How independent is your 5/6 year old...

[BloodyGhosts]

When it comes to going to sleep and getting up in the morning?

My almost-6 year old DD still won't fall asleep on her own (neither will 3yo DS, with whom she shares a bunk bed). More annoyingly, she rarely gets out of bed by herself in the morning and will call to us until we go into her her. We've told her not to, and that she's old enough to get up by herself, but nothing sticks.

The evenings I can handle, but the mornings are driving me mad - it's such an irritating way to be woken up each day.

What's typical at this age? Just trying to get a sense of what I should be expecting from her, before I start getting tougher with her about it!

DS (nearly 6) typically needs someone with him while going to sleep. Or at least until he's verrrry close to falling asleep.

In the morning he wakes up and climbs into our bed the second he's awake

I gently trained my 2 year old to stop getting used to falling asleep with me, and transitioned him quite early out of a cot to a bed he could get in and out of, i told him one evening at bedtime that he can just hop out of bed in the morning and walk to us and he did! I think at his age he enjoyed that sense of independence..
my honest opinion is that your daughter keeps doing it because you keep going to her.. suggest some things she can get up to go and do when she wakes (play or draw or read or even come to your bedroom) but that you wont be coming to fetch her and then stick to your guns! Im pretty sure itll take around three mornings and she will be in the rhythm ..

Story, hug and kiss, lights out and leave.
We have never done this sitting a vigil by the kids before sleep because we didn’t want to make a rod for our own backs.

My 5 year old does this by herself although once a week I sleep in her bed at her request. She will get up in the night to go to the loo and settles herself back to sleep. Her older sister on the other hand often needs to be held to sleep. They’re very different people.

My 5 year old goes to bed independently after we have a story, he looks at his dinosaur or tractor book for a few minutes then lights out.

He has his alarm clock set for 7am, gets up & comes down for breakfast. He shares a bedroom & bunk with his brother & he’s a 4th child so goes with the flow.

Agreed.
DS was a terrible sleeper as a small baby/toddler so I was determined to get him into a sensible routine.

He gets himself dressed and ready for bed does his own toothpaste etc but we supervise brushing and go over it after he's had a try. He chooses a story and then goes to sleep pretty swiftly.

He gets up in the morning and sorts himself out getting dressed on school days and plays in his room until breakfast, on weekends comes in our room for cuddles but other than that he's pretty independent.

DS gets into bed with a book and reads to himself. He will call if he has a problem, but this is only occasionally. In the morning he gets up and plays in his room until his older sister wakes up. Then they go downstairs together to watch TV. Sleep was tricky when he was a baby/toddler so counting our blessings now!

Is the issue the bunk bed and that she is up high?

My youngest is 5, he has a bedtime story then it's a quick cuddle and lights out. We've not stayed with either kid to fall asleep since they were tiny babies.

In the morning he knows to stay in his room until 7 then will go downstairs and watch tv with his big brother (who will usually sort breakfast too).

I sit with my 5 year old until she's nearly asleep and then say goodnight.
She's never called me to come through and get her in the morning, she just gets up

5.5 year old, story, cuddles & kisses, lights out and door closed. Occasionally he'll holler he wants another kiss/cuddle, but he goes to sleep by himself in his room.

In the morning he'll get up, turn his lamp on once he's checked the time (after 6am) then he can colour at his desk, play quietly, read a book. He'll go toilet and get himself ready for school.

He's very independent and wants to be like his big sis (she's 10)

My daughter is seven and a half so very independent in the mornings, getting dressed etc. I just wanted to say that she still needs one of us to stay with her in her room until she's asleep. I know it's not for everyone, but for me I think she won't be this little, and needing us this much forever, and if it's something she needs at this stage to feel secure, I don't mind at all. We (not both of us! We alternate) sit on her beanbag next to her bed and read on our phone so it's no hassle really.

