I want another baby but live in a 1 bed flat.

[HughesDad98]

Hello looking for advice

me and my wife age 25 & 26

have a 3 year old son , 4 early next year.

we own a 1 bedroom studio flat that 3 of us and a cat live in have lived there for 5 years.

we have debt, both of us work full time, and have some spare money. But not alot.

we have discussed having another baby since our first was born and we still talk about it now, we really want another but the thoguht of money and the place we live in keeps stopping us.

need advice,

we can sell the flat and pay off all debts with the sale but will leave us very very little deposit to but a 2 bed flat.

and with our son starting school next year we already dont know how that will effect my wifes job working around school times.

god we want another but its nearly been 4 years since the first and we are still going back and forth now.

do we go for it and not have regrets later in life, or do we stay as we are and not have the money stress or sale stress.

help!

Honestly…I would sell the flat, pay off the debts, move and save to buy your own place again and THEN have another. Otherwise no wouldn’t have another AT ALL!!

You can't afford another child.

You can't afford your current circumstances.

You need your diet that out first.

You are still very young with plenty of child bearing years ahead.

Get yourself on a more stable financial footing first.

What you're saying about finances isn't making sense.

But, you're not actually in a studio flat. You're in a one bedroom flat. At your age I'd have another now. Baby sleeps with you and wife and eventually shares a bedroom with your eldest. You'll have lots of hand-me-down clothes. Then get saving while they're young and move later. You clearly want another, ans in a one bedroom flat you can make it work while the kids are young.

You need a solid plan to save and be out before they're older though.

Clear your debts & get into a financial footing before acquiring more by adding a second child to the mix. Otherwise you will end up in perpetual debt and living in a place that is too small for you all.

have a 2/3 year plan on how that is going to happen.

Have you looked at what you can borrow in order to get a two bed, or are you moving to a cheaper location? Interest rates are still really high so how
will you afford the increase in mortgage repayments, especially with reduced income from maternity leave? How will you pay for nursery fees or will one of you go back part time… again reduced income.

It’s very well to want another child, I really get it but is it fair if it means you’ll have even less money for your current child? And if this child is a different gender at some point you will need a three bed.

Interested as to why it's only your wife's job which may be effected by finding childcare around school times. If you want a child so badly wouldn't you also be willing to adapt your working schedule?

Kids aren’t “things”, though.

It’s a one bed, not a studio. I know several people who have two DC in a one bed, but they did eventually move when the younger one was a toddler.

No, they are living breathing things that have needs and we should make sure we can meet those needs before we have them

How much equity is there in you flat and how much debt do you have? Why do you have debt? Is it because you are already living above your means? Why is only your wife's job going to be affected by your son going to school, are you not also their parent?

Regardless of the answers to the above, I think you both need to get more financially mature/sensible and create a sustainable life for the child you have, then have another kid if you still want one. At the moment it doesn's sound like you can afford parental leave or additional childcare costs.

No, you do all of that before even thinking of pregnancy. If you want to do that then do that. You should anyway if you're in a studio flat. Think of your your existing kid first. A studio flat isn't ideal.

I think your plan of selling your current studio flat, clearing your debt, and buying a 2 bedroom flat then trying for a baby is a fine idea. If it were me, I'd go for it.

How did you get into the debt that you have? Is that from a major purchase or is it covering your day to day expenditure to keep the plates spinning? What opportunities do you have to increase you or your wife's income - will there be a promotion on the horizon or do you have any other plans in place?

How much equity do you have in your property, if you sold up and moved area could you get a bigger place without incurring a larger mortgage, could you commute or relocate jobs?

This doesn’t make sense.

If you could sell your flat, clear your debt and move to a bigger place, (a) how - move to a much cheaper area? (b) why aren’t you just doing this immediately anyway?

You say you “don’t know”’ how your current child being at school will affect your wife’s work. Why not? Surely you understand what hours she must work, what flexibility is possible in the company, and what hours your child goes to school? This needs to and can be properly planned. What about your job’s flexibility? (But if she may be on mat leave anyway surely that would solve some of the short term difficulty?)

Overall it doesn’t sound like you’re particularly organised or realistic or good at planning. “I want” isn’t a good reason to have another child with no idea how it will work.