PLEASE read - desperate

[sadmumupnorth]

I have had a total of about 5 hours sleep over the last three days and I am completely and utterly exhaisted. It's not my baby can't leep because he sleeps fine it's me. I can't cope and am cryinga as I type this. Please smeone help. I am so desperate and just want some sleep.

sadmum - have you been prescribed antidepressants for your pnd? If so when did you start taking them. Some ADs can take a while to settle into your system and and make you feel quite anxious to start with. I have high levels of anxiety at the moment but because I am not depressed this time (thank god) I am on beta-blockers to slow my heart rate down. This helps me feel less anxious and that helps me sleep better. I also take Kalms and they seem to take the edge of the anxiety too.{{{hugs}}}

Hi sadmum, poor you, you must be knackered. Everything seems distorted when you're tired. Agree with everyone that your friend wouldn't have offered unless you meant it, take her up on it, even if it's just for the company. Is there anything that gets you to sleep? If so could you do it and ask your partner to do the night tonight? Is this your first baby? Have you any mum friends? Sorry to ask so many questions.

Sadmum just seen this - have you tried acupuncture? I found this really helpful when I was in 'super alert mummy' mode and couldn't drop off for hours - especially after being woken up in the night. I slept like a log after the first treatment. I really sympathise it's a horrible state to find yourself in, hope you get some decent rest soon x

friend whose a trainee doctor recommends camomile tea b4 bed, to sleep through.

Hi there,

Agree with what everyone else says and just adding my support. I had this too (diagnosed when my baby was around the same age your baby is). Understand absolutely how it feels - just dreadful.
Is your HV understanding enough for you to talk to?

Mandy

Wow everyone thank you so so much for your kind messages. I am feeling better now after a rest - ctually managed a couple of hours sleep. My DP came home from work and took ds for a little bit (he had to go back though).

My friend came round for the afternooon and took ds out for a walk. It helped and I was able to get some stuff done and rest.

I am worried about how my DP is coping because he is so supportive but does have a very demanding job. I am ashamed to say I woke him up this morning sobbing and screaming because I just couldn't sleep and was so desperately tired.

One thing my freind suggested is the giving up BF may be making my hormones go funny (I started a thread about this earlier..DS is on bottles, whole other story).

I am going to see the HV tomorrow and we speak to her then. .

Really glad you're feeling a bit better today. Personally, I think it's better that your dp knows how "at the end of your tether" you've been feeling.

As you're not bf now, would he be able to take the baby out on a Saturday or Sunday, so you get a day to yourself? You could catch up on a few things but also, VERY IMPT - use at least two thirds of the time to have a snooze/ veg out in front of the box/ have a long relaxing bath etc etc.

Dh used to do this for me and then the other day of the weekend he'd have a lie in.

Just having some "me" time to look forward to can be very helpful.

Take care, keep posting xx.

I totally sympathise wuth you. I suffered PND with my son. The tiredness was so unbelievable. Everybody said 'Just go to bed' but it isn't as easy as that. Mentally you think you can sleep, but physcially it's another story. I had medication for about 6 months and then some counselling which really helped and lots and lots of support from my husband especially when I was crying DAY IN AND DAY OUT!!!
Hang in there sweetie, it WILL get better. I promise!!!

Inability to sleep is a classic symptom of PND. I was just the same when I had my eldest son - I was completely and utterly exhausted, up all hours with a new baby, and even when I had the opportunity to sleep I just couldn't. I would lie there awake, getting more and more frantic at my inability to drop off; knowing time was running out and ds1 would be waking for another feed before long. It was hell.

Are you on anti-depressants? They will start to help after a while, but it can take several weeks. Another thing I can recommend is getting a relaxation tape or CD (I got mine on amazon). Draw your curtains, lie down in bed, and listen to the tape - don't try to sleep. It's very difficult at first but you will get better at the relaxation techniques if you persevere - you can then use them at different times of the day when you are feeling stressed. Sometimes I would start listening to the CD, and would actually drop off naturally after a few minutes - you are teaching your body to relax and wind down.

Best of luck - it will get better, though I know it doesn't feel like it will when you're going through it.

I really know where you are with that one. When I had ds, I would be hysterical with exhaustion and STILL couldn't sleep. I told my health visiter, she called a docter, He prescribed antidepressants and gradully things got better.

