My son is due to sit his GCSEs this summer and has told me over the weekend he just isn't going to bother. He is not academic, as hadnore detentions than I have had hot dinners and literally does the bare minimum to not get expeled. His saving grace is that he is polite, kind, always thinks of others and looks out for his mates....always accepts the punishment with good humour. One teacher said he is a joy to teach. She just wishes he actually did the work.
He doesn't want to go to college, reckons he can work for his Dad (we are separated) his Dad has several dubious construction businesses and already takes on 2 people who quite often get laid off as not enough work, much of it is cash in hand as his books only report £25,000 earnings. Also DS and him have a very on off relationship dueto his father's unpredictable temper, at the moment he barely goes round to his Dad's for dinner once a week.
He has sat 2 gcses already as that is how his school works. He missed out on 4s by 4 marks on one subject (we did 10 days ofcramming revision!), and for the other subject, media nvq, he got a distinction for his final assessment, but where he hadn't done well in the other assessments, he just missed the 4 again.
His mocks last month really disappointed him, 4 ungraded, 2 2s and a 1. He now just cannotbe bothered. Why try if he is going to fail anyway. It's like he thinks everyone will laugh at him if he tries and fails. He did the same with Cubs and then Army Cadets....got so far and then it came to an assessment, knew he was weak in one area and despite knowing its commonplace to need several attempts for the first 'star' he just quit and never went back. His LCpl was as stunned as I was as he was enjoying it and doing very well in most areas.
And as for not wanting to go to college, we viewed several colleges and one in particular really inspired him. There were options whatever grade he got, and he asked questions, engaged with staff on the night and genuinely wanted to go. That and an Apprenticeship....but now, nope, nothing.
I struggled to get him to even go to school this morning and where he refuses to do homework,he has 4 afterschool detethis wek, which doesn't help. He just doesn't see the point.
I work full time, I worked my way up through an engineering team to become head of department. Up until last week my evenings have been sat helping him with homework, revision and picking him up from detentions. Now he is refusing to even let me help. At his parents evening, his teachers even said he is bright, he can get 4s or 5s, he just needs to do the work. His science, again, so close! When we did a practise paper last week for his homework, there were only 2 questions he was stuck on. And we don't sit there for hours doing this, we grab a hot chocolate on the sofa and fo 2 x 10 min slots of a weekday evening. That's all he was prepared to do.
How do I get him to see he is throwing it all away, without adding pressure over these exams?
What else can I do? I am gutted for him! I have notified the school too.
Background, he is a July born so will still be 15 when he sits exams. He hangs round with a bunch of kids who are not intending on college and just want to do nothing, or work with their parents. I have DS 28 nights out of 30. It primarily rests with me as his Dad has a bull in a china shop approach. DS is the most laid back kid, nothing stresses him (other than his Dad), even constant detentions it seems.
Please help