Please help child with bad toothache

[ConfusedConfuse]

My daughter has horrible tooth ache but she is autistic and won't let the dentist look never mind do anything so they can't, we are awaiting a referral to the hospital but been told this will be 6 months minimum but in the mean time she is screaming and crying in pain I can't take her anywhere as she is kicking off horrifically, she's screaming the place down but won't take any medication, what else can I do I'm at a loss

Have you told them to put you down for a last minute cancellation ?
New referrals are almost always either sedation or general anaesthesia assessments, it takes time and planning-but the sooner she has the initial assessment, the sooner she'll be sorted definitively.
If work could be done without sedation and or general anaesthesia , your own general dentist would have done it already.
You need to make a nuisance of yourself with Kings basically. Keep badgering, do you have a social worker? Get them to assist, if so.

Honestly if it gets too bad I would just take her to A&E. any hospital with a maxfax dept should be able to see her and if GA is needed they will have to do it. It's just the same as if there was any other issue with your daughter they would still need to see her if she's in pain! Not sure if you have a learning disability clinic or service in your area you could contact for advice also?

To the pp, Max Fac will only take a patient for an urgent GA if there are systemic signs of spreading infection from dental origin; dental pain however severe/ agonising, will not meet the threshold regardless of LD, ASD.

op do you have a community dental service in your area? is this the specialist service she has been referred to with 6 month wait? if so call them and explain the situation they should be able to see her for an emergency appointment. if it is not where she has been referred to already then that is the best place. which area are you in? when i worked in the cds we had emergency xla spaces on our childrens list if needed

@ConfusedConfuse why is it that you think she will be willing to sit in a chair and be examined at the referral, but she won’t do that for the dentist now?
I have no idea, but if you got a gp appt and they saw how bad the pain is do you think there’s any prospect of them prescribing a sedative so she can at least see the dentist?

I don't but at this point it feels neglectful leaving her in this amount of pain especially as she is refusing pain relief and has been screaming and crying all day today and yesterday I'm at breaking point it is very hard as I'm a lone parent so listening to a child screaming for 2 days straight has been challenging when you can't even get an escape from it. I hoped she would let them look today as she said she would allow them to look. They are the ones that insisted she goes to the hospital because she was crying hysterically at the dentist.

We are in SE London/ Kent. the place we have been referred to is the community dental service (special care dentist)

What a terrible situation.

I had toothache last year and my nonexistent nhs dentist would not see me (as he was nonexistent) and I was in so much pain. I ended up not being able to eat and I went to A&E and was sent home...to go and see the dentist. When I eventually did get to see one I was prescribed antibiotics and was feeling better in half a day. There was a sit and wait service that I was sent to two hours away from where I live where you could see a dentist in a hospital. I was sent there by NHS direct or whatever it's called.

Sounds challenging but dental infections can be nasty so I don't think you can ignore it or wait for a referral.

ok op so call the cds clinic you should have the contact details and explain what is going on. we would always see patients on the w list in cases like these they should help. i think for kent head office is in Faversham

If she does not want to take pills, can you give her liquid neurofen?
It is quite strong and childrens version is sweet and goes up to age of 12. Think a dose for 12y old should cover your 13y old.
You can alternate it with calpol as long as you leave enough time between same syrup doses as stated.

You need to get some help to get her into the dentist now, not at a future referral. As there’s no plan for her for if she refuses to see the referral dentist.
At least try gp, I don’t know if oral sedative can be prescribed by gp for a child?

I've only ready explained I've tried the gp and the receptionist wouldn't even book an appointment as she said the gp won't have anything to do with dental care.

Surely you tell receptionist she’s having a full blown major anxiety attack etc and don’t mention dental?

Can you ask school for a social story? It's essentially a few simple pictures to help say something but if she had LD it might make it easier to explain what will happen at the dentists. Hope you get something sorted. Poor wee thing

She’s going to have to be sedated and treated, one way or another, and it definitely can’t wait six months. What dentist has said that it can without even being able to assess her? That is insane.

Ps I am sorry you’ve been left so unsupported OP, it’s terrible.

My dd would be exactly the same, and she doesn’t have LD. She isn’t going to let them look. She’ll have to be sedated.

You definitely need to phone the community dentist and explain the situation. Or go to a&e. Explain that you’re worried about infection leading to sepsis, as well as her pain levels.

Do you have a disability social worker? they can sometimes help in these types of situations. Also maybe try contacting mencap they are really good for advice and signposting for people with LD.

Anbesol liquid is so good just rub a bit on gums and numbs them also doesn't taste awful xx

I can't believe they never prescribed an antibiotic. That's what she needs

Op I was wondering if there's anyway you could borrow the money from a family member or friend for private emergency dental care.
My son is non verbal severely autistic with Arfid and won't let anyone go near his mouth (his actually got his dental checkup next Tuesday and I'm already dreading it)
It's so hard being a lone parent to a child on the spectrum with no support.
My son is also 13.
I feel very frustrated for you and I really hope someone can see your daughter soon bless her

A&E?

Thinking of you, what a terribly stressful and emotional situation 😞

This is, sadly, a common issue for kids with autism and LDs. There is no adequate dental service for them. Long waiting lists are the norm. It’s a scandal.

OP, I heard recently that there are services for people with learning disabilities. Nurses can meet you in A&E and help to support you and your child as you wait. And this does sound like an A&E issue if you’re expected to wait 6 months just for an initial assessment. Your child does not need to be in agony for months.

It sounds like you maybe aren’t on the radar of learning disability teams who should be helping you. Have a word with school to see if they can signpost you or refer you to them.

I saw this post and thought of you, if you're anywhere near? They may be able to sedate?