Breastfeeding and Company

[PollyHutchen]

How do new mothers feel when visitors come and the baby needs a feed? Do people retreat do a quiet corner, or just stay put even if feeding in front of company makes them feel exposed?

I'd have to disagree, I was perfectly content at home and would have hated any hints that I needed to be getting out and about or feeding in front of people, not to mention the pain from still recovering. Everybody is very different post partum I think

At 3 weeks I don't think I'd taken my daughter out in the pram. My in-laws did it around that time.
I covered up in front of my father and father in law but no one else. My baby had feeding issues and wouldn't stay on the breast. My dad went to brew up or do the washing up every time I fed her.

3 weeks still felt very new and I was still figuring out life and adjusting to broken sleep. It was probably 6-8 weeks before I was feeling more comfortable with being out of the house. For the first 2-3 weeks my daughter was needing to be stripped down to her nappy every feed to get her to feed and was starting to have feeding aversions with some feeds so it felt safer to be at home in those initial weeks

It's a difficult one as everyone is different
Partners dad and grandma visited when baby was a few days old, I was still getting to grips with feeding and needed cushions/help getting the right position, so when she needed feeding I went upstairs. Fairly quick probably 30 mins inc nappy change as she would fall asleep very quickly on the breast
My family (mum, sisters, nieces and nephews, & my dad) came when she was just under a week and I fed in the armchair in the corner of the small room as with the feeding pillow I was already more confident, and with my sister's both bf or tried to I felt ok in front of them
Was going out for walks after a few days and out to baby group, cafe, feeding wherever from 3 weeks as then she fed for ages so I'd always be excluded almost if I took myself away to feed

Just an update. My friend still is very much keeping at home, though it's over 7 weeks now. She is more relaxed about feeding there in front of other people.

But she is still reluctant to make any plans about going out, because she can't predict naps etc. Her concern is that the baby might get hungry somewhere where she doesn't feel comfortable feeding and/or can't feed her instantly. So she is not yet ready to drive over to me - a 2 mile journey - in case the baby got hungry while strapped in the babyseat.

I am not sure how many mothers have this sort concern, because my own experience was different. While I'd always try and feed my own baby daughter as quickly as possible, after the first couple of weeks there was stuff I had to do which sometimes meant a short delay

Could she have some postnatal anxiety/depression? I had postnatal depression and I started a baby class at 8 weeks and I think that was the first time I deliberately left the house for an activity. It was bloody hard I think both me and my baby cried for the entire time that i was out of the house.
It took a lot out of me and the next day I could barely get out of bed. I had a high needs baby to and it was so incredibly stressful to leave the house and it had quite a negative impact on my wellbeing. I really pushed myself to do more than I was capable of because of the rhetoric that it good to get out and be around people but for me it really was beyond what I could manage.

It sounds like she's having a hard time figuring out her new life. I think the 4th trimester is as much about the mum learning to be a mum as it is the baby learning to be in the outside world. My baby cried a lot and it was torture I'd do anything to avoid it although it was pretty much impossible.

Bugger what others think if your little ones hungry feed them 😊

When I first read this I thought ‘only 2 miles, yeah surely that should be ok!’ but then remembered around that time my DD was feeding for an hour, then off for an hour, repeat. And just getting out of the house took ages because she’d usually need a nappy change, then sometimes would need another change once we got into the car…

Looking back now as a parent of a toddler I can’t understand why I found it so hard and yet I did. I didn’t start any baby classes until 3-4 months.

I think it’s lovely you’re looking out for your friend - keep an eye on her, but I wouldn’t rush to any conclusions as even 7 weeks is still very early.