they often use a kind of modesty cloth thing that covers baby and boob. It's not like anyone sees anything anyway, other than the back of a baby's head attached to some skin.

Depends on you.
I always went into a different room. But it's because I personally don't like breastfeeding in front of others, plus I always needed extra things - breastfeeding pillow and nipple shield.

Loads of mothers who I visited or came to ours just breastfeed in front of everyone. These days you can buy such great nursing clothing, people won't see anything.

Okay, I'll come clean. It's not me. It's a younger friend. Small but healthy aby (not Caesarian or forceps delivery - just in hospital overnight) coming up to 3 weeks and feeding well.

We visited - having been invited over - brining some food to share and she retreated to far end of room to feed baby rather than eating with us, which meant she was basically out of conversation for well over an hour as well as not getting lunch. After we'd eaten I came over to join her as I felt she was being left out/I wasn't really seeing her just her boyfriend. Which mean the group - my partner and hers - then came over.

She said she didn't like people seeing her feeding so of course we all instantly retreated. It also emerged that she'd only been out of the house once that morning - for an hour with the baby in the buggy - since the birth. She'd not felt ready and putting it in the pram was all too complicated.

Bit worried about her, while also realising everyone is different and she needs to feel comfortable and supported.

I would just feed in front of whoever was there. My only issue was I had extremely squirty boobs, so would often shoot jets of milk across a room. I learned to get the baby on at lightning speed.

I would tell guests to clear out as I found it stressful having an audience if the baby wouldn't latch. And sometimes I used it as an excuse to go off and have some quiet time, especially with visiting relatives I didn't like that much.

I would feel worried too. It can be normal to feel shy at first but not going out of the house is perhaps a sign she’s struggling. Her partner can help with the pram. Maybe volunteer to take her to a new mums group or accompany her on a walk?!

3 weeks is absurdly early, just leave her be, you can feel very vulnerable feeding especially the first time. I was only comfortable feeding at home, second time round anywhere that worked :-D
When baby gets older suggest coming just after a feed

I fed anywhere-including Canterbury Cathedral in the presence of, although not under the eye of,the Archbishop
Ditto! Regularly at church and for a few months the cathedral was my parish church so I was there most weeks. Justin was only there one of those weeks though. Easter Sunday 2018! Just after he'd presided at Harry and Meghan's wedding. He stopped me at the end to say hello to the baby and tell me how tired William had looked at the wedding as Louis was still a newborn.

Fairly early but not absurdly so. Late enough that worrying she's struggling and would benefit from some gentle encouragement to see if she wants help getting out and about isn't unreasonable.

Im normally happy to feed anywhere, though I have one family member who will come and stand over my shoulder to look at the baby whilst am feeding which makes me feel very uncomfortable, and I hate having my personal space invaded at the best of times, but this is when I can’t just get up and move away, so when she visits I’ll always go feed in a different room. You could also buy a cover up, I have one specifically for if we are out with same family member and don’t have the option to go to a different room.