Why did you have more than one child ?

[Snowdrops17]

Just that really , I just had my first baby she is 14 weeks. I always thought I would have 2 children mainly because I'm an only child and didn't want that for mine, personally I think it's fine when your a child but it's very lonely and hard the older you get and the older your parents get. We don't have any family close and she will have no cousins her age and although I really don't fancy doing this all over again as it's been so much harder than I could of ever imagined we also tried to conceive for 2 years before getting pregnant. we will try for a second for her sake maybe in a years time. Just curious really .

I've always had a good relationship with my siblings and hoped my kids would too. Personally, I'd have hated to have been an only child.

Obviously I know these things are very dependent on the children, but you can't know ahead of time what their personalities will be, and you have to go off something to make the decision so I reckon your own feelings about it are as good a guide as anything else.

I had another baby because I wanted another baby. I didn’t do it for DD’s sake because no guarantee they’d even get on, as it happens they do but I also look at how things are for her friends that are onlys and think they have a great time of it too without having to consider younger ones in everything. You’re only 14 weeks PP! I wouldn’t even be thinking about this for at least another year, maybe even 2.

Wanted another baby……wanted a sibling for number 1 ……. So then we had a boy and a girl with a 2 year gap…..was happy with that…..didn’t plan for anymore…...5 years later, unexpected pregnancy which resulted in number 3

I’m an only child and, as you say it’s hard being the only one as parents get older and more disabled. I didn’t want that for mine. I ended up with 4, the baby period is hell on wheels though. I like 2-7 especially and older teens are sometimes a joy.
Mine are all adults (and that’s the best stage, they’re wonderful.)

Wanted another baby + wanted a sibling for a very loving DS. Not planning on a 3rd, don't want adults to be outnumbered by kids! 😂

I'm an only child and I never imagined having more than one. But I got twins! Boy & girl. They are very different and they didn't like each other much but they're starting to get on now. They're 30!

So I don't think I'd have had another one if I'd only had one. It's hard work!

I wanted my children to have siblings. I am an only child as is my husband so my kids wouldn’t have had any aunties or uncles. Etc

best decision I ever made

I wanted another my family just didn't feel complete. Partly also wanted a sibling for my DS

DP had a vasectomy after our second as we were 100% done. Mine are 4 and nearly 2 and life is getting easier as they have started to play together and they are very cute together

Slightly different route here but my children are adopted. Had a miracle adoption with ds and wanted him to have a sibling. But there were no guarantees we'd be lucky again. DD is 3.5 years younger. But ds could easily have been an only child.

I just had 1. I always thought I would have 2, but motherhood is far from what I imagined. I couldn't be a mum to ds if I had another. I wouldn't cope with more. He doesn't deserve that.

Honestly, I really wanted a girl and wanted another shot.

Another boy would have been loved and doted on, but that was the driving reason if I’m really honest.

Hey OP. Always a very individual choice. I have two sisters, both who never wanted any children and both unexpectedly fell pregnant and now have a DS each. Neither plans to have any more.
I was married early and had two DC just short of two years apart. I didn't want a single child. I was happy with that, but following a marriage break down, and a new partner who had no children, I find myself with four DC as there was no way I wanted to have two teenagers and a baby who would have no company and be a younger "only child" as the older siblings are not going to relate to the younger ones the same. Hence I now have DS 18, DD 16, DD almost 2 and DD 5 months.
It's bloody hard work I won't lie, and I miss having the time to myself that I had whilst my older two were well up and away to school, but my goodness the fun I have with the smaller ones when they are home with me and then the bigger ones come into the mix in the evenings and at weekend. The toddler loves her big brother and big sis. She calls for them every day and the smiles from them all makes it so worthwhile.
It's not for everyone OP, and I never pictured having 4 kids (plus an angel baby) but I'm here now and wouldn't change it. If it makes and difference I'm 41 just for comparison.

I have three. Dh was clear that he wanted more than one. I didn't think about it in quite the same way he did (I think his thoughts were about his children having the experience of siblings) but I just enjoyed having children, I suppose.

I do think life with, and as, an only child can be very happy, no less happy than our life is with three siblings who all get on.

My reasons - we wanted another one, I wanted a sibling for dc & it felt right.

We have one of each and they really do love one another. I think they are each other’s favourite person. (although dd wouldn’t go near him for the 1st 4 weeks after he was born🤣)

There’s a 3 year age gap, dd was already out of nappies and understood more etc once ds came along. It’s a ideal age gap imo, but I know you can’t plan these things.

To be completely honest, apart from the fact that I wanted to be a parent to 2 children, a big deciding factor was that I didn’t want to be childless if my child died, as grim as that seems. My best friend growing up died at 18 just as she was getting ready to move away to uni (from meningitis). She was an only child and it really impacted me thinking about her poor parents who raised her with all the hopes for the life she’d live and then she was just gone, they never had a child’s wedding to plan, or grandchildren to look forward to. It was just devastating.

It’s a bit sad to think about, but I had 2 children really to build in the insurance that even if something happened to one of them, as awful as that would be, I’d still have the other. Not so much to look after me when I’m old, but just to be in my life.

At 14 weeks though, absolutely no way I could have even pondered it. Don’t get ahead of yourself. Enjoy your baby. I didn’t feel ready until my eldest was 3.5. There’s a 5 year age gap between mine which has been perfect.

I got twins.

My first child died, so we had another. Not to replace her, but because she wanted a child so badly. If she hadn’t died then we would have likely have just stuck with one as she would have been very disabled. Now we just have my son

Me and DH were both from 2 child families and there was a bit of stick with what you know. I didn't want 2 enough for a big gap so we had a loose time limit for TTC DC2.

We were tricked into it as DS1 was very cute and funny when he was 14 months.

I like babies and children and being a mum!

Stopping at 2 sadly because of age and health and money. Also having a larger gap.

You have ages to decide OP!

Having 4 younger brothers and sisters, I couldn't imagine being an only child. I wanted 3, but my husband only wanted 2, so that's where we're stopping. Part of me still thinks 2 isn't quite enough, but I can't imagine getting though the baby years again.

Because my family picture in my head always had three children in it. Whenever I thought about what my family would look like it was always 3 children. No idea why though lol.

Pregnancy was really hard for me even with my first. Labours were quick tho so silver lining. Newborn stage hard with first and to be fair all stages hard with first lol. But it never crossed my mind not to go through it again with my other children. The feelings I have towards my children out way any crappy pregnancies I have had. Even after losing my second as she was stillborn, I went through it all again for my third.

My only debate now is....I have three children all be it one not with us anymore. Do we try for another? I never imagined 4 children but also never imagined one of my three would not be with us.

I have one dc. He’s 5 and I’d like 2 more in the next few years.

I can’t fully explain why. I always imagined my children would be close in age and I’d have 2-3. Due to dc being unplanned and needing more time to get my life together after he was born things have been delayed (purposely).

Dc is fine with being an only but I find it very hard with him needing constant adult attention. I also feel a bit sad and guilty at the thought of him not having siblings. My sister and I are 9 years apart so the age gap doesn’t bother me (we’ve always been very close). I just want him to have a sibling in his adult life more than anything. I said if I have more then it will have to be a pair close in age. I’ve somewhat experienced having an only child and I’d like to see the other side of it…besides, I always wanted a big-ish family as my family is so small!

Totally understand this now that I have my own .

Oh my gosh I'm so very sorry for your loss x