Do take up the offer from your friend, you might be able to snooze better if you know that someone who isn't as tired as you is there to take over.

It really does get better, it doesn't stay like this for ever.

Hope that helps

Relaxing tapes is a really good suggestion. You need something to take your mind of the tiredness and I'm sure tapes will help...
Take care, you are not alone!!

Hi Sadmum,

Would also suggest you contact APNI - Association for Post Natal Illness. They are very good and can also help you. Their details are as follows:-

APNI
145 Dawes Road
Fulham
London
SW6 7EB

Tel: 020 7386 0868
Fax: 020 7386 8885

Web: www.apni.org

Best time to telephone:
10.00am - 2.00pm, Monday & Friday;
10.00am - 5.00pm Tuesday - Thursday (answerphone at other times).

I wish you well

Meerkats

Well, I had another night like last night. Fell sleep at about quarter to twelve, woke up again at about half two when ds was waking up for his middle of the night feed.

The joke is, I didn't need to wake up because dp did middle of the night feed so i could sleep through. of course I haven't been able to sleep since. Also as I said before DS sleeps fine, it's not him that is the problem - it's me!

I am going to the doctors today and refusing to leave until they give my sleeping tablets and antidepressants because I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

good for you,have you tried a nice warm bath with lavender oil,that will relax you enough to get off to sleep,but you definatly need help for the PNT,keep in touch

it's tortures isn't it?
I'm sorry I haven't read all this thread, but I know that sleep deprivation doesn't stop just when the kids sleep for longer, it takes a while for you do get out of the habit of waking up. (I haven't slept a full night for 4 years but it's getting better)

is there anyway you could go to a hotel or a friends just for the night just to learn how to get back to sleep. Travelodges are quite inexpensive and there are loads up north.

Also if you feel you just can't get your restorative sleep and your energy levels back to normal you might ask the GP to check your thyroid functions as and underactive thyroid will make you feel this way

Tprture is the right word.

I'm really worried now because I can't keep anything down. As I was up anyway , thought I would have some breakfast and have just bought it back up again. In middle of this I have to feed, chaneg and enetertain my little boy. Also have to get him to the doctors today for his mmunisations I just don't know how I am going to get through it.

The horrib;lle, awful thing is I just know that if I could get some sleep I would feel so much better but I just can't.

I have tried everything, camile tea, baths etc and nothing at all works.

Tprture is the right word.

I'm really worried now because I can't keep anything down. As I was up anyway , thought I would have some breakfast and have just bought it back up again. In middle of this I have to feed, chaneg and enetertain my little boy. Also have to get him to the doctors today for his mmunisations I just don't know how I am going to get through it.

The horrib;lle, awful thing is I just know that if I could get some sleep I would feel so much better but I just can't.

I have tried everything, camile tea, baths etc and nothing at all works.

Tprture is the right word.

I'm really worried now because I can't keep anything down. As I was up anyway , thought I would have some breakfast and have just bought it back up again. In middle of this I have to feed, chaneg and enetertain my little boy. Also have to get him to the doctors today for his mmunisations I just don't know how I am going to get through it.

The horrib;lle, awful thing is I just know that if I could get some sleep I would feel so much better but I just can't.

I have tried everything, camile tea, baths etc and nothing at all works.

Sorry didn't mwn to doub;le post

call your gp today
make an appointment for your blood to be tested for thryoid function and chat to your gp about PND

you don't have to be feeling like this

Good luck, sweetie.

I really feel for you.

Message withdrawn

Thanks again everyone. Sometimes I feel like I am asking for help and banging my head against a brick wall (not literally !!)

Oops, my mum had pnd and she basically had the pull yourslef together lecture ...this was 30 years ago.

Just wanted to check in and let everyone know that things are much better today.

At the doctors yesterday I explained how I was feeling and she prescribed my some Temazepam (to sleep) and AD's. Obviously the AD's will take a while to work.

Also my lovely MiL is coming up to stay for a bit to help us both out.

If that sounds like a magic solution, well - it isn't but it's a big step forward. Have to say my HV and doctors have been absolutely great.

Thank you all so much for listening and for your advice, sympathy and kind thoughts. It really meant a lot to me. My DS thanks you too because mummy has been a lot better today!