Gift for class mate? Who did says is not really a friend ?

[Rosemarie86]

My dd was invite to a 6th birthday party from school which we accepted and I even mentioned the nut allergies on the rsvp. We then had to candle super last minute Saturday morning ( when the party was at 4pm) due to lack of sleep with a 7week old baby. My question is, is it appropriate to take the already bought toy into class on Monday for the child whose party we was due to attend? Thanks

It's fine to take into school, probably best at pick up so it's not hanging around the cloakroom all day. Or give to the teacher to hand over at schools end.

Yes. They had presumably catered for DD and they are going to be at school together a long

Yes, they would have spent money on your child-activity/food/party bag. You should give the gift.

Yes, of course, it’s fine. Actually, it would probably be a bit rude not to since you cancelled on them.

Yes this. We've had to cancel last minute due to illness once or twice and always brought the present to school after.

Yes do take in the gift. It shows your cancellation was genuine and not “couldn’t be bothered”.

Also wondering why poor sleep with a newborn means 6yo misses the party - in your shoes I’d have dropped her off an enjoyed the peace for an hour or two? Or was it not a drop off party?

Hope better sleep soon x

Yes, you should bring the gift to school. I also don’t understand why your six year old had to miss the party, she must have been very disappointed.

I also have a six yo with a nut allergy and we can't drop and run yet unless the party parents are sufficiently comfortable with epipens.

I don't know that I would've cancelled because of newborn sleep though, but we have two parents available at the weekend so we can divide and conquer.

Nope it was not a drop off party, they had also told me there was not food only snacks but o told about allergy anyway. Also was not a pay by head party either was just in a small community room used for army children with a couple toys and once small piece soft play.

Also would be be reasonable since I told them I’d be bringing his present into school to then expect the party bag? I mean is that not why people give them because they receive gifts?

Ok then would it be expected to receive a party bag or whatever would have been given at the party? Since I’ve brought in a gift to school?

I wouldn't expect a party bag, no. They're a thank you for coming to the party (and a "please fuck off now" ) and you didn't go to the party.

You're really overthinking this. You have the present, so just bring it to school tomorrow and explain to DD it's because we still want to wish James a happy birthday. You can forget about it by lunchtime tomorrow.

No because it’s not a swap! Just send the bloody gift! 😂

Take the present in, if they happen to have brought a party bag that’s lovely, if they haven’t it’s no big deal

That’s slightly CF territory, op! I certainly would t expect it, no.

Errr no. Any surplus party bags probably got given to random siblings who turned up at pick up time (well that’s what we always did). You can’t ask this!

I’m guessing your DD is sad to have missed it and you’re hoping the party bag would soften it a little? Next time maybe one of you battles through the tiredness and takes her… that’s how having two goes!!

Just take the present, it's a nice thing to do and already purchased. They may or may not have kept a party bag. It's not expected.

Why did you cancel, was the baby up all night? Couldn't their father have stepped in?

Party bags are a ‘please leave now’ signal. I wouldn’t think to give one after the event.

Why on earth would you expect the party bag 😂 That’s just hilarious.

No dd is not sad he didn’t want to go anyway, I spent 30£ on a present and told them on Saturday that we was unable to make it but I’d still bring the present into school Monday so they are very aware. Just thinking if it was me I’d defo have saved cake / party bag if someone went to the trouble of getting my child a gift. Guess that just me

You sound rude and hard work. Even a party in local hall with what you clearly deem inferior entertainment requires planning and prep. All because you didn’t get sleep the prev night for a party at 4pm

You spend £30 on a present for a 6 year old that isn't even a friend?
You’re either trolling us or living in SW1A 1AA

Is there something wrong with you socially?

Are you angry about something?

Geez, this is harsh. Some people do indeed have trouble with social scenarios, and given OP is asking for advice on something reasonably straightforward it might be reasonable to assume this is an area they aren't particularly comfortable with.