How do you (and indeed can you) stop little girls becoming "mini-whores in pink and tinsel"

[snickersnack]

I have never come across Miley Cyrus before this Vanity Fair fuss - as the parent of a 3 year old dd I've been spared that for now. But reading Germaine Greer in today's Guardian on the commercialisation/sexualisation of childhood got me wondering about the way she's already turning into a super-girly, pink-obsessed princess. I am pretty sure it's nothing I've encouraged actively - when I look in her wardrobe there's a lot of non-pink stuff there (mostly unworn), she has cars (mostly unplayed with) and I try and remind her regularly that it's not all about being pretty (though I'm not winning that battle).

How do you, as a parent of a young girl, teach them to be feisty and brave and bothered about important stuff? And not a fluffy pink fluffle of a thing.

sykes, my older two dds have that "dragged from a farm" look. They went to a party on Sunday and both refused to brush their hair. One was dressed as a tiger (tigers don't brush their fur) and one as a pirate (pirates have messy hair). [hmmm]

Mine haven't watched that many TV adverts, maybe that does help.

i am sick sick sick of pink.

i hate the fatc that people assume because i have girls we have pink everywhere. dd2+3 room is pink and yellow, and dd1 room is yellow. admittingly they have pink bedding, but that was from when they were younger and before we even knew dd3 was a girl lol.

dd1 is very non-pink. lots of khaki and blue for her.

went to get her trainers, all trainers have various shades of pink on them. she choose ones that were white with a tiniest amount of pink on them.

dd3 is massively into pirtaes, spiderman, superheros in general, cars etc. so we spend a lot of time when in toy shops in the 'boys' section.

i am sick to death of ELC making everything in blue or pink.

dd2 is also a tomboy but loves things to do with animals so is a bit more girly than the other two but still not a pink-girl.

Fio, i have two girls in that age range clothes as well. one is only 5. trying to find jeans that actually cover her hips is hard, they all seem low cut. i have ended up this year buying plain t-shirts so at least their tums are covered.

i wantmy girls to be dressed practically, not in skin shimming, low cut everything.

I find it slightly unsetting when adults slap a 'sexualisation' label on to childish things. My DD (3.6) wants to wear lippy, its got sod all with being 'sexy' and everything to do with mimicing me. I'm not going to stop wearing make up!

I have DD after DS1 & 2, so when she came we were pretty set up, and I didn't actually think we needed any more toys/dolls/stuff. But she wanted dolls and girly stuff, she loves pink. Actually, DS1 rather liked pink and I was very, very proud of him when he stood his ground in the playground and told the boy who was teasing him for his pink lunch box "I like it. So what?" DS2 is footy all the way and has more testosterone that you can shake a stick at.

What she wears/plays with won't make a jot of difference to her attitude. All you can do is teach her by example, let her be what she wants to be, to like what she likes and teach her that that's OK.

Because, sadly, the law of the playground will tell her otherwise.

It's not really the pink I mind, it's the princess stuff (terrible role models, passive wimps sitting around waiting to be rescued and married. Bleurgh. And yes I do know there are various feisty princess books but still...). And the nail parties and make up kits which my dds get given on occasion (though they haven't really played with them). Pink is just a symptom of the overall fluffy passive girly stereotyping which so many toys, books and clothes adhere to.

I agree, Fennel. One of my friend's daughters is so into the whole make up etc things it's weird. She also loves shopping for clothes with her mother on a ridiculously regular basis. However, she's a lovely girl so whatever floats your boat. Shopping is my idea of hell.

Mine watch rather too much telly, ahem, but still manage a somewhat unkempt look.

DDs wanting to use your lipstick/ wear your high heels to look like you is normal and sweet. DDs having their own lipstick/ make up is completely different.

I've just checked on Amazon and see Maeve Binchy's Fairytales for Feminists is available!

A few years ago on Child of our Times, Robert Winston showed how kids around school-going age (or a bit younger) use external signifiers to decude whether someone is a boy or girl and so the whole pink/ blue thing is very important. As they get older, they don't need pink/ blue to show that they are boys/ girls. My argument is that it is very difficult to get girls clothes/ shoes that are comfortable/ practical: pink shows the dirt, glitter is just not nice and tight tops are not comfortable.