Both my 6yr old and 3yr old will go to sleep on their own but they do listen to a Tonie Box when they are in bed. Then as soon as they wake up in the morning they come into our room and climb into bed with us

My 8yo & 6yo both go to sleep in their own rooms after "quick hugs & kisses" (it started getting silly with extra hugs & kisses going on for upwards of 20minutes!) they both like listening to audio books on their Tonie boxes.
On waking, (around 7am-7.30am) they put their specs on, go to the bathroom then pop their heads around my door & say good morning before asking if they can go downstairs & watch TV (no TV on school mornings or any morning we need to be out early for clubs) & they usually help themselves to breakfast.
They both get ready for bed (pjs, toilet & I supervise teeth cleaning - less so for 8yo) with minimal supervision.
Mornings however 🤬 they get dressed after breakfast as they are muckpups & we only have enough uniform for a fresh one each day (no spares I mean) they have to be prompted & reminded to get dressed 🤬🤬🤬
They each got new digital alarm clocks for Christmas, so I'm hoping 🤞🏻 it will help with them getting a bit more clued up on how long they take to do things & see if they can "race" against yesterday's time to get dressed. 🤞🏻🤣

My 6 year old will go to sleep by himself but he needs a lot of cuddles first and I have to promise to check on him after 10 minutes.
In the morning he'll wake up and listen to music but he doesn't get up by himself but that's more because he knows he needs his teeth brushed first so needs me or his dad to do that.

This morning he woke up, knocked on my door until I woke up, then went back to his room to listen to music because he's a troll child

Ds5 has never fallen asleep on his own. If we made an attempt to leave the room he just gets up and follows us. He doesn't like to be alone so we just stay with him until he falls asleep. And he always ends up in my bed every night.

As ops say: I know this won't be forever so I just go with it. He falls asleep as soon as the books are done.

DS (6) nearly 7, was a total pain in the arse going to bed till about 4 months ago. It took a lot of explaining and getting cross and calling daddy to get involved but it finally sank in. Now he can get ready himself and be in bed with 10mins or so from when told to go.

mornings since about 4 he gets up with bigger siblings and gets himself cereal. He gets his uniform on too without prompting but he does have the bigger ones modelling the routine for him.

DS is nearly 6 and still yells WAKING UP TIME when his GroClock changes to show the sun. We still do bath, help him get into PJs, brush teeth and read to him. He loves being read to and is nowhere near ready to be get himself ready for bed or in the morning,

My 5 year old goes to sleep on his own - listening to his yoto player

In the morning if he is up earlier than his gro clock, he entertains himself. He will get himself dressed if I lay out his clothes but sometimes his trousers are back to front 😂

My 5 year old doesn't need us to stay with him until he's asleep but we do usually read him a few chapters of our current book, have a chat and then leave when he's asleep. He will go to sleep by himself with a podcast or stories on his yoto player as long as the door is open and you promise to check in on him if necessary though.

He gets up by himself most mornings once his yoto player light turns green (you can set a time on it to indicate it's morning and time to get up.) He will then go into the living room and watch his tablet/play if noone else is up. He does come and wake me sometimes though as he says he's scared by himself.

I don't think being needed at bedtime is unusual or a bad thing at all at this age. They won't need us forever. To encourage independence in the morning could you use a light, set breakfast out etc?

My 6 year old goes to sleep on her own. On a school morning, I often have to go in and wake her, but sometimes she's just lying in bed awake. On a day she doesn't need to get up, she'll bring herself downstairs as I've been up for at least an hour before her with her 2 year old brother.

My 5yo will get out of bed and go to the toilet. If one of us is already up with our other child, she'll come down stairs and find us, but won't go down by herself so if she's first up will come into my room to wake me.

I wouldn’t let me six year old get up by herself, I’m glad she still calls out when she wakes up. And am shocked so many people are ok with such small children going downstairs by themselves while they stay asleep!

DD5 is put to bed at 7:30pm, kiss good night and lights out and then left to fall asleep.

In a morning she gets up and goes downstairs independently to make herself a drink and watch tv. Her older brother (8) will get up at a similar time, dress himself, brush his teeth and then go and make breakfast for the 2 of them while I’m still in bed!

My kids are early risers (6:30-7am) and parents don’t get out of bed until 8am on weekends so they fend for themselves!

You've sleep trained her to only fall asleep with you.

My 5yo has been falling asleep independently since about 2 after stories, when very tired he'll ask us to leave as he's ready to sleep! My nearly 3yo is the same but does sometimes want an extra cuddle.
They both get up on their own and go for a wee, if dark they'll come into our room. If the light has come on- lumie clocks- then they'll mostly play together or separately until we get up. They wouldn't go downstairs unless we said they could but we don't. And certainly no tv in the morning!
5yo has clothes laid out in his room and can then get dressed on his own after breakfast. Sometimes needs a bit of encouraging.